There’s no other time, I’m a mess
So I hope you’ll give me a listen
It’s two am in the darkness
And you can’t see my eyes glisten
You’re a thousand miles away
While you’re laying with me in bed
But the months of tension between us
Has spoken more words than I’ve said
It’s time to let go of the past
I know you can agree
My future doesn’t have you written in it
But that’s as far as I can see
Tomorrow, I’ll be gone
You know by the tremble in my tone
I’ll take my heart as a casualty
Stepping out of this war zone

Of you I still sing
You were my everything
I see your smile
Away from a mile
Your voice
Oh so sweet
Makes me shiver
In my sleep
Your touch
Runs through my spine
But makes me warm
Without you trying
But what I truly miss
Is your sweet sweet kiss

I hope you remember me on the 29th of every month
And I hope you look at every picture
And think of me
I hope you lay in your bed at night
And feel the memory of my body pressed against yours
Sleeping
I hope the ghost of our relationship
Makes you moan into the night
I hope your dog looks at you
And ***** his head
To ask
Where I've been
I hope your hand feels empty
While you take long drives
With the absence of my hand to hold it

I hope these memories burn into your eyes
And engrave my name into your heart
I hope you remember me

There is an empty space now
I don't plan to fill it
It's out in the open like a wound
And no one will tend to it
I don't want to fill the void
I'm sick of doing that
I'll rot in my emptiness
Hopefully till the afterlife
Where maybe I'll see you again
Only you can fill that void
Only you can tend to the wound
You left when you withered away
Only you.

Forget the promises
Forget the love
Forget the passion
Forget the first kiss
Forget the fire in our hearts
Forget the late night calls
Forget the so-called-spark
Forget the sunset beach walks
Forget the pet names
Forget the intensity
Forget it all, cause
I'll forget you

I see the sun set in your eyes
While the sweet moon rises
And for a while,
My problems melt away
And they're gone
As long as I'm in your arms to stay
Under the stars
Where secrets are told
I'm yours for the night
For you to hold
We'll get lost
In another world
When eternity comes
I'll be forever yours
Please never let go
And I will never cease to show
How my heart longs for you
When we are not sharing the same world

Society told me
To look like a ****
Wear no clothes
And get a bigger ****

Society told me
That I am ugly
Much too hideous
For the public to see

Society told me
That I am worthless
And if I took my own life
I would not be missed

Society told me
That skin and bones look hot
They taught me how to eat
...or rather how to not

Society told me
That I am too fat
Well everyone is beautiful..
So
What kind of world says that?

Stars tell stories to travelers
They guide them through the night
Show them how to live for adventure
Show them the value in life

And as they speak
Their words of wisdom
They speak
Of what they've learned and seen

So listen to them closely
For they have a lot to say
But also remember
Story time ends at day

The day we all pretend
We actually like each other

Is four years after one burning summer
Three months after a one night brush
Two days after a midnight kiss
And one second after the last goodbye

They told me that dreams could be achieved, so I could dream as big as I wanted
Nothing could get in the way of my success
So I dreamt of astronauts and doctors and believed I would be them someday
Now that I’m older, I know that there are copious amounts of things that could get in my way

One- they told me to dream but they shoved me into this hole of their lost lives
Trying to get me to be what they aren’t

Two- they box you in from the start, telling you that you’ll only be something in life if you go to college and

Three- college becomes the planet Mars that needs a hell of a lot of work to get to and it seems impossible but they say it’s worth a shot so

Four- you push yourself and every being of your body aches with contempt knowing that they give you expectations that are the size of lightyears
Expectations that exponentially grow every time you get an A+ in whatever subject the University of Mars looks for in your major
Expectations that seem impossible to achieve but they say it’s worth a shot

Five- if nothing could get in my way from success then I would be in every newspaper you read at the breakfast table
I would be known but instead I’m here as a triangle trying to fit in the perfect square mold that they have forged for me

Six- even if I fit, I would pass up on the trip to Mars because thanks, but no thanks, I don’t want to be the meat trying to fill the empty corpse that was your dream

Seven- am I so insufficient that I can’t dream for myself

Eight- I got good grades and I was never bad because I knew that I was going to be something in life so I forced myself to be the square

Nine- I dreamt big because I could
I didn’t need you or them to use me as their string puppet because if I wanted to get **** done I had to do it for myself
And my kids will never go through this, I swear
They will have no mold and I will never burden them
You see,

Ten- they told me nothing could get in the way of my success, but now that I’m older
Now that I’m older, I see that the only thing that was getting in my way
Was you

The next time
You call my name
I won't come running
I've spent too many days
Lingering hopelessly at your side

The next time
You say you're sorry
You will not be forgiven
You won't get a second chance
Too many chances have been given

The next time
I shed a tear over you
Whether it be one or a river
It will be made of pure happiness
In celebration of your good riddance

It's been a ******* long ride and I'm a mess.

The worst mistake I made
Was letting him take my words
Letting him silence me
Because it was then
That I had nothing

I stopped being the person I should be
When I started being the person I want to be
I'm not sure if I'm happy yet
But I'm on my way

if i’m doing too much, let me know
don’t allow me to keep going
don’t allow me to show
i’ve been thinking too much
i may not know right from wrong
set my mind straight
don’t lead me on
set my mind straight
i may not know right from wrong
i’ve been thinking too much
don’t allow me to show
don’t allow me to keep going
if i’m doing too much, let me know

It's nine
And the college fair is in half an hour
And I've never been to one

It's nine forty two
And I've made visits to seven booths
None of which
Catch my attention

It's nine fifty
And I'm wondering
If no schools seem appealing
Because no majors
To me
Are appealing

It's ten
And I have a collection of eight pens
After trading false promises
To fill out
Connection cards

It's ten ten
And the first college
Asks me
What I find interesting
Instead of what asking
What major
I am investing in

It's ten eleven
And after thinking for a bit
I said
Writing

It's ten twelve
And the young man
At the booth
Has given me
The last book he has
Which is a compilation
Of writing pieces
Of students in the school

It's ten thirteen
And I have filled out my first
Connection card
But I do not keep the pen
Because
I know I will remember the school

It is midnight
And I have read through
The writing book
Cover to cover
And have also
Plastered the name of the school
All over every corner
Of my brain
As well as
My bedroom wall

It is midnight
And I have decisions to make

If I could cast away Heartbreak
as easily
as you casted away our
Love
this would be
just

Fine.

I stopped writing poetry when we were together, because all my words became devoted text messages and phone calls. Of course, you were never a man who was good with words, and I grew tired of one sided conversational poems. And you grew tired of my expectations for you to reciprocate. So I guess the pain and exhaustion was mutual. It’s a year and a half later, and I’m writing for the first time in a long time. Maybe this is all over. Maybe the struggle no longer exists, and we both are free. You’re free to keep your words to yourself, and I’m free to set my words on fire. I’m sorry. I guess I’ve always been a solo writer.

My soul is left
Cold and hungry
The longer you stay away
My hands stay empty
And my heart longs for you
My laugh is gone
Otherwise heartless
My once strong stare
Is now covered with tears
My eyes look with ice
Cutting into happiness like a knife
You're gone and you've left so much pain
Look at the things you've done to me