Today i was sitting under the shower
and thinking
thinking about all the teenage woes i have
and how the stupidest things can
consume my attention
in the midst of this i had a
moment when my mind
cleared and
just
stopped
thinking.
.
.
.
i focused on the little drops of watter
massaging my skin
this sensation sent a shiver up my spine.
for some reason the widest grin
appeared on my face
i felt as happy as a five year old
i closed my eyes and tilted my head
towards the water source.
the warmth ran down my face.
as the water seeped into my my nose and
between my lips i felt
alsmost as if i were
drowning.
....
when i realised i was being waistful,
i turned the faucet off and became
hypnotized by the steady dripping
id like the believe this event was significant
but i think it only further proves my insanity

For me life is a worthless thing,
which has no values and no importance after realising which always forms a negligence of aliving,
i lost everything,every feeling i had,
and i dont ver cry when i am sad,
it seems to be no one who can understand and believe me,
i even lost my self in the worthless and selfish world which made me a liar,
and push me into the deadly series of fire,
but there is a greed of revenge
against world's narrow mindness,
which i never understood even dying with them,
there are almost all evil things happens in me devil life,
in which i am fighting with endless reasons to die,
after knowing  that no one have the ability to understand my emotions from which i am suffering and living in frustations,
no refinding is left of myself after overcoming from reason less figths which having preconceptions in the past time,
so leave me my life cause i alsmost and finaly want to die.
# Akash