Even to this day, I still think about the times,

That i held you in my arms and I looked you in the eyes.

Many seasons passed, still I keep you in my heart,

Losing you was stupid but we both played each our part.

Many nights, I wake up, panting, break out in a sweat,

Your smiling face and gorgeous eyes, now how could I forget?

Remember back, when we first met, you'd come find me at work?

I couldn't tell but later knew, we'd both flirt back and forth.

And honestly, i was surprised, a girl like you liked me??

That's when i stopped and thought about what you and me might be.



Took me a minute but soon I got a name and seven digits,

And promised you that I would call as soon as work was finished.

We'd conversate and contemplate, things were going great.

Your voice alone was soothing but now im thinkin 'wait'

Could this be a dream? I put those thoughts way back in mind.

When you'd speak to me, I would lose all track of time.

Seconds turned to hours, hours into days.

For now the time was ours, so lets not let it waste.



I was convinced as time went on, I knew you were the one.

You were my life, my everything, my star, you were my sun.

We were both king and queen, together, we would rule

You could grade our love on every subject in school.

Cuz I really loved her, her and all her crazy ways.

Our chemistry was perfect and we'd get a perfect A.

History, we aced it, and mathematics, easy.

Cuz one plus one, is one, we knew together that's what we'd be.

English a no-brainer but spanish was kinda harder.

We took phy ed and passed, then we took it a little farther.

I studied every inch of her, it was my favorite class.

She'd test me every day and every single day i'd pass.

She was the one, even a blind man could see.

Alone I am one half, she's the other part of me...

Not about love or life.
Not about sun and snow.
Not about hate or politics.
What more ought we know.

Not philosophy, psychology or history.
Nor horror, adventure or mystery.
Whether on sea or land,
it will not stand
in the vast oak court of reality.

I watched you dance around the floor
With beads of sweat dripping from your face
You had tears in your eyes
It was perfect, you were perfect

The place was packed with 800 people
All of you prancing with emotion
But i could only see their shadows
Because i couldn't get my eyes off of you

Every move you made was *******
You spun around, you arched your back
You stared across the room and into the spotlight
As if you were a slave seducing your master

You had your green shirt on
That hugged your body so well
And I blushed as i gazed at your perfection

The moment the music stopped playing
You looked up at me and smiled
You waved and you started to walk towards me
You were saying something but I couldn't hear you
I replied but I couldn't hear myself either
I didn't know what we were saying

I watched you walk away to join the second round of rehearsals

You were set to perform that evening, I couldn't wait
I could have watched you all day
I would see you up on stage and I'd be proud as others see how amazing you are

I doubt you know that I think you're perfect
And by perfect I mean beautifully flawed
You held my hand before but I never told you it made me wonder
If you did it because you wanted to or because it was cold

I planned to wear my white dress for you, the one with the lace and all
And I planned to hand you a bouquet of flowers, but not roses
Red tulips and yellow chrysanthemums, probably
Or better yet hydrangeas. I don't know.

I was hoping that after I slipped in my white dress
And after I bought you the flowers
And after you danced
And after they saw how amazing you are
And after I handed you the flowers
That maybe we can spend some time together and maybe you can hold my hand again
I hope it won't be cold so I wouldn't have to wonder, either
And maybe this time when you look at me, you wouldn't look away
But instead press your lips against mine

What I hoped for the most was that I wouldn't wake up
Because if I did, I'd have to dream this dream again till I get the ending I hoped for
I don't mind seeing you every night, having all this happen again
But I can't wait for the night when I'd find out how it ends

A mariner on the ocean of the eternal,
Looking above the bow,
A panoramic view of the presentation of self,
Nautical boundaries and jurisdictions,
Inhabiting and found,
Consciousness of all,
Abound.

One more day like this,
blood will turn to wine.

Another hour unseen,
another promise broken.

One more battle,
One more scar to keep you ashamed.

Blink once,
don't you dare look back,
walk away with the sunrise
keep the devils stare.

I'll meet you there.
I'll meet you somewhere
away from here.

Sleepless nights,
harvest the worst dreams,
I thought you said you didn't feel pain?

Two more lungs,
dried up and corrupt,
we'll walk out
and drown together.

I want to write about her,
But she lives in other dimensions,
Beyond what I perceive,
She soars high above this plane,
Searching for prey to feed upon,
Occasionally,
She swoops down,
When voracious hunger demands,
To find sustenance in bewildered and beleaguered and lost lambs,
Bleating going unheard and unrecognized cries,
She carries them aloft,
Like the lammergeir,
Dropping their bones,
On the rocks below,
To crack and expose the marrow,
Of which she sustains herself,
A devil indeed from above,
Yet for her flight,
I am envious,
And willingly give into night.

Terrifying façade,
long and tall, overpowering
but frail.
Ready to crumble and fall.

Snide wire intertwined,
exit wounds in the concrete flesh.
Each thorn stood to attention,
unwelcoming guards of the now unwanted.

Block after block
of relentless alleyways,
like a labyrinth of colossal gravestones.
The sky opens.

Water rattles bullet-like,
upon the once majestic city walls.
The cathedral moans its last hymn
as the steeple betrays itself.

The descent prevails.

Climbing the stairs,
Til the water reaches me,
To the attic I retreat,
Til the water reaches me,
clinging tightly to prized possessions,
Til the water reaches me,
unheeded warnings,
Til the water reaches me,
following the surge,
Til the water reaches me,
listening but not hearing,
Til the water reaches me,
Holding tight until the end,
Til the water reaches me,
gulping loud slurps,
When the water reaches me.

The chestnut casts his flambeaux, and the flowers
Stream from the hawthorn on the wind away,
The doors clap to, the pane is blind with showers.
Pass me the can, lad; there's an end of May.

There's one spoilt spring to scant our mortal lot,
One season ruined of your little store.
May will be fine next year as like as not:
But ay, but then we shall be twenty-four.

We for a certainty are not the first
Have sat in taverns while the tempest hurled
Their hopeful plans to emptiness, and cursed
Whatever brute and blackguard made the world.

It is in truth iniquity on high
To cheat our sentenced souls of aught they crave,
And mar the merriment as you and I
Fare on our long fool's-errand to the grave.

Iniquity it is; but pass the can.
My lad, no pair of kings our mothers bore;
Our only portion is the estate of man:
We want the moon, but we shall get no more.

If here to-day the cloud of thunder lours
To-morrow it will hie on far behests;
The flesh will grieve on other bones than ours
Soon, and the soul will mourn in other *******.

The troubles of our proud and angry dust
Are from eternity, and shall not fail.
Bear them we can, and if we can we must.
Shoulder the sky, my lad, and drink your ale.

At first glimpse,
I shudder,
there is something in your face,
I almost recognize,
It's different now,
More articulate,
your eyes have become hollow and vacant,
Without spirit,
Haunting and hopeless,
no longer being seen as bestowed by a diety,
lifeless,
No longer illuminating a disheartened world,
Seeing too many unfavorable aspects of life,
drawn,
the light which once poured,
nightfall surrounds,
not of ignorance,
but from experience,
the secrecy of these shadows,
the rendered soul,
cause me to visit the unwelcomeness,
that I have known,
twilight touches my face,
as I step away from the mirror,
promising never to return.