It started slowly,
Not alerting me as it came in,
Creeping gently,
Like it might break my skin.

The pain in my heart,
When I smile,
The pieces that fall down,
When I try to laugh.

But when I cry,
I am all right,
All the pain,
Goes away.

When happiness enters,
My heart meddles,
Making me breathless,
Feeling like an inanimate stone.

Fake, Fake, Fake, Fake, Fake, Fake

That's what my smiles truly are,
And when the real one pops,
I try to battle it down,
Before it topples my emotionless crown.

I feel suffocated,
I feel weak,
The monster inside of me,
Wants to be free


Every time I cover up my face,
With an emotionless mask,
It rattles it’s cage,
To punch back at those remarks.

But I'll wait,
Patiently,
Until it's time comes.
And my mask has to fall.

If my blood turned into rubies,
Everytime I cut,
At least I would have an excuse,
To do so.

"You  cant study properly
You cant dance properly
You  cant sing properly
You cant talk properly
You cant act properly
You cant play properly
You cant read properly"
I couldn't see properly
I couldn't feel properly
I couldn't breathe properly.
Now
I cant breathe at all.

She looked at him like he was the sun,
In that she never looked at him,
Except out of frustration.

She complained when he was gone,
But she never looked.

On days he was stronger, she hid from him
On days he was muted, she complained.

She never looked at him until he was leaving,
And in the beauty of the sunset she wondered how,
She'd never seen him before