The coolest part about the open door to my house-
Our unlocked, hardly ever closed front door-
Is that someone random always walks in right in the middle of me throwing a fit
Right in the middle of any breakdown I'm having
Someone always walks in on time to think "what a *****"
This isn't a ******* poem
And who even ******* cares
(This is me talking to the internet because no one in real life wants to talk to me)

And I can't tell you that it hurts
Cause it's not supposed to
And I can't tell you that I miss you
Cause I'm not supposed to

And I can't tell you that I need you to sleep
Cause I'm not supposed to
And I can't tell you I want to talk to you more than anyone else
Cause I'm not supposed to
And I can't tell you that I wish I could watch you smile once more
Cause I'm not supposed to

And I can't tell you I'm sorry
Cause I'm not

I bet we're going to kiss like addicts hungry for a hit and I'm sorry I'm not made of much except bruises and bleeding knuckles. Your words mostly touch me but I'm begging for your hands to instead. My mind used to be made up of cemeteries and all I thought about was writing eulogies to how dead I felt inside.
I want you to stain my teeth and leave your taste in my mouth permanently. I want you to swallow me whole and take me daily like I'm apart of your well being like you are for me.
A lot of the time I want you naked and quivering for me and a lot of the time I want you wrapped around me so tightly that nothing could tear you apart from me like this ******* distance is right now. I want my name bruised down your spine so you don't leave yourself in ruins.
This is messy and scattered but so are we and I love you more that I know how to breathe.