I look around, and I see no one else.
It's always just me, surrounded by myself.

Some would call this hell: living in such seclusion.
But I am surrounded by simplicity; not by confusion.

I'm not really alone. Presence of grace lies in every nook.
The love of my God is visible in every place that I look.

I may be all by myself. "Trapped in this place"
But with my faith around my neck, I feel safe.

It reminds me of who I am. Reminds me my suffering's done.
Reminds me of the kid I used to be. And the man yet to come.

The homes I was raised in shine in every detail.
And I know He is with me. With Him, I won't fail.

So am I really alone when no one else is around?
Because I can hear His voice when there are no other sounds.

My Theme
I am allowed to fall in love
over and over
What if I like that feeling?
That feeling of fire in my belly

I know what I feel is unacheivable
I know half the time you'll say no

But just like learning, the way to find love
is to sift out all those
unworthy
making mistakes, then learning from them

how do I know you're not eternal
if I don't sing you my song?
if I don't do my dance.
If we never make love.

I've learned from you that
no, maybe you aren't my mate.
And maybe we aren't destined
for eachother.

but yes you are as close to me
and as important.
and Yes, love is worth fighting for.
even a love
not built for me.

Once I met a platypus;
I took her to my heart.
We held hands by the lake at night,
And flew kites in the park.

We drank red wine by moonlight,
And closer, by degrees,
Expressed our deepest feelings;
Explored our fantasies.

And then, as these things happen,
There came a happy day:
We took an ad out in The Times
Announcing progeny.

But outrage at the outcome -
Our beloved platy-pups -
Was front page in the tabloids!
What was the platy-fuss?

We gave the papers interviews,
We gave our truth and trust -
But still my Love was slandered
Just for being oviparous!

We formed an equal rights group.
We founded charities.
To educate, to celebrate
Our ovi-parity!

We swore a solemn, binding oath,
Between the two of us
The Wedding feast and party was
Quite monatrematous!


Uncle Mallangong was tearful;
Aunt Echidna was abeam:
The Boondaburra “Moonwalking”
Was something to be seen!

There were Joeys sloshed on cider,
Wombats smoking ****;
Emus snogging at the bar -
Koalas wild on speed!

For sickness, health; for poorer,
Or for great prosperity;
I will love and hold and cherish,
Through all adversity,

My nondarwinian lover;
My mutant, duck-billed Queen!
My unconventional ******;
My monotreme – my dream!

The Fear
Of you leaving,
Is too much for me.

The Fear
Of one day,
Losing all our memories.

The Fear
Of being separated,
In two different worlds.

The Fear
Of not reaching you,
Or being left unheard.

The Fear
That you'll forget me,
And swiftly move on.

The Fear
Of realising that,
This battle cannot be won.

The Fear
Of admitting that,
You're the one that makes me smile.

The Fear
Of saying 'for you,
I'd walk a thousand miles'.

The Fear
Of being called stupid,
And you thinking it too.

The Fear
Of confessing that,
I really love you.

But all these **Fears
Have come around,
As if all truth,
Has been found.
You hold her hand,
Instead of mine.
You kiss her lips,
Like its all fine.
You look through me,
Like I'm a ghost.
The memories have vanished,
That I treasured the most.
All I've lost,
Was it ever even found.
Now my heart lies shattered,
All over the ground  
You look at me,
All love is gone.
That's when I realise,
That The Fear has won.

My darling,
I remember,
when you laid in my arms, and i watched you sleep,
like it was the most simple thing you could have done for me to fall in love with.
You held my hand against your chest like it were attached to your heart,
your very lifeline entwined within my fingers.
I watched each rise and fall of your chest,
and it was the only thing in the world i knew that was keeping me alive.
Your face looked as if it had found heaven,
and as i slept i found mine in yours.
I wanted to dive in with you, in to your dreams
and see what you were seeing,
and feel what you were feeling,
because i wanted nothing more to be everything,
your entire world.
I remember,
when we used to laugh and the safest place i felt,
was in your arms,
and when we used to laugh, it was like our world collided in the air between us,
and exploded like a firework in an indian night sky,
the space that we used to stand apart between,
was now joined as one.
I remember,
you had the most beautiful eyes i had ever seen,
and my brain forgot how to formulate words when you looked at me,
I went dumb,
and  i was ok with that,
being lost in thought at you.
You used to tell me how i was the most beautiful thing you had ever seen,
and i was loved more than i ever really knew,
you used to tell me that i had saved you,
that you wanted to be my forever,
I remember now,
I remember.
I remember,
how you thought i was your everything,
when really i was drowning without you,
suffocating without your laughter,
blinded without your eyes,
and numb without your hand.
Memories of you,
the best thing i ever lost.
You saved my heart,
as i was drowning in a sea of pain,
you threw me a line,
after line,
after line.
I remember now,
how i loved you with all my being.
And you really did save my life.

She's right there
fifteen feet from me,
my red, dilated eyes
and bleeding legs
screaming her name
or rather screaming the fact that I couldn't scream her name
couldn't whisper it,
couldn't even get close enough
that if I had whispered it, she would have heard me.
But she's right there
and she doesn't hear me anyway.
So why am I bleeding?
Why am I high?
Why am I broken?
She doesn't care