Many settlers were eaten by muskrats during the Muskrat War of 1855. Tom, a young pioneer, settled down for a night of restful sleep in his tent when all of a sudden he was eaten by a muskrat, a smart-*** muskrat that would cleverly assume his identity and go on to become a wealthy Abraham Lincoln impersonator.

One day a ton of women will be more than 5 women. In the future people will wear underpants because they want to, not because the underpants Mafia forces them to. In 50 years 500 million Negroes will own the unemployment business: being unemployed with pride; ******* back orange Faygo; eating dog food. Before Jesus returns, ****** promiscuity will ******* the Mormon church as **** Mormons become a million times more sexually promiscuous than they are right now.