Bob's homosex-themed blanket factory attracted a youthful lesbian of 30 named Donna to apply for a job. "I wanna make lesbian blankets to keep lesbians warm in Alaska," she told Bob with tears in her eyes. "Well then try this! It's our new Klondike blanket!" He exclaimed with a lot of passionate excitement in his voice.

Ch. 1 : “Of course I don't like war, but Mexico is asking for it...”
My left knee hurt and I knew that I'd need left-knee surgery when I returned to the palace. Fortunately my mother, who is the queen of England, wasn't home so I hung my ****** on the throne to air out. It was just 2 minutes later when the red phone rang: “Mexico has dropped a couple of nuclear H-bombs on Pakistan.”; “*******!” I exclaimed. I immediately contacted central command. “This is the prince of England! I want 70,000 soldiers dispatched to Mexico right now!!!”; “Yes sir!” Said the guy on the other end.

Ch. 2 : Cindy's *** puckered like a strangled duck unused to French bread dough. “Did you order the attack on Mexico?” She asked.
   “Yes I did Cindy. As prince of England I see it as my duty.”
   “I love you,” Cindy said, “more than I love God.”
   “Thanks Cindy, but I'm not God, I'm only the prince of England.”

Ch. 3 : “Royal Duties Beyond the Horizon”
My attack on Mexico saved billions of lives in Pakistan and the king of Pakistan knew it. He called me as soon as he could.
   “Please your royal, highly-worshiped Prince of England,” he began, “accept the gratitude of the people of Pakistan for what you have done to save them from being killed by Mexicans.”
   “You're welcome,” I said. “I was simply doing my job as prince of England. Let's pray that Mexico has learned her lesson.”

Ch. 4 : “Mexico Apologizes”
It didn't take long for el presidente de Mexico to see the error of his ways. In a letter sent to me from the president's house in Mexico City, the president wrote: Dear Prince of England: I'm so sorry for dropping a couple of  nuclear H-bombs on Pakistan the other day. I don't know why I did it. I promise Sir Royal Prince of England that I won't ever do it again. Please forgive me. I am really sorry.  ~ Sincerely, the president of Mexico

Ch. 5 : “Apology Accepted”
As the prince of England I know that nobody's perfect, not even the president of Mexico. I accepted his apology on behalf of the people of Pakistan whom the president of Mexico had dropped a couple of  nuclear H-bombs on several days before.

Just wait José! Someday your knees will buckle and you will experience asthma and your chihuahua will succumb to dog cramps and your sister will too and then your cousin will double over in dog-cramp agony till nobody's breathing on their own anymore.

Song by Hazel O'Connor

Hey you, standing there, what you got to stare at?
I'm not shy if your beady little eyes abuse me like some mishap
Cackling laughter behind your hand, you're so funny, you're so bland
Here's the thing you can't understand: You are just a programme
You're a programme, you're a programme
(Programme, programme, programme, programme)
Give me an inch, and I'll take me a mile
Give me the distance from your supercilious smile
Give me an inch, and I'll take me a mile
Give me the distance from your supercilious smile
Your silliest smile
Hey you, standing there, better get some clothes on
Do as you're told, growing old, and read your daily poison
Skeletons locked in the closeted mind, locked in tight, for no one to find
See the blind, lead the blind, gotta be cruel to be kind
Who is mind-blind, who is mind-blind
(Mind-blind, mind-blind, mind-blind, mind-blind)
Give me an inch, and I'll take me a mile
Give me the distance from your supercilious smile
Give me an inch, and I'll take me a mile
Give me the distance from your supercilious smile
Your silliest smile
You are a programme, you are a programme
Give me an inch, and I'll take me a mile
Give me the distance from your supercilious smile
Give me an inch, and I'll take me a mile
Give me the distance from your supercilious smile
Your silliest smile
Give me an inch, and I'll take me a mile
Give me the distance from your supercilious smile
Give me an inch, and I'll take me a mile
Give me the distance from your supercilious smile
Your silliest smile

Song writer: Hazel O'Connor
"Give Me an Inch" lyrics © BMG Rights Management,
Universal Music Publishing Group

Pish posh, **** ***, candy floss, dreck & dross, profit/loss, Hoss re-
mains Little Joe's boss. I ate a tuna fish when I was young. It jump-
ed into my mouth when I was asleep after I made it with the mother
of Little Bo Peep, pleaser of leased sheep & a creeper in a sea deep.

...𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐭𝐡 𝐨𝐟 𝐌𝐚𝐥𝐭𝐞𝐬𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐬
Wherever I goes this is about the length of Maltese noses. If I hated
you more along the surf-tide of a Pacific-coast fizz you'd chalk it up
to Biblic points revealing an Occidentalized Lost-Sea-Scroll gnosis.

📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚­📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚­­📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚­📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚📚

Wiener King & Muzzle Man died today in a vat of butter at the butter dairy where Maria Hopkins lived under her desk in office six. Nobody with an ounce of oleo could've shaved either of them 'cause their beards were tangled. Love's one thing, not the only thing.

2 lesbians who didn't know the meaning of "Stop it because it's against the law!" stumbled down the dusty road hand-in-hand to meet Jesus because they were dead tired. "There He is!" Martha exclaimed. "I don't see Him!" Jan responded. Tragically later, Jan's baby (conceived by secret lesbian impregnation methods) would grow up to look more like Hillary Clinton than was normal for a child who wasn't exposed to major radioactive impurities. "I'm tired and my lesbian parts are killing me," Martha stated like she was the queen of forever. "Soon we'll be at Motel 6 enjoying the treasures of our lifestyle," Jan whispered while her chafed thighs bled spottily like 6 employees of Dairy Queen in a car wreck.

I saw a baby at Walmart in the baby section in a baby stroller laughing and carrying on like babies do so I tell the mother and she's like "So what?" and I'm like "I was just sayin'" and she's like "I bet you can't even have a baby!" and I'm like "Here's my cell number" and she's like "I don't wanna call you" and I'm like "That's my prison cell number. I just escaped!"

Granny left me
more money
than you be-
cause she loved
me a lot, that
much is true

Mama left me
big money, 300
million more than
she left you, be-
cause she loved
me like crazy, we
both know that
it's true