The presence of your absence
fills my heart with emptiness
lightning my soul with darkness
through the worsening "better"s
that different feeling has become alike
Building the destroyed in an excited calmness
trying to continue an interrupted life
full of spiritual vowels and consonant lies
All the sounds of the vowels and consonants
Make words that make no sense
While I go through a “letter y” despair

Sometimes we can only see the blossom
when we hit the bottom
little joys of life
help to strive

I know you care about me
and this sets me free
and let me be
bringing me a cup of tea

I dream of poems every night
walk through the vast sunflower fields with delight
mourning doves fly around
bringing me peace, love, and hope abound

I dream of poems every night
wander around a dense woodland bright
and a red cardinal lands on my shoulder
sent from heaven, I know you are near.

I dream of poems every night
scuffle through a crowd but lose sight
when I run around to find you in vain
you die again and again

Pacing through the desolate forest
with the recalling voice of the chorist
rain touches my soul
as I ramble in my inner black hole

The wind washes my face
as  sorrow and sadness chase
I leave myself to the propelling wind
to leave everything behind

Thinking about all that happened when the wind blows my hair
how could life dare
separate us
and fill my heart with pus?

You know right?
that little bird does not even care about your death
He will continue to chirp and sing
whether you are dead or alive, he will swing
because a bird realizes grief
only if his pair bond has been broken just next to its wing
still then
after a little while... aw, the docile
he starts chirping
as he has been designed to do so
he cries inside but he has to
tweet, twitter, cheep and chirp
masking the shriek and loud cry deep inside

When trying to declutter
You clutter everything even more
disrupting the present with the past
forming a bricolage of me through various jammed selves
and adding new crammed shelves to my brain
clogging the blood in my veins
in a never can be reversed way

Leaves shadow wild blooms
veiling their beauty like dense and gray fumes
behind the dense dunes
through swishing and rustling tunes