picking at imperfections like the pimples on my face
now each bite leaves a sour taste
bitter moments tipping on my tongue
smoke filled air trapped inside my lungs
black and white are the only colors i see
i can't even hear the ground underneath my feet
my soul has lost its senses to live
i have lost everything, what is there left to give

I had never seen such pretty tears
I wanted to feel each drop
Taste the sadness
But I would give you all my tears
To make it stop
To take the pain
To see your smile
Of sun and light
Without it
My world is not bright

Give me one reason
To love
To feel
When there are a million ways
To break
and fall

They say don't go upstairs without turning the lights on
But I fumble in the dark forever
Unable to find the switch

The winter is cold
But her mind is thawed
The travelled roads
Icy and flawed
Tracks in the snow
She aimlessly walks
As the flakes blow
And the wind talks

She said you are like the leaves
Beautiful when you cling, hung to the branches
But elegant even when you fall

Sink or swim
This ice is too thin
Clumsy and cold
You must play these cards or fold
We aren't always dealt the best hand
Life isn't always a product we make
But feelings inside us that give us a chance
To be a different version and say it was fate

I am rays of sun and shine
But Inside I am a cave
disguising on the outside
By hiding the darkness I became

Don’t envy the moment you failed
Because it happened
You were able to fail
Some are incapable of even trying
And that is why you have succeeded

If becoming lost
Lead me into your arms
And guided me to your heart
I don't ever want to be found

I envy her touch
On you
Because it makes you glow
Where mine made you bruise

she wanders home
a hopeless act
a play of fear
in tired tracks
but she cannot see
the lights are out
in the restless sea
of people peering 'bout
a life like a movie of sets
looking upon the stars
but all stopped as her eyes met
the bright Hollywood signs and boulevards

Crippled and confused
Sits the tree behind my house
Storm after storm its branches growing scarce
The branches are like the friendships that have been broken
Severed from my life as I splinter and crumble
Isolated and left bare

She told me not to worry
as my mind expanded
the restless thoughts pushing out
through the cracks
that the mouths of the oppressors made
these cracks formed a pattern
perfectly correlated pain
like the tears rolling down my cheeks
now they stain

L osing time
O bsessing over each moment, how could it end
S weet love return, be mine
T ake my moments again

Boys can't see
What a woman needs
They see a woman as a toy
One with pieces and parts to
Tear apart and put back together
Parts to manipulate into something new
To see how many versions they can make of you

He broke me
took my mind
and twisted it
till my thoughts became lost
and I didn't recognize my own soul
now he won't leave
or let me go back
I want to be me again
to look in a mirror
and know who I see
to feel joy
to be suffocated by laughter
and feel pure emotion that isn't pain
to live a life, not play a game

He talks so unspoken
As the words dance up and down his tongue
He doesn't want to speak
But she entrances his every muscle
And movement
He can't hear the words that hang in the air
But he's sure of her
He's taken away by her every inch of beauty
The color of her soul ignites a flood
Of happiness
Something he could never imagine
Nothing like in his dreams
He can't understand why she has a hold on him
But he's blessed she did
Because where would he be
Without that girl, he met in a bookstore
Reading words he never thought he could say
Words he never knew could become true
Until he met you

The sun sits on the water
Floating
Bobbing at sea
The moon glow spies through the trees
Peeking
Hide and go seek

I know you have been feeling alone
I know what it is like
I wish I could tell you it never lasts
But the time drags on
It takes everything out of you
Your soul grows tired
And your heart loses faith
will you ever be able to trust another
will you ever find that place
Where you can speak your mind
With no fear
Show love
With no regret
And be yourself
Without feeling as if you are not enough
Because remember this
For someone, you amount to everything
For someone, you are everything that there ever will be
That someone is me
And you make me complete

Life is complicated
You hear that again and again
Because life complicates you
The person you were changes
Into someone you use to be
And the decisions you make
Put you in dark places
That you try to pull yourself out of
Telling yourself that you have to change
But you can’t
Because change scares you
As you constantly lose
Your friends, family, love
And you don't know how to overcome it
It's like walking through a house that’s on fire
You can't see where you're going
You don't know where you are
You can barely breath
But you keep moving forward
Hoping you find your way out
Of the burning house

I told you it would hurt
Lies
Of burning fire
Cold desires
No future
Won't reconcile
Torn seams and
Quilted smiles
All because
Were too afraid to live
Than we are scared to die

The depth of love
Cannot extend to those hidden
Under waves of resentment

The world falls apart when we all stay still
When we pretend nothing is our problem
But we are capable of taking everything
The world falls apart as we hide in the shadows
When we make the monsters our own and leave them under our children’s beds
It is our doing as we ignore
As we pretend
That nothing truly ends
Maybe it does not have to end

But we will still suffer
As the sky grows black
And the ground is filled with cracks
Brittles bones of tree trunks
Elephants without tusks
Nothing but ashes fill the sky
And a little child asks why

Why does everything die ?
Why don’t the clouds cry ?
Where did the bears go ?
What happened to their home ?

It is our own doing
We are the monsters we make
And we have set them all free
And there is no time left
To mute the screams
No arc to preserve the flesh
we have left
Only time to watch and eyes to dull
Because we chose money and greed
Things that don’t matter to you or me

I’m sorry my child
There will be no more blue skies
Or clouds that cry
Only darkness
And death
The world has suffered too much debt

Love is the ability to let go
And continue to exist

Life is an equation
a collection of positives and negatives
and when times are the darkest
we cannot see the whole of the sum
but only the dashes, the minuses

life is not finding the answers
it's working through the equation
step by step

and I have never been good at math

I find the hardest words are the simplest to say
Simpler than love simpler than happiness
Less confusing
More amusing
The tongue knows of words
Not of feelings
So why can’t I say it
Because my mind doesn’t understand the meaning of love
And my heart cannot feel it
It’s a mystery
But it is only a word
Make it real
feel