You kiss em
You rub em
You **** em
You put your mouth on em
Or something.

It's the end o the year
We move like a roomba
Or Joe Biden
That's a line that belongs to a comic
Who do live among em in his life he do frolic

How we move forward
Is defined by the press
Which is constantly changing
At technological  behest
Is the road unavoidable?
More people?
More logic?
Devoid o time constrictions
The conversation
More phonic.

How to navigate the planet
And where the planet is
To use the correct verbiage
And how to raise your kids
How to cook the food you eat
And to talk to your friends
To formulate your stance
and execute your ends
Instruction
On the way to feel
About the coming
Amalgamation
To assimilate
For the greater good
Or live in isolation.

What goes up must come down
Except Elon's space car
It's infinity bound
Is that true?
If it keeps on going?
Chances of collision
Beyond our knowing
The fence of the cosmos
We cannot see
It will not be revealed  to thee

Unleast not yet

The boffins say never
So we wait in ignorance
Always together.

The Medusa touch
Is the British
Rosemary's Baby
Only better

A triumph in the moonlight
Hackneyed *****
In the cold light
Of this cruel
Saturday

I remember a fella
At war with his self
At times he seemed lost
But not beyond help
He howled at the moon
He wept to the rain
The ants in his pants
Then lived in his veins
His verse was beauty
It was warm
It was tight
Right up to the day
That he turned
Out
The
Lights.

If men can be rakes
And the ladies get called hoes
What garden tool
Are the sexless
Do you suppose?

All hail the Toblerone
King of the awkward chocolates
If you buy a big one on a plane
It'll drain all of your pockets
Of residual dollars or euros
Bhatt **** or lek
Or **** it!
Why not dash off
Your last travellers cheque

Honeyed almond sweetness
Who could decry that
Only the honeyed almond intolerant
And you can never trust them *****
Just it's satisfying chunkiness
It's heft and it shape
Is something deeply pleasing
The chocolate biscuit it doth take

It's true name lost to time
It should be Tobler one
For its creator was named Tobler
And he'd only just begun.

But there he stopped.

There's always bin the idea
O two sets o books
Ever since books were invented
A curious process in which we all are involved
It's what keeps us from going demented

One set the truth
That unravels unheeded unseen perhaps
By those around who look on
The other your truth
Somewhat tailored but blurred
Of what you thought
You'd become

Cos the moral compass has no external dial
To ink on your page no one listens
So You can write down the details
However you like
Talk about a double entry system.

A host of disappointed optimists
Crestfallen once again
The odds were stacked against them
But they remembered when
A Ronnie Radford or Micky Thomas
Could explode a tiny ground
the roof would come off the place
An exhilarating sound
But as it drained down to ninety minutes
With chances growing thin
A thousand tin foil FA Cups
Are going in the bin.

Of course
Eventually
Everyone gets used to hell
Insufferable torment
Deep in the infernal well
The problem is the timescale
And Satan knows it's true
The ones condemned
The earliest now tolerate it
Eternity through
But he's not worried really
To technology he aspires
What with nano devices
And the promise of AI.

Stalin had the oil
****** had the cash
Von Ribbentrop
And
Molotov
Made a cocktail
That couldn't last.

I'm lining em up
Urologist
Proctologist
Phlebotomist
Clinician
Radiologist
Encologist
Anaesthesiologist
Mortician.

I've given up sarcasm for lent
It's going great.

Steven Spielberg called
And offered me and my identical twin brother a job
It was on his hatchery
We'd be monitoring
The defacatory habits
Of the livestock
We were to be
Close Hen Counters Of the **** Kind.

The only thing stopping you
Is that massive unclimbable boulder
You pretend can't be walked around.

Hello there
How you doing
We haven't talked before
I know we might have
Seen each other
That's a lie
I've loved you
From afar
I know I shouldn't say this
But we've lived a life complete
With kids grandkids
And side kids
On both sides
That's a relief
It took just
A few minutes
As I saw you walking up
Time simply dilated
And that was tough
Enough.

Is that a **** or ***** stain on my carpet?
I really can not tell
I've got no idea how it got there
I'm not feeling very well.

Did you hear about
The mafia boss
With a PhD in quantum mechanics?
He made them an offer they couldn't understand.

When Marco Tardelli scored
In the final
Against the Germans in 82
It was like something
Not seen before
Or since too

A kinetic miracle displayed
And I'm not talking about the goal
More to do with miracles
And the nature of the soul

Something extraordinary happened
And it's still frozen in time
Where one mans essence
And the universe entwined

It is the celebration
That still lives in the air
A being stripped
Of all presence
And dull earthly care

He went off like a rocket
To whence he knew not where
He sprinted to the bench
Then hither
Then there

His team mates couldn't catch him
And they really tried
Old Marco carried off
On the crest
Of some unstoppable tide

Eyes bulging
Tears streaming
Screaming
GOL!
GOL!
GOL!
His arms jalisticating
As the pitch he fast roamed

Of course he gets asked about that night
By all that he meets
Says he has no memory
Of when his feet were so fleet

Except

His entire life flashed before his eyes
He said he felt just like someone
Who knows they will die
Maybe his pineal flooded his skull
Perhaps the frequency of creation
Stirred his hot chemicals

A true uniqueness
Of joy unbounded

What were the odds?

In a true Bukowskism

He was perfect laughter

He was alone with the gods.

Are you hungry?

I love Easter
It like a more honest Christmas
A few months stumbling
To really what what's life is
To take the glory
Then run?
Or take the deal
Already spun?
The Apostles
All dealt in their own way
Wether the 30 bits of silver
Or Crucified upside down to deliver
The affirmation
Of the light
The truth
And the way.

The throb you feel or you don't
Bounces off of some of
The things
That you want
But then again
There's the general malaise
That imagines
With no evidence
The things that you crave.

My father died of dyslexic alchoholism
He choked on his own Vimto.

Just a sherry at Christmas
Or your liver in a sling
Maybe one o them
For whom
Abstinence is the thing
We spread across the boozey map
In all the directions there are
Negotiate the contours
As we head toward the bar
Some move to the desert
Where there barely falls a drop
Some might as well live in the ocean
The soak that never stops
Some imbibe for giggles
Others to ward off life
To many it's a form of marriage
The sauce she is my wife
Wether  slightly buzzed
And connected
Or too arseholed to think
We see the city on the hill
As where we go to drink.

I remember when
And it wasent
That long ago
The nature of the now
Changed
When the
Nature
Of the
Nature
Went unnatural
Somehow
And yet
It gets
Thinner
With
Time
But
It
Takes so long
It's like the dripping
Of lime

Every breath comes with effort
Every step with pain
The ****** things you did
Flash over and over again
You never see your friends
And they have never seen you
Once ruddy with passion
Now you just feel blue
Ache
Cough
Splutter
Limp
Arched over like aged cast out toothless chimp
Can't connect to the world
To my dim eyes
It's just crazy
I said it once
And I'll say it again
I wish the lord would take me.

How would one know
And where would
One go
When the
Nature
Of
Everything
Can
Never
Be changed

I imagine Silent Echo
In the afterlife
He turns up
In the middle of a management shake up
After the strike
They need some new angles
To enhance the customer experience
So a couple of classics
Need some updating
And Echo gets assigned
A job he's perfect for
The guideded tour
Microphone man
For the trip across the Styx
Pointing out humorous
Historical murderous mistakes
As Charon rolls his eyes
He's heard this *******
Spiel now
A couple o billion times.

The nature
Of all
Your jotting
And where it gets
Revealed
Seems like
A chocolate orange
Left on
Chrimbo Eve.

Target acquired
We got him on the thermal imaging
Yet he neutralised the threat
We could not launch against him
He walks twixst the raindrops
He hides in plain sight
All attempts to bring the hammer down
Just end up in *****
He seems so protected
Just what has he done?
To have the machine and the earth
Pressed under his thumb

We couldn't see atoms
In any kind of visual way
Till about thirty years back
And before that they did say
You'll never be able to see em
Not enough luminosity they display
Once you zoom in that far enough
The photons *******
So way hey hey

But they didn't reckon on
The sensitivity of advancement
And now
The image forms
With a radiological shift
They all look like golf *****
On Gods sacred pitch.

It's not Tuesday
I hear you say
I believe that
Does matter anyway
Good lord
The facts are not real
So get ready for incredible speed
I say things that you cannot believe
But get ready
For stuff
That
Makes you
Feel
Real.

Essentially inedible
Is that all
That terrible?
When you consider
Where the criticism came from.

Ozzy's not quite the prince o darkness anymore
No more coke no more ******
The road miles and habits
Have piled on the damage
Hardly surprising
The man was a savage
His lower colon
Is now like liquidised spam
Sharon has to deal with
The diarrhea of a madman.

Scrooge would be just about clocking off now,the **** piece.
But at least he led by example.

Once there was nothing
But nothing
Wasent having that
It wanted to be something
Something other than nothing
Yet there was nothing
And that should have been the end of that
Then there was something
So nothing must have worked it out.

The boy stood on the burning deck
Cowered in the terrible light
A warmth below he felt
Cos in his kecks
He'd  *****.

Probably
About
Tuesday
Afternoon.

The quick brown fox
Jumped over the lazy dog
He could not be bettered
Like a super efficient postman
He just run out o letters.

What's the value
Of a diamond
When it's in the ground?
It's not even the worth of the gem
More the chance it might
Be found.

If I keep eating
Pies pasties and puddings
Would gravity's weak force
Be countermanded
So I could slip these
Surly bonds?

I've been staring at a greyness of late
No joy to which I relate
Feeling both ancient and infantile
It'd be nice to be alive for awhile.

It's a cycle or so they say
From singin the blues to feeling gay
Sort the laughs out into a pile
Yes I'd like to be alive for awhile.

The mood is different the laughs are old
By your father you have been forestalled
Who layed it down in that old sweet style
I remember he was alive for awhile.

In the immortal words o  the late great Jonny Mathias
Oh ** oh oh oh ** oh ** oh **
Oh ** ** oh ** oh oh ** oh **
Oh ** ** ** **
Oh ** ** oh
Oh ** oh **
Oh oh ** oh **.

Saw an ad in the personal colounm
Looking for someone to meet and immediately ******
Have *** with your corpse and then eat you.
Thinking about giving it a go.

How many cats
Do you think
You could fight?
If a host came at you
Out of the night

Your not allowed a weapon
It's fist versus claw
So there is no deception
Under  cat law

Don't worry bout animal cruelty
The god's agree
You're above opprobrium
You cannot flee

You've started so you'll Finish
You must go on to the death
No matter the toll
On your corporeal health

You must be stripped to the waist
No belt
No shoes
Interspecies fight club
Except you can spread the news
Of the licks that you took and the numbers you slew
From the  plié of dead moggies
Down that you threw

That's if you survive
The feline Blitzkrieg
For they could easily end you
And they will not grieve .

Chernobyl fall out!
Chernobyl fall out!
Russian ******
Are nowt to shout about!

There's untold matter
Outside the void
You'd think
Some of it
Might want to get in
To give its selves
A bit more room
Reorientation
Again.

In  an interminable tinny
Swirling queue
Thanked repeatedly
And quick succession
As I develop
Hypertension.