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Sep 2023 · 67
Squinting and Blinking
Walter Alter Sep 2023
you have a mind
your mileage may vary
on this floating grain of sand
he prayed over and over
be far away be far far away
at least he was smart enough to know
what an idiot at prayer he was
not exactly a random sampling
but life is a subjective-objective combo dish
try not to make your singular and perpetual
problems into my singular etc.
since I am a frail hemopheliac
pursued by jackals and hyenas
tracking blood up the stairway
for not acting in a timely manner
but the fact is that the late blossoms
are deeper hued longer and wider
and that's not a purposeful misnomer
may God part my *** to his ways
if I am shown to be in error
but times change and the irrelevant
eventually sinks noiselessly
into the sea but not just any sea
the exceedingly stormy Sea of Similar
yes some things are similar to others
and that's the mother of all cans of worms
it's a matter of screen resolution
which some may find nauseating
the engineers of Armageddon for example
as the weight of their wagers
crushes your spine and unleashes madmen
whose timely and public pillorying
would greatly benefit a humanity
screaming power to the feeble
hoping that the Universe is a great ******
I used to be a moving target
but now I'm a sitting duck
well not sitting per se
more a catatonic shuffle
that served to confound and confabulate
by who or for what purpose
remains to be investigated
by who or for what purpose
lies beyond my rank and armor
well not sitting per se
more a streak on the horizon
because we need to know the future
because the earthly love rocket
will get us there eventually
now there's a universal
even among the aimless

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Walter Alter Sep 2023
It never melted for starters
the Magic Icicle could talk
it had humors jealousies aversions
deep rending tides of love
and week long fits of giggling
It had been crafted by Father Frost
The Emperor of the North
his breath could wreck a train
and send a picnic scattering
Billy never met the Frost King
who he heard was a ballroom dancer
fast on his feet tipita tapita
the dance finals were approaching
it was Billy's job to suss the opposition
his reports gave the Emperor
a step up on the competition
which was stiff as beaten egg whites
there were the castrati pair
Harley and Davidson
who were fast and supple
and could ignite a rattling ****
10 feet from the judges' candle
and rocket blurringly past them
like the jaguar under a jungle moon
there was Nip and Tuck
Edwardians from the pages of Lord Knackwit
they could anticipate every dip and swirl
and often stood quite still
then there were the Rubber Twins
Bobby Rubber and Loquatia Rubber
gliding ever gliding and then rebounding
in a ricochet ballet of Newtonian elasticity
with a certainty that will pirouette right over
your thin skinned inadequacies
undying in their devotion
to ******* and ropes and pulleys
and an elephant in a china shop agenda
while crickets rubbed their lanterns bright
and the night grew big as the Frog of Creation
hopping and hipping you along
on the dance floor of partial eternity
so loosen up and listen up
it's just that we really must
compare categories more often
actually hold them side by side
hold them up to death the little icon
in the corner of my screen
no way I'm going to click on it
it's going to have to click on me
and here we are at another frozen end
please accept your melting icicle statue
the Emperor's Sno Cone of Attention Award

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Sep 2023 · 79
Parasite Seeks Host
Walter Alter Sep 2023
classified personal ad
parasite seeks host
now that we're friends can I talk *****
last night I ****** your wife
this looks like a nice place to stop
the problem with learning truth
is that you must conclude
how could I have been so stupid
words exist somewhere before spoken
excuse me accuse me words
my tracheotomy should be here by now
like the tribe with ears for lips
fortunately my molecules are all
somewhat trained to obey my wishes
the advantages of a rubber face
is that it holds more soup
all the dinner plates had tooth marks
eating the sunrise for breakfast
watching the aurora on TV
why not hold a festival at this very moment
while laying about on cushions
naturally I refused to take orders
and ducked into the post office
to search the posters for a kindly face
and weave my hair into a bird nest
at dawn the ambulance pulled up
and emptied the refrigerator
took the furniture and light bulbs
under a black and silver mountain of cloud
stretching from horizon to horizon
the wind was so fierce
flower blossoms became deadly missiles
the sand storm broke all my bones
they set wrong and the doctor said
we'll have to break them all again
one by one with a hammer and chisel
now that's a real armpit full of bacteria
I'll have to sit still and pose for the sculptor
with the radio turned up really loud
causes and their waiting effects
strangled and dangled at the city gate
yesterday's front page stuck to my shoe
the past is the space around things
memory is right here not distant
and poetry is not written to relieve tension
a man who reads clouds told me
look children he can rhyme
we have so many things to do
the world is such a mess
the sun goes down
the moon comes up
I really must undress

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Walter Alter Sep 2023
my assassin hisses from behind his curtain
there's nobody here
with a stand up comic's grin
so he turned to practical jokes
got the gods tumbling spire over minaret
suffering a vigorously impious scorn
the pit bull lobby eventually had him banned
for making life into a pastoral meadow
but reposeful bliss eluded him
instead an agitated bliss on all his channels
being it was a game of hobbled feet
marrying truth to insanity
and created a race of juggling pundits
ringing like temple gongs
inherently bourgeois anarchist epicureans
wanting what is best is not always pretty
but nothing padded his gaze
observe the scale and the detail
the ruling class toiling all night
gave us minds and wills and forgetfulness
arise from the dead said the angel Mr. Blinky
kiss my sassafras *** said Billy Nitro
Scamper his Mongolian chihuahua
barking and snapping in emphasis
the times of laughter are over
he decanted in all silliness
so **** it laugh anyway
this is a limited time offer
you've read this you can't unread it
but what choice did I have
chronically coming up empty handed
flapping in the wind and no ******
vast and complex was Blinky's hypothermia
from deep within the Putumayo
a million chimeras cried for blood
the lava flowed round Pele's feet
upscale and chic descended to shopping cart
as the armless Venus glided towards him
fresh from a dump in a highway pay toilet
all love and germs in a clueless crescendo
freed him from omen slavery
Pol Potted the world of its many *******
Venus pulled him close
her hot breath made his hairs dance
she exhaled softly
you don't have to scream
to keep yourself awake
she could read a phoneme
like the moon in the river
as they pronounced us man and woman
their chief hipster said crazy man crazy
you are a freak like us
act accordingly

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Sep 2023 · 60
Kiss the Snake
Walter Alter Sep 2023
my meme replacement therapy
is going quite well Dr. Nil just told me
because I can't handle everything thrown at me
everything is a lot and GIGO to boot
the fibrous growth in my ear
said that the future signals us in some way
maybe coded glances wink wink
but we're not sure of the spelling
a real spectacle of setbacks
a bleeding archaeological phantom
engineered to manipulate
moving my pen in gleeful jerks
with a genteel appetite for mayhem
which is why I am now sharing
the secret of life with you
ready
mind is derivative
well that's it
looks like I've blown my cover
if this sounds like propaganda then it is
now to get on to the meatier part
first a matter of indexing
last a matter of indexing
buzzards circle my guardian bottle of muscatel
and a couple of robins too
a tempestuous tune in a teapot
from follow the bouncing ball
to Rocky Horror Show
occult syntax as a 2nd language
and that was the last surface
his wiggly digits ever palpated
because the sages lie through their teeth
but have good circulation and a ruddy face
with long lists of abjurations as usual
one of them spoke just now
sending me in to negotiate
because I have a snake pit for a soul
on further reflection it turns out
I have many souls
most of them severe critics
several are wind up toys
academic or practical you decide
existence is both diagrammatic
and ready to throw a punch
in an ancient tangle of inconsequentials
well perplexity is the root of all humor
how is it that some ideas
are interpreted by other ideas for example
but whatever you end up doing
we know too much
to be stupid any longer

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Sep 2023 · 66
Ear Infection
Walter Alter Sep 2023
if your humor fails you **** yourself
because they will tell you why you failed
in far too great crippling detail
enemies of play
goose stepping to a zany polka
entire regiments ready to die
for the Nut in the Nuthouse
in a deep cover psyops mole operation
****** with my head like candy from a baby
weather permitting we'll visit the ruins
ancestral whorehouses and wretched genes
but they chose him and the billiard ***** flew
he was known as the glider pilot artist
painted a series of blue canvasses
with a single line down the center
because the mystery is an airy one
held together by a paper clip chain
though we were unjustifiably scared
out of our muttering wits to look
oh dear I believe I've lost
my transparent all-seeing membrane
it was the limpid dawn of another millennium
and its less than daring innovations
by the Mercantilist Association of Research
did its work upon the landscape
and the picture was anti-ros
for Seduction Delightenment and Elongation
their devil women had an undulating beauty
and boy they could really dance
having 3 legs and the gaze of the converted
she snipped his cigar and they got smoochy
it was a Robusto and presently the lights came on
in the passive calm of logic he screamed
with the strength of the oft bamboozled
not so passive then
her tongue curled round the back of his teeth
artillery pounded the trenches all night long
she had always been too much for any man
her star sign was Capricornucopia
one of several million methods
for eating the hearts of strangers
Nature having its benefits and liabilities
as welcome as a volcano as usual
we play lotto on her occasional flowerings
flail at doom and leave spoor
and try to make tension beautiful
what other species is there
that apparently actually wants to die
life has a lot of puzzles
on your way to
the bonfire
in the sky

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Sep 2023 · 53
Black Ops
Walter Alter Sep 2023
Tex Lester and his sidekick Lumpy Bascom
wiggled down the arroyo on their bellies
to better observe a latifundista trouble spot
too hot to touch so they tap danced instead
Lumpy grabbed the walkie talkie and said
hey my turn to change the channels
Tex said OK Lumpy said here goes
your eyelids are turning transparent
every lock has a key but some are kinda rusty
it was an irreducible problem
on a sliding scale as usual
nothing so precious as a mind
overcoming its own psychosis
nothing so dangerous so revealing
what makes potential seem immediate
who can have infinite protection
working yourself to exhaustion can help
if you are an original sin Catholic
it has been 7 seconds since my last confession
contusions from the infant cradle
held to the sky in blessing
but the fields always droop and wither
and we always have the rest of our lives
the latifundista was under attack
by an army of particulars
bringing the guilty to the book
if  they go apoplectic it usually means
there's a **** in the butter dish
at this point grab life by the ***
a balm for the paranoid shakes
or life's analog of the ****** Mary
offering her writhing body to lepers
entering heaven in her bent Bentley
while the rebels arouse themselves
as her personal representative
no keener mortal praise exists
except by her blind biographers
and their company of war chariots
our task is to mend civilization
without getting our ***** shot off
but at my age it's an empty threat
funny you don't see many
geriatric suicide bombers
a relic from grandma's day
where tradition was not the joke
it certainly is today unless it is a
tradition of mockery

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Sep 2023 · 40
Moth Wings
Walter Alter Sep 2023
the circumstance of his birth
had somehow become joined
to the circumstance of his life
raised on cowboys and Indians
when no bigger than a twig
alone on a little mattress
talking to limp cloth animals
explains much of this
chromosome damage no doubt
a chugging tractor discs the soil
a mile away growing unheard
as sleep opens its music box lid
my rapid pulse is transformed
and becomes visible as black spots
which begin to grow together
eyes begin to move independently
floating face up I think they are open
wishing they were lanterns instead of
window panes unable to blink back the view
held open by the weight of two images
the great mound of bones and teeth
scene of rituals unspeakable
sordid affairs and so ordinary
if they tell you there's no describing it
they'd better have a blank expression
victims of gravity searching for a place
where the double war between
the odds and evens has not yet reached
wondering who invented tables and chairs
calendar on the wall brittle and torn
by a window climbing sun
pages flutter like moth wings
whispering parts of speech syllables
a screen door bangs dogs bark
crossing the linoleum a trail of ants
water drips in the sink
a moon rises over mobile homes
drawn in a circle against the dark
red flares line the highway at night
vagrancies outstrip the vacancies
with charlatans on every street corner
in a fervent denial of perception
before the rubble of the holy ziggurat
burnt offerings burnt heretic
having learned how to learn
he began to teach how to teach
on the plan-it planet
finding fresh chewing gum
stuck under the diner counter
when is an idea dead and useless
you'll need to be able to spell dog and cat

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Sep 2023 · 44
Self as Hallucinationtled
Walter Alter Sep 2023
their councils priced themselves
straight out of the mystery market
augmentation via will power gone idiotic
still overrated by all the cackling heads
of all the Spring Break universities
deluded that they count for something
the professors rushed out into the night
tearing at their eyes what did they see
another circus chainsaw lobotomy
common as dirt in the modern era
so I pulled the stake from my heart
going for broke why not the game is rigged
waste no time on the miraculous
heaven is probably just an office job
no f-words but maybe x-rays
I guess you gotta be your own angel
guide yourself it's that simple
and have the dignity of a learner
lemme know how that works out
radar ******* not there when you look
bought me a week in a Gitmo cage
they slap your wrists and take your legs
with their grandiose fanaticism
wanted my Swiss bank account number
the hole in his head said hello
don't make me shout
over the din of your inner Wurlitzer
running like rats on a carousel
thanks to the beautific potential of things
somewhere out there is another Einstein
on I-5 near the cattle pens
we all want the authentic
but where does the aversion come from
if education is the wealth of a people
trying to end the reign of hairsplitting
and escape the labyrinths of doctrine
you'll be weeping for the human race too
with a tentative grasp of self
high as a kite but driving a straight line
through the headlights of truckers
more than one kind of perfect obviously
if we never slept it would be different
floating above the flames of memory
yes sometimes the call of the wild
is marginally somewhat overwhelming
to the higher cognitive deltas
made me wonder about the sheaves of wheat
that I kept in my Conn Bluenote
right now is freedom right now
and now we come to a standstill

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Walter Alter Sep 2023
now there’s a tongue twister
which has sunk weighted by disbelief
to the bottom of memory
this is a rescue attempt for
eyes trapped behind closed lids
underlying rather than lying per se
not exactly free from connotation
using language to analyze language
playful chimps in God's green jungle
where one of them typed
Shakespeare just last week
I'll unburden myself right now
about my early years a little
if you don't mind
there should be enough to feed
a ghetto of motel dwellers in here
a little fast food ketchup on a Bilderberger
with a Jonestown grape-aide to wash it down
eat your children it makes them smarter
for sure helps them to grow into
distracted fools and madman monks
that way they don't end up
smarter than you every time
because they can grow and you can't
into the idea of one idea
into the idea of many ideas
into the idea of all ideas
they got us this far
they'll get us further
uh oh here come the dervish cops
slappin' leather and ridin' hard
I better slip out the way I came in
hanging on a meat hook
must have been my evil twin officer
he looks a lot like me
except for the hyena fur
he always dishes it out
I always seem to take it
what set of rules are we
upholding tonight officer
the overt or the covert
his depth gauge blew
like a gum wrapper ******
a tragic case of suppression of the fittest
well it looks like I've deduced
the answer to the big question
it begins with you have a mind
and frequently ends with
don't overlook the obvious
what do you want here
musical wind chimes

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Walter Alter Sep 2023
now there’s a tongue twister
which has sunk weighted by disbelief
to the bottom of memory
this is a rescue attempt for
eyes trapped behind closed lids
underlying rather than lying per se
not exactly free from connotation
using language to analyze language
playful chimps in God's green jungle
where one of them typed
Shakespeare just last week
I'll unburden myself right now
about my early years a little
if you don't mind
there should be enough to feed
a ghetto of motel dwellers in here
a little fast food ketchup on a Bilderberger
with a Jonestown grape-aide to wash it down
eat your children it makes them smarter
for sure helps them to grow into
distracted fools and madman monks
that way they don't end up
smarter than you every time
because they can grow and you can't
into the idea of one idea
into the idea of many ideas
into the idea of all ideas
they got us this far
they'll get us further
uh oh here come the dervish cops
slappin' leather and ridin' hard
I better slip out the way I came in
hanging on a meat hook
must have been my evil twin officer
he looks a lot like me
except for the hyena fur
he always dishes it out
I always seem to take it
what set of rules are we
upholding tonight officer
the overt or the covert
his depth gauge blew
like a gum wrapper ******
a tragic case of suppression of the fittest
well it looks like I've deduced
the answer to the big question
it begins with you have a mind
and frequently ends with
don't overlook the obvious
what do you want here
musical wind chimes

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Sep 2023 · 40
Lips on the Tuba
Walter Alter Sep 2023
when Bobby Messiah
the new kid next door
asked if I wanted to see his
Silly Putty **** collection
I know we were on the same page
It was hidden in an old transistor radio
of red plastic with a silver speaker grid
in the shape of a human foot
marred and curling on one corner
where something had pierced a hole in it
a suicide bullet from his ex-mom
Bobby said and I believed him
because Bobby was a natural born Fuhrer
an up and coming 10 year old Genghis Kahn
so opinionated he didn't even know
where his opinions came from
and I was a 9 year old breast feeder
I would have ridden the axle of a 20 wheeler
across the state line if he said it would
prove I wasn't a mud ******* mama's boy
it appeared to me a better bargain
to be anything rather than nothing.
I still hold the line on this position
even though I write from prison
with a new range of ****** expressions
thanks to Bobby's sense of impropriety
and a pocket full of matches
and the result of legal malpractice
by my perfume counter mouthpiece
not finding the magic combo
told me I kept looking around too much
to be taken for an empty seat
wore a noose around my neck tendons
more times than a fish has scales
trying a little harder to separate
what is inside from what is outside
shuffling the index cards over and over
I will describe it further
this planet is an IQ test
the contained has changed
the shape of the container
it may be a 49-51 kind of world kid
but not everyone will clap and sing along
and as long as them brittle
mystic devil fire pickpockets
think they have their lips on the tuba
the free angels will sleep
with a gun in their shorts
for system redundancy's sake

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Sep 2023 · 50
Viva Catalonia!
Walter Alter Sep 2023
his heraldic crest
a donger and yarbles rampant
upon a field of green clover
it was a stone slab of course
donated by a few eggheads in exile
his best friends were his *******
shall we redefine the human condition
my guru continued via implication
you are tied to your ******
with many rivers to cross it's all a river
float like a butterfly sting like etc.
his heels had wings goat wings
danced merry on their way to work
there's an idea lurking in here somewhere
from the lurking transcendental government
standing guard between the seen and the unseen
try not to bleed so much kids digitize instead
this is a novelty sing along tune
hooted by two adolescent chimps
nearly inaudible due to the sound of
heavy earth moving machinery
the crowd groaned to get the signal
booed him uncompromisingly off stage
he ran into the gloom of fog and introspection
calling taxi taxi taxi in the rain
played all the frequencies at once
could have led to open rebellion
but instead was hailed a master of definitions
please make of it what you wish
since there is nothing left to do
but go bowling on rockabilly night
while madmen comics kept us ROTFLMAO
with astounding feather and glue tricks
so that his work in the aviary could have
a reaching interplanetary dimension
utterly without consequence whatsoever
the ***** press wouldn't touch it
and retired from the drapery business
it's up to us to steer this sucker
down the Grapevine and find parking
where our epic turns right on Main St.
BBQ skewers swished in the starlight
yes he was a romantic and a romanticist
Pushing the Topic up Through the Earth
was the finally finished pamphlet's title
where this goes on the graph
is anyone's guess
take it line by line
of course it was more fun
not being a running target
I am but an orphan foundling sir

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Sep 2023 · 60
Sperm Motility
Walter Alter Sep 2023
nature's way of saying
I love what you do with your tongue
mom used to lick her hanky
to clean my face of imaginary dirt
for this I can only seek revenge
my allies the hobo armies of doom
also want revenge and maybe a banana
now I have a sweet tooth with no answers
for the impenetrable slits of her eyes
the matinee audience was aghast
so I knew we hit the glass jaw
now back to the scheduled program
our man on the scene Swigheart Backhoe
sends this report from Flat, Nebraska
on the next Heads of Kings exhibit
down at the tent city Crusader camp
as we try to figure out why ***** motility
hasn't created a master race yet
The best of millions fighting upstream like
Steelers' running back Don Quixote
over a million years and we still end up with
politicians with red putty noses that go honk
and readers of the Weekly World Snooze
who renew their state of alarm by the minute
we're not one step closer to Kingdom Come for it
***** motility then is as effective an indicator
of Darwinian uber selection
as a chicken on a rotisserie spit
is an indicator of barnyard vitality
you are alive right give yourself a pinch
let's use ***** science to give the 2nd raters
and mediocrities a chance at the brass ova
the modern science of magnification
their committees can certainly arrange for a
shiftless layabout unimaginative spermatozoa
to take a hero's poke at the moon
enough with this Mother Nature swill
put the couch potato, the hysteric
the derelict pants ******* wino *****
up the beanpole and see who salutes
Mother Nature eats her young
and writes fat checks for the
Eugenics Foundation of Savannah, Africa
so does God have someone
telling him what to think
beyond reason most absolutely
they all have the same mouthpiece
so go for it you little tadpoles
get in there you little champions

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Sep 2023 · 43
Your Worst Nightmare
Walter Alter Sep 2023
any superstitious peasants out there tonight
TV junkies gossipy groupies Bulgarian saxophonists
am I talking too fast for couple's therapy
uh oh here it comes another head scar
an optimist would say the scar of opportunity
fortunately digression is an art form
that they say never plays for keeps
you don't want to become the unwitting tool
of smarter people do you
you do
it's your worst nightmare
instead let's play museum
you have eye you have other eye
you will however need an augury
let's step onto the showroom floor
where we have our latest models
Bill the mechanic seer
could tell your fate
from a pile of tossed grease rags
he was right almost every time
he even told 3 circus anteaters
they would run for President
and they did
Edwina the cleaning lady sibyl
could swing a vacuum bag
round her head and tell from the
dust cloud if you were gonna die
from gall bladder or aphrodisiac
Zaza the fabled one trick pony
could hoof the innards of a road ****
and you'd find love
an astronomer named Ziggy
told our planet that a big rock
was coming from the sky
like a runaway freight train
that's why I'm appearing before you
in this ethereal minimum medium
you'll have to forgive me
if I show a lack of enthusiasm
for this dangerous matter
I may have fallen captive to the tow
of the clandestine echelons
working their hands like bug legs
in a sign language that horrifies the deaf
I've scanned this for alien message implants
you won't need a map of area 51
just a chicken wire cage
which is always as refreshing as
another lash of the cane
they just hand me the script
and I broadcast what I'm told
radio free Carthage

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Sep 2023 · 44
Battery Check
Walter Alter Sep 2023
I had better say this before it is too late
and I'm doing a battery check
down at the School of the Americas
badda boom mafia rim shot
the old wisdoms are neo-inadequate
and live in a wilderness of anachronisms
all of them ding **** every sample
even the Arctic and Antarctic ones
he was a swami of pedestrian insights
packaged for the pop psychology latrine circuit
which hasn't got the people smarter faster
buzzard shadows still make the dogs bark
yank their chains free from the Mirage
leaping into my inner sawdust ring
fangs missing the bobbing juggler
a klutz whose eyes see near to nothing
aftermath of daily retinal blitzkriegs
how many optical illusion sacraments
can we fully rid ourselves of
while remaining ambulatory and lucid
like a black widow at the movies
web over the projection hole
******* leggy thing on the screen
making time into the enemy
when it should be the enema
or obsolete as clown paint
and the pet rattlesnake craze
every kid had the memo beaten into him
it's the adrenals vs. the endorphins
both of them a film noir fun house mirror
one with a severe penalty for miscalculation
the other giving us the freedom
to happily destroy our self regard
you need only see the obvious
criminally reckless manhood
hypochondriac womanhood
foretelling the future ain't a big deal
a child with a gun can do it
gun because nobody wants to hear it
apparently we haven't invented
pain free illumination yet
batteries not included
because they are not needed
because we are modifiable
in a good way
by our own hand

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Sep 2023 · 39
Ein Reich Ein Volk
Walter Alter Sep 2023
the vanquished lay screaming
blood dripping all over the tracks
a tale of rank deception
with a maniac at the throttle
and damnation in the boilers
trailing smoke and scrap metal
it became clear to the mindful
you can't stop a train with bodies
it will potato peel your skin off
and noisily eat your liver
while you grok the new data
we squander ourselves daily
at the stadium dome-o-plex
the howling hooligans lusting for blood
and they by jiminy got their fill.
you don't shed time like a layer
the 300 decapitated that preceded me
were prone to outbursts of dire warning
its more than a game for compulsives
they play Russian roulette every dawn
the best of them last 5 days
with resurrection just around the corner
stoic echoic prosaic Prozac
before the world nothing
before your birth nothing
the same old nothing question
his prayer was bless the quiet night
which only got him blasted through
the arbeit macht frei swinging gates
by the Bureau of Infinite Statistics
which obviously didn't want to be
in the modern world anyhow
their disinfectants no longer potent
at the required level of nuance
and the antifreeze froze at room heat
the goblins outside the wire
caught the shrapnel in Jai Alai baskets
glued his shattered remains together
with hammer blows and headbutts
and he could totter on both feet again
not so much affluent as effluent
yet still the luckiest man alive
somebody's mascot apparently
shadow occasionally on the screen
a little less self dialog
said the projectionist
hi res wifi high five he went on
the highest resolution possible
aren't we supposed to get smarter
as fast as we can

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Sep 2023 · 59
Tame Spiders
Walter Alter Sep 2023
she had a mind like a brushfire
ate the testicles of men at a glance
and knew how to foreplay
my weaknesses like loaded dice
Gingiva Racklehaus AKA The Tarantula
had me in a state of moral exhaustion
in an emaciated Assyrian odyssey
laced into the spokes of her chariot
I know she won't always have
the sickle moon *** she has now
and made that scientific analysis known
people who are honest are always in trouble
but I needed her help to get out on parole
having been caught collaborating
with the lead in my pencil
handwriting analysis gave me up
darkness blends with truth
confessing under a barber's hot comb
to nothing but having looked at the stars
you can't put a fence around that
being the only ethical conclusion
I tried a last ditch gambit
but she liked living with a gun to my head
demonstrably much more than I did
because it amuses me is no answer
gimme your brains cowboy
or I'll blow them across the room
she had already cut out my heart
blew it up like a rubber balloon
my prayers did absolutely nothing
and I go shopping for an online exorcist
as it whooshes about the room
upsetting the cat shocking the monkey
and giving the turtle spasms of mania
which for him and his hard umbrella
was a slowly unfolding historic epoch
but I knew who my hard umbrella was
and sent a signal out on Ginger's web
the response was back lickety split
answering the age old question
where do we hide the body
but in plain sight so here I am
I amused her and we married
even a sociopath will enlist
after an *** kicking by the Gods
we're all hungry for a new day after all
so by all means don't **** your TV
leave in on full volume until
the snow makes you smart
failing that give it to someone
who knows how to make it work
to read a civilization's spoor sign

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Sep 2023 · 33
Penile Implant
Walter Alter Sep 2023
being treated for fructose spasms
during one of the last movies on Earth
after the great Enema of 2020
when the heaters were on high
the Emergency Dock crew were called in
but his claims were all backed up
by the logic of chimes and daggers
as he went chatty and personal
diving from couch to chair
on a sponge mop broomstick
the room remained a mess
but the leaps were longer
what but imagination is boundless
so he stamped and splashed singing
through the sewers of ideology
made all my dynamos hum again
thanks to the exponential growth rate
of an adequate knowledge base
but then contemplating death
can make you crazy enough
to assassinate your biology instructor
a prized quality among the really sage
and their many colored appendages
we all know more than we let on
it's a conspiracy of noise and silence
attained through bribery and deceit
where substitutions screech and skid
where sugar cane machetes dance in the rain
and the Moon weeps with a broken heart
made me write on her blackboard 100 times
cognition is not possession
until his soul jumped out his eyeballs
with their lures and scuffles
but then it is in fact a nasty game
played by hungry cartoon caricatures
tricking children out of their candy
where every day and night is Halloween
until the euphoric chameleons
in a ****** garden of delight
of decadence infantilism and sleep
whistle through their nose hairs
beauty is tenuous who is to protect her
awaken her choirs bloom her lilacs
and cascading rainbow tresses
and panting mammaries and
oh **** me dead then where was I
the suction had his mind in a spin
with each gust of wind his forehead
began its evocative dans mort
don't try this at home kids
just kidding its OK to pantomime
ancient actors before their campfire
as you can well imagine

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Sep 2023 · 39
Nation of Narcissists
Walter Alter Sep 2023
fumigated like stockade lice
you Wall St. cologne jockeys
are now 3rd World land fill
recall that consciousness is tuneable
adjust your volume to a comfortable level
because Turette's plus Alzheimer's
is a nation destroying combo
I forgot what I was going to scream
wait oh yeah modernity is inherently outlaw
the chorus began to howl like cats
in Profesor Schrodinger's shoe box
because impressions create personality
there was barking and pulling of hair
their eyeballs spun like casino cameras
I am in your head forever he screamed
and collapsed like a cheeseburger chef
after football day at the griddle
well that was deep as an open manhole
but it hit me like a brakeless gravel truck
that once you admit the voices are yours
you are ripe for mascara ***** extortion
she'll kidnap your mind
and then bitmap your mind
for a little esoteric agenda indoctrination
into the holy tabloid of miracles
that radiate light all around and make
the organist pound like a jackhammer
categories exist before we name them
so let's try to name ones that actually exist
well how Phoenix rising can you get
how on your own can on your own really get
you gotta be educable to survive
that's Darwin plus Microsoft
or else the Army Psyops College
will unleash samurai population control
and you will die hissing blasphemy
like a spike strip *** doll predicting
the end of the cro magnum world
the trick to attaining godhood
is to not try so ******* hard
because adrenaline is a
reduced instruction set
with which high resolution reality
will rip your face off
worse than catching mommy
******* off daddy
for life is short and duty long
drink its venom defiantly
drink it you are going to need it
no need for instincts
in a world of plenty

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 42
Celestial Masochists
Walter Alter Aug 2023
cheer the **** up if you can
nothing cheats the hangman like enthusiasm
since my next act will be
to answer all your questions
as your tenured professor of dyslexia
throw down your canes and spectacles
have faith that blurry is the truth
although it is evident that your blur is
quite distinct from my blur
but it pays off in the election booth
at just the right moment
in just the right amount
lips motorized and on fire
forced to believe your own thoughts
as if they were your own
snicker
now for a word from our sponsor
grab a beer and join the club
after a hard day at the pencil
I like to unwind with a cold bottle of Trapdoor
and enjoy a little engineered cultural amnesia
which is the key to our human condition
doing this with a straight face
which is the key to its condition
praise the miraculous bounty of irony
them dinosaurs should have said
please and thank you more often
might have avoided that extinction
now where the **** were we oh yeah
they've turned being a nervous wreck
into an empath elite vanguard ideology
the most very saddest thing to see
is a human refusing intelligence
on the lookout for the punch line
the wish is mother to the thought
wait there’s more
basically we contain period
and another
evil is bold and bold is a virtue
no brakes
amplify a refusal to hide what you know
no gears
second source every thought
no wheels
yah yah another groin clutching car chase
zany and hysterical in autumn colors
you desire a mechanism
by which to name things incorrectly
and for which there is no cure
as long as nobody reads this
I'll be OK

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 55
Bad Breeding
Walter Alter Aug 2023
The list that was a fist
a) it is possible
b) it is inevitable
chained to a million pleasures
an astonishing compendium of compulsions
honed bright with a fool's ardor
the kind you'd wish for in a comedy script
the land waxing rich with autographs
and other acts of front page humiliation
backwards on the curb with Officer *****
a limited perspective but not without its ironies
blazing trails to metabolic equilibrium
using every crutch and cane there is
in a fanciful play of medieval shadows
colliding with the grace of mosh pit elbows
hell was upon us and none grieved
in statistically relevant numbers
apparently they had finally reached
the bottom of the cosmic barrel
touch something holy once in a while
and mighty Thor will wing above
ah sure right uh huh you bet
needing humor the wires tried to sing
the blades of the switch bit the anode
all is broadcast everywhere right now
on all the boogie woogie coordinates
some curse some utter gratitude
may the good fairy console you
and turn the illusion of warmth
up a little higher on your rheostat
since it hasn't yet been made a crime
to destroy your own mind
and let the foundations of the world
thunder and come apart like cooked meat
but working on the problem
is better than attempting nothing
even if you really don't know
all that you think you know
even if hideously scarred in battle
a terra cotta bust hot from the oven
smelling of sulfur and bruises
tempted by radiance and music
which could get you jailed tonight
so pretend your vision is tunnel shaped
under a curse without an escape clause
in varying pedantic proportions
for another ill coordinated attempted exit
from our dear friend Average and its Law
played to hi fives all around
eventually kindling fires of rebellion
the Metaphor League saw to it

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 46
I've had enough
Walter Alter Aug 2023
I think I'll signal guru Bob
that I've had quite enough
of his implicit stress therapy as he calls it
I've contacted the hunchback ***** banks
for a safe deposit box until I bolt the ashram
with the last flood of disobedience
guru Bob waves his signing stumps
and I go nuts trying to figure out
the message behind the message
which was whatever happens
keep this out of the tabloids
I threw the Studebaker into reverse
and scorched the tires upstate
in order to stop the madness
of hope divided by exctly zero
as the horizon failed to recede
or vice versa being we were in reverse
years from now forensic miners
will stumble upon these passages
and be unsure if this is the he or
the he behind the he somewhat
unable to repair the scrap heap damage
after having been repeatedly ***** trained
by wrecking yard executives with cutting torches
fat as spring worms free like sniffing hyenas
fortunately sugar appears to be universally pleasing
and bought me some time to think
have we gotten to the topology segment
what's wrong with a philosophy of surface
hi what's your sign I'm a capricornucopia
delusion A against delusion B
a cosmic food chain of ransoming angels
I'm just trying my best to avoid
the hell words like cooked and eaten
cooking with Rosetta Stone
eating with zealots and lynch mobs
in the how wide can you talk contest
where the taboo behind the taboo
reverses us to Black Plague status
and the subsequent Violet Plague too
where clouds of flies lurk in church doorways
their buzzing can be infinitely instructive
even if it's the last thing you hear
with a flat rock for a pillow
bless my clumsy adolescence Bob
rosy dawn into evening's umber

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 55
Endless Cruel Laughter
Walter Alter Aug 2023
Sgt. Bedlam of heavy artillery reporting sir
Bedlam I want you to pick the runt of the litter
and turn him into an agent assassin
with the clandestine power of hypnotism
yes Generalissimo I am here to obey
decked out like a burlesque ***** warlord
his Mauser cigar lighter on his belt
a curlicue mustache and a pie tin helmet
Opal his ***** fiend gun moll squirming in his lap
was our banana republic Generalissimo
Bedlam weighed the coming abrasions
concluded we are our scars and furthermore
if adaptation is survival so is parasitism
cleared his throat noisily and bowed an exit
later that fate laden candle lit night
he made a deep study of his globes and charts
Europa Asia Oceania the Steppes the Savannah
the mud slipped scorched Hills of Malibu
a map addict re-educated and re-issued
in the Great Culling of the Herd
his bell-shaped curve insisted love me
server and served a beautiful thing
if one enjoyed giant jungle arachnids and leeches
and centipedes that crawl up your ****
to lay millions of eggs when you sleep
where the laws of physics become
a tumbling burbling retinal stew
geysering steam and sulfur and
an occasional alabaster Venus de Milo
where was I oh yah
yet a thing of beauty was Opal to Bedlam
he heard scratching and purring at the door
it was she incognito in an iguana skin
we must escape this hideous circus of shame
she coo coo rooed as her tongue dove into
the holy fissure in his brain
and he threw caution to the feral hogs
forgetting good posture he oozed upon Opal
I bet you think you make your own decisions
she cloyed and again he tossed caution
into a cauldron of grunting mammalian rut
for several hours perhaps the entire weekend
it's easy to rewire a human
you just give them a little epiphany
and bingo ownership pretty much forevrr
his hypnotic gambit paid off in ducats
the Generalissimo slept like a corpse
the pet centipedes concluded their labors
his ex-kingdom rejoiced at their new liberty
and that's anarchy for ya

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 44
Idee Fixe
Walter Alter Aug 2023
don't even think about it
a bucket of motel ice in the face
proving the thing in itself does not exist
because he registered all the meanings all the time
in a nausea so profound the retching never ended
this being the proof in the pudding
rearranging all my severed proteins
in a hypnotic anarexo-bulemic frenzy
I marched to the beat of crawling flesh
tattooed Celtic blue by an ******* dermatologist
in an idiot if lyrical ritual purification
couldn't find a long-haired dog for winter
settled for an inferno of intrigue and dissipation
in a tin shack at the edge of an endless swamp
it wasn't serenity that's a ******* fact
the horse hairs stung across his ****
Mistress Cheetah grabbed the microphone
she had saved him from pointlessness in the past
weaving many paths upon his terrain
in a fairy tale about fairy tales
fear swept the land as a craving for snacks
the ones who get no peace rose in rebellion
the Brahmins and their bullies faced extinction
so they cut a deal to escape the cro magnon hordes
coldly calculating the cost to nations
in a curious mix of apoplexy and daring
a grandiose epic on the nature of Nature
and the desert of human intellect
clanked and hummed into bloom
an infectious enthusiasm swept the palisades
curing the sick and raising the dead
bypassing the humiliation of needing to lie
now if that doesn't please your ghost
here's something that will
I'll give you the formula now
in a dance of erupting minutae
if the West is decadently feudal
the East is feudaly decadent
this is my message to Earth
multiply yourself by yourself
and avoid counterfeit soothsayers
like you avoid a broken pin ball flipper
some of the angels are stuffed dolls
where everyone is a game piece
tell me what is not measured
like wild geese honking through the night
part of a vast migration of souls
with the moon low and full
in a time of riches and knowing
in a teasing ****** of ignorance
in a power surge that spiked through the wires
the closer to the pillar you stood
the more transparent it all became
end of transmission

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 41
3-D Printout
Walter Alter Aug 2023
it ain't the gush of hot blood
or a madman’s teeth ripping open
a bag of chips and a microbrew
it is a clenched heart squeezed
by feral anteaters in the Age of Steam
then left at the century's doorstep
following the great migration
of Cimmerians to Penemunde
said the monkey to the parrot
we’ll cut away from our intro now
just didn't want the intergalactic
Mind Police Black Dog Terror Squad
to think I had forgotten their food dish
hence the esophageal spasm
it's all a gateway to paradise
where Lake Placid erupts in flame on cue
I assure you posthumously volcanically
presumed dead still twitching
possibly a victim of hypochondria
needing humanitarian relief
hell what do I know
you got your inductive
you got your deductive
one leads to vacillation
the other to megalomania
I watched the best minds of my generation
lobotomize themselves with ideology
and lop their nuts off with paper cutters
less out of vengeance than mitigated tranquility
journalists were the first to go
many ifs in the Thesaurus of Legends
you see the words
you spectate pleasantly
inconsequential and obsolete
separated from the five senses
by the five in-between senses
sense of irony sense of outrage
sense of monotony sense of wonder
sense of mediocrity
and a great list of impermissibles
as long as your extended elbow
with curiosity the test of courage
discovering that the path of least aversion
was sweet to gaze upon
in a universe of distortions
this is a level 5 commando alert
follow me men he drunkenly commanded
and stumbled out into the darkness
cursing and singing
singing and cursing

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 45
Satan's Catechism
Walter Alter Aug 2023
so easy to speak of suffering and love
so instead we'll speak of
the one body many minds problem
it is the wisdom of pain
vs. the wisdom of pleasure
vs. the wisdom of extinction
the greater the risk the greater the risk
I flunked out of school school
so my dice are perpetually on the fly
presently writing the final flaming chapter
you will recall from your history texts
that there is a describable form of data
which controls the description of all other data
which is shining above like the Milky Way
you can pet my **** now
then a voice booms out
from everywhere at once
with an intensity that is preposterous
preposterous now there's a word
that needs no introduction
marry into money son
don't Van Gogh that ear son
get the best set of maps
your set of maps can provide son
that finishes our emergency broadcast
it's all in post production special effects
lots of zoom in and out simultaneously
plane to plane projection the pure stuff
none of that cheap point to surface
no sir not for my minions of desecration
the evidence is way too flimsy
to change the modern direction anyhow
then I did some number crunching
and took a ride on Godzilla's foot
loaded my pants with explosives
took out two day shift checkout aisles
and a Starry Night mall fountain mosaic
before they punched my ticket
drugged gagged and bound
thrown at the jury's unwashed feet
BTW the sickness of modern society
is in fact the previous society
but the reasons for not writing
are the same reasons for writing
we'll come up with something
every night is karaoke night

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 42
Molecule Soup
Walter Alter Aug 2023
he waived cross examination
innovation had suffered a ******* head wound
and the Mossad was after my ***
a post Ragnarok pre Utopia picnic
with a cozy camp fire on the ice
hot enough to fry a penguin steak
code breakers grab your lapiz lazuli
it's the Florentine Colonnade Dancers
and gravy covers the spuds
the beaten man fears to drink his fill
swallowed the shiny faucet handle
in a messy near suicide by drowning
tried to live on borrowed time
and die a minor hero with a minor following
followed by a banquet of boneless chicken
and seven times seven bags of Cheetos
we are all either the ruling class
******* things up for generations to come
or clowns in the cross hairs
because they are still here aren't they
megalomania may well be a survival mechanism
where the ******* Adonises are grown
with a suspected core of infinite malice
the gatekeeper only wants to know your symptoms
my life was a waste of time I replied
words being contours as well as baskets
I screamed turning up the gain
with them we explore the human psyche
like branch monkeys swinging in a cage
I sang because it's the smart thing to do
since I never learned to spell i-m-p-e-r-i-a-l
as I rambled onwards and zoomed in
thank you one and all and everything
and I grouted my stones with a la la la
while the streets filled with rubble
a vast line of gate crashers not waiting
dinner forks ready bye m'bye eatum
a final exit from the crazy maze
it was the best he could honestly do
even when they upside us like **** *******
up one side and down the aether
he dodged the repo man one more time
with the compass of compassion
while trying not to be a morale problem
the specimens in my cognitive laboratory
confide and call it symphony
yet in the end the neurons
played a starring role
trying to stir from the trance
he knew the risk
but had a mouth to feed

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 41
Search String
Walter Alter Aug 2023
this will be good and slippery
in a whistling fall from grace
feel free to edit in a picture of your choice
the more grotesque the more accurate
while glancing at your wrist watch
over and over when you knew
your 30 seconds was up centuries ago
we agree to be controlled
he said speaking in archetypes
here then is my plan for world conquest
say Bob that was some intro
abssolutely right you are Nick
and just what the tired evacuated
non combatants at home needed
you know Bob our audience should be issued guns
right you are Nick the results would be immediate
h-h-h-howdy there f-f-fans
g-g-glad to see you all  p-p-packin'
ha ha ha ha ha good one Bobs
who does your thinking for you by the way
OK you've been briefed
if I wrote as few words as possible
the page would be blank
and useless as a postmodern hit man
speculating on the utility of spectacles
driven by a fear of the ordinary
in an off the shelf ideological trance
at this point it could go either way
even reality is an approximation of reality
but there is no question of stopping
onward he plunged sarcastically
into a semiotic twilight of the gods
everything red shifted in a bar stool curse
too many crevasses on this ice berg
blinded by white phosphorous
receptors wide open overt and undeniable
incorrect labeling why is it a necessity
would you know your number
if your number was up
he stood before his firing squad
snickering and giggling and rolling his eyes
got a last cigarette
I have to smoke I'm a witch
the squad broke up with laughter
****** their pants
and shot the lieutenant
if I'm in this much trouble now
God help me tomorrow

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 39
God is Dad
Walter Alter Aug 2023
dialog with myself invariably involves others
we are all perceivers nobody escapes
no really and truly trust me on this
no manufacturing of childish evasions
maybe it is best to be born into a family
able to generate family values
ablaze with comfort and sanitation
lost in a forest of memories
amusingly arrayed for shoppers
exactly like the TV version
fortunately I was in touch
with my inner juvenile delinquent
unlettered by any known normalcy
nor crazed by the expectation of gold
or even gold paint from a rattle can
our default addiction to pleasure
is no random Darwinian accident
we really do learn to act from movies
no really and truly trust me on this
our tune is a complicated little number
bassooned in several keys at once
upon your mother's pedestal is one of them
between cognition and reflex is another
in the clue farm keyhole universe
I may need an ax to free my thoughts
just so I can play dumb
in a trail blazing effort to avoid
media suppression by the CIA
the Clairvoyant Intelligence Agency
chronically in for interrogation
OK let's play who's more paranoid
if this poem is minus the above line
then it has been tampered with
a million hand sewn Humpty Dumpty
vital nerve connections later
sutured like Frankenstein's test dummy
a bungee cord full of existential tension
I seem to be strapped to a microscope
behavior can also be modified
by better info if you let it
how's that for mind warfare
pretty propaganda pretty pretty
for the young and the innocent
left screaming in a gas station toilet
wrapped in today's newspaper
comics section puzzle page
how long can the charade continue
when autonomous is still an illegal word
this is an audience participation piece
from the Federal Pencil Council
and for the terminally nostalgic
the night arched quietly above

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 34
Bum Fight
Walter Alter Aug 2023
you have such a good mind
why waste it on the next ten minutes
in the grand tradition of spiritual vagrancy
OK then another merry Sterno Christmas
wedged under any freeway overpass
the drunker you get the better I look
some of my best friends are antonyms
granted my thoughts have been poisoned
but by my own semi-hinged family
the stars are bright out here
you can hold them in your palms
they can make you howl like a lobo
loping across the radio tracks
on the outskirts of Zenith Arizona
both ambidextrous and symmetrical
a well recognized dangerous combo
there were silver bullet gunshots that night
and he lay in a pool of moral stupor
wondering what could be better to desire
what might make us more intelligent
could only be answered adequately with
try to carry the weak until they are strong
and shape your clay to get us to the next step
on the desert paradise lecture circuit
ready to sermonize you purple
be sure to bring your snakebite knife
a lot of reptile men out there
and six inch long insects
never mind give me subway crime
it's not the ****** banality of evil
it's the functioning persistence of evil
being a ******* survival attribute
pressing in from all sides
rest your ******* easy lad
teach yourself sanity nobody else will
but at least he could divide
the ground from the sky
connect a few of the zillion dots
knew that death was inconceivable
cursed the day he was initiated
into prehensile Neanderthal wonderment
next I'll probably be hearing from
the Neanderthal Liberation Front
Godzilla stamped out 17 cities
before they invented the Z-Ray
turns every molecule in your body
into hypochondria and pop therapeutics
it was as deep as he got
into a most case scenario

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 41
Rumor Has It
Walter Alter Aug 2023
to say that rumor has it
is to say that the World Trade Center
collapsed silently and cleanly like
oppositely sexed Siamese twins
who discovered they could mate
I had all channels going full bore
aiming at involuntary insemination
with the aid of a two-handled clam rake
now there's an archetype of malevolence
just how many categories are there anyhow
an infinity an eternity you decide
rumor has it on very good authority
There may be more than one infinity
however eternity is but an extrapolation
of the next easy 10 minutes
who would want to spend it only there
a money robot trapped in labor
dead in a puddle of break time ****
insert your domain name here
a world gone heavily annotated
yearning for the dagger of love
whine your last you holy landlords
at a time when rent is the anomaly
where anomalies are just signals
this isn't a broken-hearted paperback
or a lightning burn to the head
the big eye on the horizon says
he's trying to mathematically figure out
how far to take the next extinction
but is unsure whether to come to us again
as a mystic sophist or a yodeling yokel
we've come out of the dark place
into the frozen lips dimness
looking for aids to navigation
having discovered the secret entrance
clues were left everywhere
let's hope it ends with clean sheets
because I just found out my guardian angel
is a rottweiler with a missing leg
and just as many teeth
one eye is a ball bearing
the other a shotgun barrel
loaded with pillow mints
he rides a mean skateboard
propelled across a landscape
of food and *** smells
no wonder I'm on the run
from my very own mother

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 36
Very Pale
Walter Alter Aug 2023
not in the heart again
for chrissakes it's like Swiss cheese already
he was off his medication as usual
far too much work for a dead end
saw his only ally in the embalmers needle
left his innards spilled in a compost bucket
several dueling scars graced his genitals
history in its entirety mocked his comprehension
had the nation in tears and then nauseous
if our perceptions already lie why shouldn't we
with that as a pathway to relaxation I had to laugh
even after a thousand years of AI research
the electronic government was helpless
resembling nothing so much as a delusion factory
alternatives to logic 101 with Prof. Spike
my latest version Microsoft forehead radiator
absolutely charmingly couldn't get any focus
but the Royal Society of Blind Philosophers
helped me with my little problem
because our endorphin soup is a bit thin
the quicksilver cooks ate first and fell asleep
having thrown their brains into the broth
during the air raid sirens of postmodernity
in the field kitchen of the gods
can there ever be too little truth
for an army of blood diamond wholesalers
now a bit more about paraelectrics
if only I were at liberty to discuss it
yes imprecision can carry signal
but the place is crawling with dilettantes
justifiably taken for a pack of fools
glibly wearing their secret **** plugs
it's a guessing game as you can see
petitioning for a visual diagram idiom
a devilish seesaw but let us restart
then the sun went down
and never came up again
as he stepped into the stone circle
chanting evidence is preferable
to the leaning moonlit tombstones
signal drifting drifting drifting
to all minds great and small
and smaller and smaller
the Internet is the yearned for Messiah
there it's done and out and not to be unseen
you wrestle with it while I proceed
dashing among startled commuters
their dictatorship of x-ray leeches
tossed him out of several monasteries
never met his production quotas
in a kaleidoscope of normalcy
howdy do nail in my shoe

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 51
Cowboy Logic
Walter Alter Aug 2023
He was a cowboy problem child
rescued by a mendicant sage brush sorcerer
resulting in his remembering everything
flawlessly insolently permanently
birth death life things in space have a beer
owner of his own head at last
thanks to whiskey tainted improvisations
and the use of springs and levers
in order to bring the Almighty down to earth
for a patch job on his many severed reveries
he slept on a bed of maguey spines
combed his tumbleweed hair over the burn spots
and tattooed his many and fecund scars into
the outlines of zippers and pockets
Tex Lester was a lariat twirling minstrel
and undefeated Popsicle stick swordsman
subject to a chronic howling for *******
Tex took me under his leathery wing
together we praised the pop up toaster
and often spoke of mechanics and luck
taught me to look at girls all anew
in the little red school house by the cactus patch
Miss Lobowski beat off my attempts
at ******* her leg during her class in ethics
as if a description of total damnation
could repair the broken mosaic of attention
Tex would implore with the tact of a scorpion
madam cover your eyes in the name of decency
what could I do but wake the dead
and digress distressingly in the dirt
a heartfelt rain making non-sequitir
well kids are full of surprises
uninhibited by mystery and murderous rage
completed by a delightfully unsubtle curiosity
but the more Miss Lobowski's convex mariachis
bucked and danced under her wet serape
the more it popped into Tex's ten gallon head
to teach her an old cowboy rope trick
round and round went his cowboy lariat
the desire to repeat pleasure unfortunately
is the desire to repeat it exactly endlessly
and that's the problem the big problem
at the museum of horrible deaths
you grab their ears and whisper
rest your head on a cloud angel
and hope they don't end up on top
of a truckload of flattened automobiles
Tex went mockingbird on her sensoria
let loose his Gila Monster on her panting ****
and together they began robbing banks
this is going to cost me my diploma
Aug 2023 · 60
Surveillance Camera
Walter Alter Aug 2023
I need to sell this Caddy to the Cardinal
and get my lifelong harbinger mood swing
out from the wilderness of oblique directives
written with the strident ***** of Satan
shaking money from my pockets again
like they do in Burmese shadow theater
where the container is the contained
trying to let it miss your attention won't fly
because we obstinately index the cornucopia
in a total lack of continuity all at once
with a pigeon tongue spoken in barter
fit only for bouncy news anchor banter
pancake makeup a bit too aflame
like the Great Blazing Spiral in the Sky
his mind a bordello of interpretation
memes eating his soul like red worms
only my degree from the School for the Sickly
standing tolerably vigilant between me
and the dervish nuns of St. Manacle
doing their Plantation Branding Iron Dance
for chopped liver epicures at the Bank of Winter
conniving with the demented to create a better world
living dead men's dreams like a second skin
he hated coercion like he hated licorice
his collective unconscious operation manual
tossed on the burn pile half a life ago
going from syntactically correct to uncooked
in infinitesimal quantities with a Nefertiti smile
perpetually enthused by the mystery of tomorrow
just don't try to tell me how to move my eyelids
barely able to walk after the derision of linguists
lobbed horseshoes across my barricades
on a search and destroy mission
and that's space for you
beginning with  the rank elements
God is not dead he is passe etc.
nature is unquestionably to be leashed etc.
a raised by wolves feral non-conformist
everything orbits everything else
which will bend yer crank kid
tried quoting Lenin but it was too easy
the proletariat is people in a pickle
the dueling cucumbers of class warfare
it was a kosher Pentecost event
now I'm on a dozen watch lists
followed by Diana's paparazzi
to this claustrophobic cinemaplex
and its temporal artery of light
at 3 o:clock in the afternoon
a good cheap remedy
following a bad diagnosis

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Walter Alter Aug 2023
Act 2
both sides use conscience for a hook
it's a con artist's suitcase
fill your cup in the Ocean of Tears
there's enough of everything in there
toasters glowing blenders humming
dogs ******* on lawns across the land
in a cloying oppressive sweetness
that could diverge and go anywhere
Club Med’s Oracle Island for example
blind sibyls eyelids fluttering
hissing spitting twitching babbling
it was the wisdom of the ages incarnate
but Bobby was miles from all this
making that fox up a tree deduction
consumed by a lingering half lit dread
of discovering at the moment of death
that his life was an in-flight movie
only with less captivity and more wandering
unsure of coming up with an airtight alibi
he suddenly mobilized his only shield
the lid off the dustbin of history
held against his approaching doom
they give you anything you want at first
the customer can do no wrong
then the high pressure hose
and subsequent foxhole autopsy
great 3 color graphics
they even have a screen saver
yet Fate had a trick up her ****
plucky LeMona it suddenly turns out
as the machinery of Zeus grinds us skyward
has been a spy for the forces of ambivalence
disguised as a bushwhacking retromaniac
gone undercover and surfing the channels
that were woven into the Swami's beard
from the first instant that she knew
the Eel King was a candle lit hallucination
as well as a groping spiritual vagrant
don't you **** with Bobby Eel daddy
it was LeMona and her retinal retinue
of petulant maidens on a magic carpet
Jacobins in Mr. Roger's neighborhood
the boardroom's feral chessmen
puking up last night's takeover
I mean takeout for the 6th time
uh oh I'm getting calm down messages
from my fiance LeMona Oblongata
so I can't even feel illustrious at last
I've been inoculated against everything except
the Eel King's daughter

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Walter Alter Aug 2023
Act 1
a notarized copy of this testament
is on file with my attorney
in case of my untimely earthing
by the invisible x-ray background
driving another stake through my bleeding heart
but back to our semiotically comatose narrative
The Eel king rips off Bobby's latex facade
at last I have you captive Bandwidth
Eel's eyes narrow a smile edges his mandible
Bobby's eyes gone wide with no exit
prepared to submit to his conspicuous doom
humid vistas from the Matto Grosso
panned luridly before his convulsing eyes
ars pharmacopia little muffin went Eel
the time has come for your loving torment
Bobby was dragged to the Cistern of Woe
by a busload of nuns from Santa Pudenda
and tied into one of Escher's inhibition pretzels
above a pit of staring human eyeballs
Bobby had a plan murky at first
but with a blurred urgency that unveiled
his guardian cosmetician's skin graft
from the last 3 alarm conflagration epic
it had finally healed abused and maligned
tho still on oxygen or was it toxigen
no one knew much less the narrator
too harried by Fate for detail work
but I digress to a distressing degree
Bobby stared into the cesspool of his mind
illumined now by a wan spark of hope
he would gambit judiciously
the ancient and terrible pherome defense
as the squish of rain forest footsteps
and little gasps of manual stimulation
graced with wanton overtones came closer
it was LeMona the Eel King's daughter
a beauty that all the aniline dyes in the jungle
could not extinguish in a waterfall's fog
marched with retinue straight up to Bobby
he was instantly and cleanly detrousered by
her wheezing steam engine of debauchery
within microseconds seconds her tongue
was down his throat to the car park
he heard the bell in her navel ringing
and went limp like a doomed weasel
in the talons of a swooping Mongolian bercut
the Eel King became visibly ill humored
contain your infantile carnality
mischievously insistent pride of my *****
(to be continued)

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 38
Queen Anne's Revenge
Walter Alter Aug 2023
wishing he had sung his prayers last night
from both ends to the middle
fell to the ground in supplication
plastic Jesus hold my head
a round of applause for once
or even just a soft murmur
from those in your employ
my interrogator professor Zworykin
said quietly we want information
I knew I was up **** creek
without an assault rifle
with various blunt objects
aimed at what was left of my head
initiations with disfigurement
so give me a melodic answer he encouraged
yah well the Third ***** fell from bad music
I regurgitated like a vampire in reverse
furthermore the swelling is an obstacle
I added for emphasis I mean evidence
Zworykin was neither mollified
nor inclined to use less aftershave
a great ****** of a situation
which is a poem in itself
I got in a few imaginary hits
before he called in the hockey franchise
fine fellows who sang as they worked
that's how we laugh the day away
in the merry merry Land of Oz
always a help to morale in the trenches
men this is a spit shine day went Zworky
cracking walnuts with his hydraulics
stand ***** and do your regimentation proud
they wavered then cheered then wavered
when the going gets tough as it will
look for a bar with a jukebox
as does your present prostrate narrator
to whom they ultimately allocated
a very private security consultant
good lord not another eccentric botanist
endorphin soaked and bling speckled
with his blemish free goats
and his tunnel vision paparazzi
hi I'm Joe Product family friend
half con half circus half fury
I screamed my one line in the play
traffic fines double in poet zones

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 39
Crazy Glue
Walter Alter Aug 2023
can't even **** anymore
without kicking up a hurricane
halfway around the Earth
according to reports this has occurred
at a great loss of life and mind
within minutes of the methane
the dominoes began to rumble
and poor Flash who was
merely greeting the morning sun
became history's first flatomaniac
Flash was burly with hair
up and down his back like
a mink in a 5th Avenue perfumery
he had always been a cartoon
playing the 3 color hope card
in a séance with the laboring masses
at the Union of Opposites hiring hall
I was merely giving the citizens
an anatomy lesson your Honor
I should be given a cash stipend
for ennabling public elucidation
fortunately no witness has come forward
his only defense was the tenuous claim
that he saw the ancient god Apollo
leaping out of a moving taxi
the effect was so dramatic
that his legs had to leap too
they haven't stopped since
his testimony was a monstrosity of detail
in conclusion my rebuttal established
several seemingly salient selections
I am a dissector by trade your Worship
and a taxpaying asset to any community
Flash was sentenced with stern admonishment
you will henceforth exercise your libido
within the confines of spherical propriety
to which Flash meekly assented
without the slightest ******* er objection
and somehow strangely unafraid
the Flasher of Costa del Mar
disappeared one star sprinkled night
****** into the belly of an alien craft
over the cattle lip badlands of Montana
they commenced their hideous experiments
as Flash mused without anesthesia
on the incalculable immensity
of the scrapyard Universe
and watched a mobile home run amok
across 9 lanes of traffic

From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Walter Alter Aug 2023
there are some parts of your personality
you must never be charmed to look at
or Aristotle's logic will pay you a visit
for a 15th century anatomy lesson
an eye for an eye a throat for a throat
gargoyle armies hovering overhead
tongue for tongue trumpeting victory
the oracle had him tossed out
for vigorously offensive behavior
his cult believed that *** withers the bones
madman Rasputins rerouted his mail
how could work ever be its own reward
a case of geriatric illumination
following the high voltage enema
and you learn that by reading the context
you can actually see around corners
it was a code 9 ambulance ride
straight to Happy Valley’s neuro dock
and thousand dollar an hour shrinks
for libido boot heel therapy
with the Empress of all the Russias
please to open mouth dahlink she said
and drove her turgid tongue
down my gagging throat so far it broke off
just make it significant she keened
so he wrote like he lived diminishingly bold
aggressively non-committal engagingly witless
a composite man with a cryptographic message
for the pivoting dervish temple ballerinas
and big breasted truck stop girls
vacationing in Puerto Aorta
you take a cliche you massage it right
you got them eating out of your laundry bag
my Tourette's script writers again
all you can say to truth is
I hope you ain't the whole truth
Aristotle addressed the basilica
as a shaft of light shone down
the gathered sweaty once devoted throng
expecting a thrash metal anthem
murmured and stamped their discontent
and walked out in stony silence
Aristotle was immediately defenestrated
by the Bishop of all the Americas
having **** uncontrollably
and aggressively upon the altar
while uttering the plague curse
from the Plague House of Nineveh
a wanton unrepentant savagery
such as seen in certain Pekingese lap dogs
a masterful mix of indifference and cunning


From "Pageant of Naked Mischief" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 45
Tormens Humanum
Walter Alter Aug 2023
i finally established rapport
with none other than the Sacred Cow
and it stepped all over my toes
gave me a limp worthy of an asterisk
the oil of anointment in my crankcase
but an army of monks couldn't keep me pure
as I laugh all the way to the blank
pulled into a marginally enchanting future
by the dog at the end of my food chain
pet his good luck **** if you must
my Siberian sibling exhales belligerently
after exterminating the woolly mammoth
separated at birth by a faulty wall socket
badly trained by a monkey's uncle
I've contacted the hunchback ***** banks
for a below zero safe deposit box
while descending through the atmospherics
with a certified license to lounge
upon the bedrock of creation
like butter through hunger
only in your head holy man
expletives erupted from his throat
making antic come here gestures
while wiggling under Bigfoot's foot
a sea of irritants sending messages
through my lawyers Rugburn & Nosebleed
you vampires should be in bed at this hour
if only because monotony generates subtlety
we played 'em right into the net
sent the boys off on a Nanking holiday
to animate something foul and oafish
that's now clogging the sewers
**** the spankers slit their throats
like the moon through a windy fog
one thing blending into another
fueling up with ignorance again
but I don't see how we could wreak hell
any more than the universe
already buggering ahead does
even with bear claws for hands
like a hotel banquet ice carver
in an encounter with the Dancing Strumpets
in a climate too tropical for inspiration
his frozen uncertainty runneth over
in a renunciation of befuddlement
by a Viking landfall pillaged soul
living a farcical incoherent nightmare
slammed through the one chance gate
and went clomping into showbiz
with a gypsy clan of Yiddish fiddlers

From "Engine of Didactic Beauty" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 25
Missionary Money
Walter Alter Aug 2023
educated by the ancient twin mystics
of misfortune right eye and left eye
to nurture in nature a desire for beauty
and sweet self astonishment
can't perceive without perceiving
music of the spheres for dummies
the elderly should be smarter than they are
being close to death and all
instead the investigator discovers
a massive construction of leashes
not even the angry wish monsters
can cut them loose and free
being elderly in form I have but one wish
women throw your bodies on me
Fallopia Prestwich was all over me
like cat fur on a velvet couch
it looks like my cheap suit cologne
apparently got between her legs
but I was done with her abstract threats
of revenge litigation and outright damnation
she was a circus muse who untrained horses
she could pitch a dime up a hopping toad's ***
her beauty left me speechless
fortunately for my many invisible readers
I was not also left writeless
the assignment was simple and brilliant
to assess the capacity of all humanity
to put therapeutic levels of luminosity
into their daily thrill ride
yah but what is it really other than
a figure 8 demolition derby
a merciless war of the hormones
the pedants conning the pedestrians
then the animator of all that there is
rolls up and gives me a bumper push
to the Brickpile checkered flag
even though I refuse to believe
his ******* tale of redemption for a price
do this do that don't think just do
bring me the head of Calliope
and we'll open her blessed plenum
well I rebelled and continue to do so
consequently here's a big kiss on the lips
for all the young Pioneers of the Soviet Union
anything named pioneer can't be all bad
and here's a big dog lick in the ear
for every Rabbi Mufti Priest and Magus
who thought they had the truth in a cage
stick this target over your ***
simple rational practical elegant
now send me some ******* missionary money

From "Engine of Didactic Beauty" available on Amazon
Walter Alter Aug 2023
beware the enemy who can
**** your national anthem
it was a mob scene at the microphone
**** him **** him they laughed
nobody wanted to miss the show
a perfect blend of pandemonium and bliss
sound bites took their ears off
but how else can one enter the future
with enough for gas money
a basket of Chinese takeout
and a cigar for the road
I wasn't free as a kid either
trying to live happy with an unhappy soul
we're going to be a brave scout
aren't we my little muffin
the place was crawling with dilettantes
**** pederasts and machine politicians
parents now hunkered down and on the run
from the children bounty hunters
this is the era of retribution
officer Claudia held her gun on him
I need as a minimum a fat 8 inches
can we do business she murmured
OK I'll take achoo as meaning yes
wishing only to stay true to my vow
keep a poker face no matter what
certainly I know right from wrong officer
having tested them both thoroughly
under laboratory conditions of course
on the normal frequencies
it seemed to do the trick
bought me another half minute
in the midnight  arcade of illusions
where it's all a trick of light because
light is the judgement of proof
all is rumored is a good disclaimer
when faced with the prospect of
another night of sinister symbols
broadcast across my glued shut eyes
in a Japanese ******* tourist accident
I'd like to make a withdrawal
from my camera account now
so life is an insane riddle then
watching the steam pipes blow
watching the manhole covers blow
so if right and left marry
will their kids have two heads

From "Engine of Didactic Beauty" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 71
Cosmic Shoeshine
Walter Alter Aug 2023
this one goes out
to all you habitual symbolphrenics
style monsters invading the me precinct
bow only before your own image
for we are each a TV studio
selling loneliness as a communal experience
find the station that lets you
find all the other stations
or play dumb and ride your rocket cycle
like there's no other traffic
so hey kids let's learn something new
and dine with the revolution
the information revolution you sod
being deaf to the tea kettle not an option
2-D carcass straight to your door
in a two lane blacktop sun baked minute
best haute cousine squealing wheels can buy
have a beer relax put your feet up
recall that consciousness is tuneable
so tune in to my next act which will be
to answer all your pregnant questions
and awaken you to the fairy tale kingdom
hail the King and his syphilis
smelling of chainsaw oil and circus sawdust
make you ***** up your existence tax
with really huge detector molecules
a Macy's Parade of lighter than air daydreams
from whence gallop in a clatter
the harassing Fusiliers of Wrackworm
sputtering judgmental patriarchs
maniquinkind doomed and destroyed
a colorful example of paintball diplomacy
his only safety was the anchovy hunters
were never as numerous as their prey
the indecisive semioticians could
**** with that for hours wink wink
because this is all highly experimental
and nerve wracking inquisitional
your reward for coughing in the theater
did you get the message
wink wink light the fuse and run
because what you don't know can
explode your viscera with surprise
never apologize to or for yourself
pain is not a higher nerve path
touch your finger to your temple
and smile like a Cheshire tabby
whose tuba nesting playpal mice
belch nobly alongside the elephants
the customer can do no wrong

From "Engine of Didactic Beauty" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 48
Masters of Trickery
Walter Alter Aug 2023
alien ornithopters filled with pilgrims
sliding into snoring bedrooms
under a buzzing fluorescent moon
hubcap jockeys from artless galaxies
firing bursts of compressed methane
in wanton hypnotic quantities
ended civilization as we know it
the survivors reel in stupor
the land is barren its people wail
our women ******* exclusively
our men drool and **** themselves
except for a number of mathematicians
and barflies who did that anyhow
whoever said exile makes you smart
was a master of trickery and deceit
why did their science get them this far
then break down into useless tin
replacement parts are on the way
OK you can drive it just don't touch Turbo
well he did and became one of the new gods
commanding the involuntary muscle groups
and sundry media of mass communication
Koko the notorious hand sign gorilla
was his consecrated High Priestess
Koko want play peek-a-boo
discovered anarchy all by herself
using those prehensile wiggly digits
to construct a portable explosive device
but permanganate and peanut butter
must be mixed slow and her impatience
was set to fast so it went off in her face
leaving Koko beautiful as Aphrodesia
disarmed by wit charmed by unreason
a miracle of chaotic reconstruction
when all she wanted for her head
was a song and dance tetrahedron
proving that existence is open source
the alien visit had been productive
many messages were left with us
could time have a center
asked the almond eyed pilot peevishly
only peevish for him was rip your head off
and didgeridoo down your windpipe
according to recently extracted data
it looks like we all suffer from
the groping menace of
gambler's syndrome

From "Engine of Didactic Beauty" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 49
Amphetamine Lazarus
Walter Alter Aug 2023
An intriguing little crime scene
we have here eh Inspector Marsupial
a freeway overpass ******'s
cardboard box and mattress
and a paperclip necklace
juxtaposed on a dissecting table
at some point of logical confluences
a losing strategy has to be examined
even if squeamishly concluding
that we are here to be punished for being here
Marsupial searched his pachinko readout
acting on the assumption that
in at least one setting perhaps this one
he could juggle us a grand total
even if the light was sub visible
which you don't see every day
bottom line blame enough to go around
manipulators of fear with a plan
is there anything in us that is inviolate
he was a master of pedestrian insights
with a repertoire of a priori assumptions
packaged for the pop psych tabloids
his mouth flapping like a puppet on a string
the official Government spokesman
for the natural state of man
comrades these are troubled times
but not like before
during the really troubled times
so relax it’s an alchemist's contraption
made from bed springs and alarm clocks
proletarian gyro-chemistry in action
every atom wanting to go its own way
the problem with categories is that
some manage to obliterate the others
the fruit festooned banana daiquiri
had apparently reached his thalamus
clean your spoon son that's government chow
and so began the long loud logomania
you have before you now
my rabbi assures me this is therapeutic
inductive in deductive out
forehead wrinkles along for the ride
knowing what is out of place
dawn and the bust of Aristotle
juxtaposed upon a cactus throne
shoot me I said juxtaposed again
it's no longer a festival of consensus
last I checked slapstick is still dead
I'm pretty sure everything
can be described by numbers
there are enough of them for the job
wheel chairs killed the fashion show

From "Engine of Didactic Beauty" available on Amazon
Walter Alter Aug 2023
his eyelids conclude why bother
manacled they led him away
to the red beating heart of their city
in his mud brick cell they tried everything
cattle **** fire hose blow dryer
ineluctable forces of nature
now there are wires in his head
his neo-cubist portrait
ended up on bags of dog food
have you seen this child
we make too many monsters
for the safety of this planet
a petting zoo of pretty spiders
eager to charm uneager to learn
ever-ready to change the subject
claiming that this is the normal milieu
leaping from euphemism to euphemism
preconceptions luridly arrayed
detour around the temple kids
there’s mobsters in heaven
they don't tell you that but it is true
they run the gambling arcade of faith
the will he or won’t he tables
it should be clear by now that
prayer does not ward off plague
even for the willfully superficial
should we all be capable of greatness
or blind credulity you decide
behold the broadly entangled universe
in all its partly comprehensible splendor
the design that stuns with perfection
and then kills you so slowly
that your DNA begins to tell you
how when and what to think
it couldn't be more or less blatant
drifting in the eddies of a potential thing
in which the big impossibility happened
at least we know how to know more
stray as you wish into the arms of beauty
and rub against her silks and furs
make her mumble the irony the irony
her paranoia may be an entrance
but live for today is a sham
and a shuck and a jive
because tomorrow always comes
this is a mathematical given
the human condition
used to be specified as lost
now at least it’s curious

From "Engine of Didactic Beauty" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 78
Painful Erection 911 Call
Walter Alter Aug 2023
litany of the Church of the Ecstatic Coma
I was playing pinkie dinkie
with next door Suzie Woozy
her father was a CIA spy catcher
with a big spy catcher mitt
try not to leave town he warned
you are someone's project
come here Sweetchops she coos
you get your molasses rubdown today
I sizzled like a Siberian shashlik
skewered with the awe in awkward
their witchy priestess had smoked me out
her tongue slid down to my sternum
the boys from Central Scanning drooling again
going all area focus on the ****** pixels
her teats were wheels of fortune
I had no choice but to place my bet
You're quite attractive I lied
I've heard it before she lied
at that point it could go either way
what else can you show me she teased
having hesitated too long I went for the guts
I wanted take out she wanted road ****
let's do it daddy-o she tugged
and plunged a foot of sharpened rebar
into my 3rd eye
this is your song she hissed
her hips slowly grinding coffee
a Gobi princess half horse half bowstring
ten ****** on her team as a handicap
like Venus disarmed by wit
horrifically stuffy may I and do you mind
threw me to the rabid chihuahuas
guarding the Temple of Loud Delights
the other church goers heard the commotion
I immediately checked my utensil
and the dish ran away with the spoon
to the Babylonian nuns of St. Thuggurash
protectors of women on bar stools
gave their coyote yell and he was cured
of his ****** extravaganzas
no more dancing harlots and magicians
no more leg ******* the Delphic Floozie
counseling instead Chinese all you can eat
with a band of handy mandarins
their cleavers gleaming
asleep at the foot of his bed
a plate of pasta for a pillow
avanti il populo
**** the menace go play

From "Engine of Didactic Beauty" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 53
Freud Attacks!
Walter Alter Aug 2023
I seem to have forgotten
the purpose of civilization
perhaps a simple ratio we are to animals
as animals are to a basket of forks
C.J. Jung as the UFO pilot
in "Freud Attacks" a talkie
a flaming romp through the hubs of hell
hi kids it’s time for ***** training
let's rent a car and take refuge
on the runaway truck ramp
I reached for the emergency brake
got a box of cigars instead
one of the 7 Outright Psychological Wonders
I think we'll need subtitles for this movie
10,000 years of metaphysical illumination
and it's still all work and no play
like tearing your clothes off
at a funeral and jumping on the casket
screaming I've always been ready
OK that's Death Wish 2nd Psychological Wonder
apparently life is not a symbol for something else
sponge my brow nurse this is delicate
but is it a subset of something else
as a catalyst to immediate sensation
that's the Gratification Monster PsyWon 3
mom made voodoo dolls from my ****
using words as an accusing narcotic
Guilt for all Things Psychological Wonder #4
a lot of ifs in there searching for what's next
tinfoil helmets will be issued
for the car bomb inferno
of the Internal Saboteur Wonder 5
next a blank diploma emeritus
from the Wewelsburg Engram University
a knife in the Oedipal Eye Wonder 6
needless to say the Clinic of Doom
quickly ran out of volunteers
needless to say my chromosomes
cringe and grovel under their bed
awaiting a stupendous martyrdom
how did we become radio transparent
and make bargains with man-beasts
I guess a person is as smart
as they **** well want to be
the aid of uncopied ideas never hurts
you can do it in your sleep
but yesterday is gone for good
Mourning and Melancholia leave behind
a bed of fragments from Wonder 7
a person incapable of introspection
is a total failure as a human

From "Engine of Didactic Beauty" available on Amazon
Aug 2023 · 40
Senselessly Urgent
Walter Alter Aug 2023
given the infinite age of the Universe
this could be a simulation
how can unknowing give birth to knowing
how ignorant do you keep yourself
and remain in the comfort zone
no wait ignorance IS the comfort zone
space allows only one thing - simultaneity
meanwhile back at ground zero
a serialized 3-D epic
about the power of of procreation
runs through my Imax skull
things are always string-breaking tense
looking at the sky looking at my watch
checking the rear view for signals
our awareness of time is a scandal
sub divisible much finer than
the mere past present and future
mainly because there is no present
go ahead point to it see there it went
just flushing yer commode
a tale of holy exasperation
the toaster operation didn't go well
Dr. Limbic didn't have a clue
was supposed to relive the past
but up it popped all of it all at once
a replay button that works would be nice
fortunately he was good at patterns
and patterns of patterns
and got a seat by the window
the blurring of lines was spectacular
effortless and frivolous
good that's out of the way
now for some anti-grammatical fun
thanks to my circus training
very safe no firing squads
bus stop poet captive audience
waiting for the Transcontinental Bozo Line
cooking as though for a famine
whatever happens when I die
lord let it not be Munchkin Land
then the screen went blank
and I had to fall back
from an often perplexed state
to a never indexed state
another lizard with two skins
and print everything upon fibrous mats
do your homework

From "Engine of Didactic Beauty" available on Amazon
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