looking into the future, i see nothing

no light, no start, no happy ending

a darkness that consumes hope

death, debt and broken dreams

what's so good about the future

because all i see is a broken me

should she visit my grave after i pass

let her be

let her walk up to where i was buried

and watch how her presence would bring me life

i’ve loved you

for all this time

we’ve spent months, years together

i’ve tried to remain ignorant

i know i’m not good enough, not smart nor hard working enough

but i’ve tried my best to be the best so that we could hopefully last forever

~~~~~~~~~~

but one night

as we talked about marriage

i was excited and went on about how we could get an apartment

about all the boring things like finances

but then you said

“my parents expect you to get a degree, to go to university”

a shattered reality

if its too difficult, if its just easier

just find someone that’s better

someone who isn’t me