2 Budweiser toilet paper roll holders (1 gay, 1 normal) $6 each; long metal rod for beating people with (beat them till they die) $10; old shoe polish from Kmart (it's very hard, probably no good anymore) $4; water bed for swingers (have *** with lots of women on it who aren't very ****) $80. Contact me now for more stuff later.

I recently met a nice ***** man who sleeps under a tarp beneath a bridge on interstate highway 95. His name is Tyrone and he has 14 children to 10 women. We shared a can of pinto beans as he told me about his interesting life: "I was born to a multi-billion-dollar family who founded Canada and three-quarters of modern America. Each morning our French maid {who was always naked} prepared luscious soul food that made our large penises harder than bauxite. I wanted to grow up quickly and make her have babies until she couldn't anymore. Her name was Fifi Alabama, and I loved her more than dogs love having themselves euthanized. She was a lovely woman with large knobs that could tell you how fast the wind was blowing when we were cruising on my dad's 300-million-dollar yacht. Anyway, she was in love with my cousin Jamaal who was of ***** descent. Fifi preferred ***** men because she was crazy. I often marveled at the way her labials sparkled in the moon-glow like a thousand nurses eating tuna fish on top of the Empire State Building during a hurricane and even if it takes 20 years, I'll possess Fifi's body and impregnate it a lot. Amen and so help me God and Merry Christmas."

One day a ton of women will be more than 5 women. In the future people will wear underpants because they want to, not because the underpants Mafia forces them to. In 50 years 500 million Negroes will own the unemployment business: being unemployed with pride; ******* back orange Faygo; eating dog food. Before Jesus returns, ****** promiscuity will ******* the Mormon church as **** Mormons become a million times more sexually promiscuous than they are right now.

To reduce fagginess, John Travolta had cosmetic surgery on his face
and yet the fagginess remained till age 46 when his nose exploded
from a freakish congenital anomaly called post-queer nasal burst.
Later on, John kissed a man on the lips at the airport for 5 minutes.