I dont know how i got here
But i knew this was coming
I looked at him
His eyes are closed
Naked under the sheets
Sleeping peacefully
I want to touch him but i can't
And i won't
Cause its not right
He left me
Never knew the reason why
And then after all these months he came back
Still no explanation
I am sick of it
Whenever he looks at me
I see it
His eyes shine
As if i am holding the stars
And hanging the moon
Then why cant he make me feel that
I knew from the very first
That we are not compatible
How could we
When everything is wrong with us
Its toxic
But then why i feel like
Its him only him that i can love
I love him but i cant give up easily
I want to touch his face
Kiss his lips
He has dark circles under his eyes
Maybe from overworking
He is an insominac
But i have never seen
He always says it that when he is with me
He sleeps peacefully
I cant do this anymore
His eye brows are forming a frown
Maybe he found out that i am staring at him
He opens his eyes
He looks at me
The same glimmering eyes
The same look
"Are you ok"
He asks
After all these things he did to me
He still asks me that
"I want to go back "
I say coz i know i cant control myself anymore
He is still looking at me
His face without any expression
Deep down i know what he is feeling
He is hurt
His is having a turmoil inside
He gets up the steets are not enough to cover him any more
I am scared that he will get furious
But he never does
"Please dont , give me a chance i promise i wont mess up this time"
For the first time i saw something
He never begs ,never
And he is doing it to me
His face showing uncertainty
He is older than me
But right now i know i am the bigger here
I dont trust myself to answer
He is not looking at me
His head is tilted downwords
I saw him flinch when i touch him
He is scared
"Ok" i can't  recognize my voice
He looks at me
His eyes are watery
A tear starts to fall
He never cries
He always said that crying is for the weak
But why now
I touch his face
" i love you"
He says
He knew i wont answer
And i kiss him
His lips touch mine
I want to cry
Cause i know i am going to regret it
But i am taking the risk
I love you
I love you
I love you
He says it again and again
Despite of knowing
He wont get this in return
We kiss and
we kiss and
we kiss.