Frightening.
Cannot yet must.
Strength and bravery
will help me through.

Faith.
Christ will strengthen.
I can do
all things through Him.

Nobility.
Honor from peers.
Acceptance may falter
but respect will not.

Anything.
Scares or upsets.
Overcoming a problem
when you try best.

Courage.
Strength through faith.
Nobility and bravery:
earn honor above all.

You're daring to walk closer.
Taunting, pleading.
You're one step away.
It hears your cry.
Turn! Run! Why?
This is what you wanted!

And the way your smiling eyes look at me,
caring,
checking that I am alright.
That look.
Every detail of your face.
The way you are always kind,
thoughtful.
You stop and rest,
waiting,
knowing that I cannot go on.
Itching to move, yet patient.
This is you.
You care.
You're kind.
You're thoughtful,
patient.
Every day
as I notice the little things you do and say,
I fall.

Hands are shaking but I know they won't fail.
Stepping up the the line - my sixty mark.
This is nothing like running on a trail.
Different from hitting out of the park.

The run-up looks easy but it's quite hard.
Counting steps to correctly plant the pole.
To pull myself up, my arms must be barred.
My body must have the strength of a troll.

Powerful kick to get to inversion.
The sensation of being upside down
is nasty and takes complete conversion.
I fly up and over the bar and town.

And the difference between me and you:
my parents are proud of the high I do.

Where do I begin?
So I was lost
and I'm terrified of these four walls.
And if I close my eyes,
I'm falling
With my heart like a stone
and these broken wings.
How am I gonna be an optimist about this?
These city walls
of my callous mind
ain't got no love for me
and the effect of my shame.
I want to know what it's like
to be the last one standing,
neither lost nor found.
These iron bars can't hold my soul in.
I'm gonna leave this life behind me.
It's worth saving me,
I'll show what I can be.
And as the clouds roll over the hills
I crawl on hands and knees.
The walls come down in the city
and I scream.
But when I'm on my knees
I'll still believe
Because Heaven's gates open up
and the dust settles around me.

Even on my darker nights
my mind is quiescent,
unable to storm
while silently harboring
blatant thoughts of you.

Left every move uncertain
Eerie malevolent phantom
no proper contact of Touch
There was no Howl nor sound
people said he Existed
Dear voice of Every child -
Afraid of the Dark
railing Broken cough
Uneasy steps
Reeling in as the Young moon draws water
Thin Hands drive scissors
Expression suprisingly warm
mouth Drooling open
Early when the moon was down
Asking, will you take me home?
shooting a Dead mockingbird

A burning pain of sensational fear
I stand amid the moaning roar
Humbly undermine and become your heart
Fall to oblivion beyond the rim of flame

Bring upon a gloomy blithe
Remembrance of a surf-tormented shore
Suicidally beautiful, a blessēd curse
Power of the universe beating in your chest

Tears rolling down my cheeks
This is not strength
I can do better than this
But sometimes
My heart and mind
Overflow
And I don't say a word
Not wanting to worry you

Pointless.
Arrogant ****.
Have you been plotting?

I surrender my soul.
And receive honest unscrupulous agony.
I'm paralyzed in terrible vindication:

You're a swindling hypocrite.

And my mind
is filled with dreams,
images of happenings
that will never occur.

And I'm drowning in hope
yet ready to be crushed
by the overwhelming sense
of reaching the terrifying surface

And as I begin to sink,
hope turns to despair.
The world turns dark.
I inhale a fresh breath,
ready to start again.

My train of thought
turns your way

but you've derailed
and crashed into the brush

trying to get away.

Your heavy heart is mine to bear,
Constantly shedding blissful tear.
A binding mystery, return the favor.
Feed my soul taste which I savor.

But in a single silent kiss,
I shrink, I shiver, do not miss.
Allowance of doubt comes in swift force.
A stab of pain and convulsive remorse.