as I do sit-ups,
I ask for a mat
Because my spine
Scrapes
On
The
Ground
I eat
So much
but you cant tell
you only see
The
Scrapes
On my spine
"Eating disorder"
Only if eating
more
than my whole family is a disorder
don't judge me
for my
bony arms
and my
flat ***
DONT judge me
for how hard I try
"Where does it all go?"
"Anorexic"
"Skinny *****"
who the **** gives you the authority to make fun of me
I Hate Myself
for the wrong reasons

when the stars collide,
maybe you'll mind your own buissness,
maybe you'll see that I don't want you intruding on my life
how I don't care if you feel as though we have fallen out
you care for me the wrong way
the way that I think is too much
mind your own business
stop creeeping into my life
stop socializing with my friends
just stop
                                                       At the same time though
                                                I miss how you hold me
                                        I miss how you touch me
                                  I miss how you look into my eyes
                         and say
                "It'll all be alright"
So maybe I don't want you to stop
maybe I just want a different love
one that isn't so tough
one that I can depend on
one that shouldn't depend on me so much


                        I Wish You'd Love Me From Farther Away

Sick of you
Sick of him
Sick of the way you like him better than me
how is it that
you
care for him
the man
that I care for too
at the same time
I care for you as well
It
   is
      All
           So
               Sick

he's peering over my shoulder,
watching me type,

hes gazing from across the room,
stop, please
I
Am
Uncomfortable

"be yourself"
"no wait"
"stop"
"too much"

it's so overwhelming
the work
why do you have to make it worse
the pain
it's so hard to deal with
already
why do you feel the need to
make it worse
I try
try
try
so hard
to impress
but you are never satisfied





are you done torturing me yet

I want to do it,
to do what I've always wanted
You wish I wouldn't
because then you would be haunted
because what I would have done
would have
involved a gun