Happy Something (31-12-2021)

Should auld acquaintance
Be forgot....
"Who you calling auld?"
"Forget what?"
"Is it tomorrow yet?"
"it is in Australia!"
"Must be all those Kangaroos!"
"Cheers!"

by Jemia

Net

In a far of place
As yet mostly unexplored
Two green ponderous eyes
Appear through thick foliage
They watch
With great intensity
As a spider
Busily weaves
Laying out its table
To catch its passing breakfast
And is soon satisfied
As a moth
Haphazardly
Crashes into the silk tapestry
The eyes blink knowingly
The green eyes
Then appear
At the waters side
There are some men
On small skiffs
Casting their nets
And within a few moments
They are pulling in
Flapping fish
The green eyes blinks
Waves
Then fades
Into the shades
The boy with the green eyes
Wanders along a forest path
He is pondering
Over what he has witnessed
And as he is approaching
The nearby village
To share his discoveries
He is suddenly
Pulled into the air
And finds himself
Caught in a trap
Of ropes
He now knows
How the moth, and fishes feel
But he is lucky
As he has a small knife
And cuts himself free
But his freedom has a price
As he falls into the jaws
Of a tiger
His green eyes
Dimmed
Then died

by Jemia

Staring into a blank screen,
Thinking thoughts, that might of been,
Over the hill, and far away,
Seeking serenity, in the land of Fae,
Time to rest, and let it lay
As an over-riding emptiness
Lies down
And goes to sleep
As hollow tears
begin to creep
Into the abyss
Of no return
Where my heart
And soul now burn

by Jemia

My flat lies dormant
Yet full of a multitude
Of expectations
For a myriad
Of possibilities
A cluttering gathers
Yet remains inane
For some as yet
Has an unknown purpose
Each item
Is awaiting it's own birth
Whereupon
The realization
Of each's meaning
Will be revealed
This includes myself
An unknown
Unstoppable force
Awaiting my encounter
With an immovable object
When the two unite
It will be love
I await in anticipation
Of wishing for something
That deep down
I know
That i am now destined
To remain amongst the clutter
Of the what
Might have beens

by Jemia

Day, After Day

I look out of my window
And i'm confronted
With a thick mist
Wondering perhaps
That ive died
And this is
Some kind of strange afterlife
I go to pinch myself
Yet decide not to
As i haven't as yet
Decided
That i want to be alive
And that in the meantime
I'll remain
In this strange
Limbo world
Somewhere between
Non-existence, to another non-existence
If i become the food of worms
Then so be it
Whichever way
I'll still be alone
Life
Is such a strange game
To play
Day, after day
After day

by Jemia

What none of us
Have yet realised
Is that planet Earth
Is a massive psychiatric holding unit
For the planet Bulcrapio
We are all implanted
With something in our brain
To disguise the fact
We are all insane
And we have been left
To our own devises
Some of us
Have learnt to adapt
And occasionly recognise bull crap
And thus
Not quite as mad
As some of the others
And some make wild claims
That we are from another planet!
oops!
But it has become apparent
That the most insane
Out of all of us
End up, somehow
Becoming the most powerful
Normally elected by those
Who are possibly more insane
But less ambitious
As why else
Would these people
Get into office
In the first place?
The world hasn't gone mad
It' always been mad
It just seems madder!

by Jemia, formerly Ann Boleyn, and also Cleopatra!

A
One of my tutors at uni
Once said of my handwriting
"It appears
As if
A drunken spider
Has crawled across
The pages!"
I said
"Twas not the spider
That was drunk!"
How we laughed!
B
I was thinking
Only yesterday
That i can
Make analogies
'Til the cows come home
C
Someone bid
On an ebay
Thing of mine
Then cancelled
A false profit!

all unfortunately by
Jemia

From Wuthering Heights
To withering frights
Lo! i am the witch that be
I live on the sand, just by the sea

I cause the sand, to fall into your bread
I laugh at your curses, and what you have said
And watch with joy, as the seagulls attack
And fly away with, your seaside snack

I don't have a broom, as i use a sail
I cackle, and curse, and occasionally wail
And should you wonder at my green-ness indeed
It's due to my diet, of eating seaweed!

I especially enjoy things, when the sky turns grey
And a storm is brewing, with plenty of spray
With a cold wind ablowing, sand everywhere
I cackle, and chuckle, as it gets in your hair

Apart from all that, cold, and ice
Deep down inside, I'm actually quite nice
If you meet me, i'll happily include you
In my eye of newt, and wing of bat stew!

by Jemia

He fell on the Fell
As he fell over, falling on the Fell
His fellow Fell walker
Also fell on the Fell
These two fellas fell over
Falling on the Fell
They feel the Fell
Made them fall
Such foolish falling
Fell walking fellers they were

by Jemia

On the radio
Earlier today
They mentioned
Or so they say
About a fifteenth century Carol
Now long gone bye
That's still around
And would not die
I thought "Oh wow"
(Be i so bold?)
"She's really old!"

by Jemia

My poor poor rabbit
It is no more
With its soft floppy ears
And deep blue one eye
Shall no longer
Hop around the hutch
I'll miss
Miss Floppy Fun Bun
And how
You brought a twinkle
To my eyes
I don't know
Where to inter her
As i don't have room
In my special garden
Which is a bit bushy
I wonder if she's
Recyclable?

by Jemia

The media
Are stirring the ***
Of peoples frustrations
Like vultures
Readying themselves
To tear of the flesh
Of the vulnerable
In an already
Dysfunctional
Damaged
World
They play the free speech card
Like jokers
In the pack
Like wolves
Baiting us
Yet we have already
Become
The worm
On the hook
Wriggling hopelessly
And here's the rub
We are also the fish
Biting
Part of the medias
Food chain of despair
As we watch on
Living
In our goldfish bowl
Of lock down
Awaiting our small
Crumbs of hope

by Jemia

Today
I was awoken
Not by
The sounds
Of silence
But by the sounds
Of sirens
And seagulls
Like a screaming choir
In a frantic
Chaotic
Harmony

by Jemia

Sometimes
I doth not know
My derriere
From my elbow
Hardly, forsooth
A funny bone
Doth ache so
Remains
A lesser beast
With such sciatic
Derriere pains
Oh!

by Jemia

A Silence

I sensed before
Making my calls today
That they
Would have their own
Destiny of sadness
And disarray
One taken to hospital
This morning
Not without warning
And the next
And last call
Her husband had died (06-12-2021)
And had his funeral
Only yesterday (20-12-2021)
We talked for quite a while
And i think i made her smile
As we jested
At our mutual dislike
Of technology, and the like
A few other calls beforehand
That usually answered
Lay in an uneasy silence
Of forbidden Foreboding
During debrief, later
It was said
It's that time of year
Asked if i was okay
I said i think so
I'd had my own echoes
Of silent tears
Over many lonely long lost years

by Jemia

Averse

If i write
A bad poem
I don't throw it
All away
As all it was
Is the birth
Of a good idea
That went into
Disarray

by Jemia

Zoom
Or zoosk (uk adult dating site)
Either way
We're all in
A zoo
Best not to mention
Zoonosis
It's catching
In this goldfish bowl
Mostly concrete jungle
That we call
Earth
There's no escape
From this zoo

by Jemia

As science
Further progresses
Into the intelligence
Of animals
Great, and small
Land, sea, and sky
And that they all
Have their own language
That one day
Science
Will learn to translate
In a way
What it is, they have to say
I wonder what these first words would be
And their perception
Of humanity........
'You are monsters!
Cruel
Greedy
Barbaric
Destructive
Ruthless
And those mostly responsible
For your plight
Are those in power
That give fright
Then flight'
And as this small
Beautiful
Goldfinch
Finished speaking
Its small, big, tiny heart
Broke, Then stopped beating

by Jemia

The owl, that came in from the cold
A tapestry of colours, from a papier mache mould
A beautiful birthday gift to behold
For when i'm sixty four, plus one years old!
With my name on it's derriere, so neatly scrolled
It's inspired this poem, as it unfolds
(Anything ending in 'old', is easy to rhyme, or so ive been told!)
A thanks to a Rose, for a gift, that is gold

by Jemia

One wild
And starry, starry, night
Above my head
Where i lay
Within my lying bed
With curtains
And legs
All askew
The moon
Cast its shadows
Of a different hue
As hormone levels
Like the tides
Ebbed, and flowed
My stargazy eyes
Glistened
With anticipation
Beneath the pulsing moon
Aroused curiosities
That all to soon
I was floating
And drifting
Into the night sky
Now, no longer
Feeling shy
As moistened memories
Awakened my soul
I needed not
To cajole, my whole
As i drifted off
To a special place
Revealed only
By the look of ecstacy
Upon my face

by Jemia

Ears of dogs
Cropped
One man said
That he was
A dog whisperer
I thought
Along with my expletives deletives
How can you whisper
To a dog
When you've
Chopped
And cropped
It's ears off
Does his money making
Sickness
Know no bounds?
What next?
Wings of birds?
Or perhaps
Soul
Of this dog whisper?
Obviously to late
Genetically engineered pets
Is trending

by Jemia

My Three Days (Daze) Of Christmas (Over Ten Days)

On the first day of Christmas past
I made one bottle of Mead last
Said to someone, wearing reindeer horns
"You're looking ***** tonight" no porns
Went outside to vape, yay merrily
Got passed something interesting, of my tree, yay verily!

On my second day, of christmas present
Drank two bottles of Mead so pleasant
Demonstrated time flying, using a xmas tree clock ornament
The intended catcher dropped it, no time for this tournament
I later broke into tears, all full of emotions
Drowned in my sorrows, that filled the worlds oceans

On the third day of my christmas future, that's been
I turned up the same, as a hippy chic queen
Was bestowed with an halo, and angel wings
Drank tea, ate munchies, did a quiz, and that kind of thing
Although my sciatica, has come back with a vengeance
Had a really lovely day, perchance

On the fourth day of christmas, in all
Past, present, and future, i had a ball
Although i failed making time fly, tis done
Overall, i think, i mostly had fun
Experienced a myriad of emotions, good, bad, and covered in clover
My celebrations, this year, are now finally over

So merry christmas, one, and all
Enjoy yourselves, and try not to fall
Don't drink to much, or throw clocks high
Especially fragile christmas tree ones, although time did kind of fly
And if anyone offers you, a smoke-able non-oven ready joint
Well, it's interesting venturing into wormholes, losing the plot, then the point!

by Jemia

Like petals
Unfolding
Under the first light
Of a new day
As the open arms
Of love
Warm
And welcoming
Until the petals
Begin to fall
Gently at first
Gliding
To the soft earth
Below
Nature soon disowns you
As vampire bees
Pass you bye
As you age
And rot
And eventually die

by Jemia

That wownow moment
When something wows you
Right now
Well
What did you expect?
A poem?
Tis more profound
Than words
But so is chocolate custard!

by Jemia

A Tribute To Jay

Ning nang nicky, och aye the noo
Here's a little ditty, written for you
For your support, at Lets Get Working
Assisted me, with my litter pick, nobody shirking
Referred me initially, to Arts On Prescription
A wonderful place,beyond description
Organised a laptop,that had zoom connection
Had it delivered, no need for collection
Also some funding, for my post-cardiac gym
I not only got healthier, but maintained being slim
Helped with confirming, my gender reassignment surgery date
Time was running out, medical info, was running late
Also pointed me in the direction, of Carer For The Carers charity
As you knew i could help them, with my voice of clarity
Provided seeds, for my indoor garden
Apart from the tomatoes, i ask for your pardon!
And for many months, once a week on zoom
We chatted for an hour, or more, each from our lockdown room
So thank you Jay, for your helping hand
And i wish you success, in your 'pastures new' land
And also a thanks, for the paper, and pens
My life has been enriched, with you as a friend

by Jemia

Christmas
Has
Really
Interfered
Substancially
To
My
Altruistic
Se­x

by Jemia

Tonight
I heard a song
That kissed
The night sky
And left me
With the desire
To fly
So i flapped my arms
And crossed
The moonlit seas
Like an echo
Sailing on the breeze

by Jemia

Mindless

Ive searched
All morning
High
And low
Looked
Here
And there
And everywhere
But
As much
As i try
I
Think
I
May of lost
My
Mind

by Jemia

The Drag-on Dragon Queen

A dragon, with drag on
Although rarely seen
Beneath its scaly skin
She was a dragon queen

She danced the dance fandango
Whilst eating vindaloo
Her firey farts, lit up the sky
And caused a hullabaloo

The dragon king, saw these shenanigans
And thought them rather daft
But despite his better judgement
He laughed, and laughed, and laughed

The dragon king, then joined his sister
Putting on a pink tutu
Quaffed some ale, and cider
And ate some vindaloo

What happened next, i cannot say
And it cannot even be guessed
But by all accounts, it didn't end well
AS dragons with drag on, will never be a-dressed

by Jemia

Super cramp
And sciatica
Sweet dreams
Waiting to happen
Writing
Whilst writhing
Is not a happy pastime
I want to sleep
Not weep
I'm not suffering terribly
Just terribly uncomfortable
Sufficient to keep me awake
And feel the misery
But knowing
That as i age
Things won't improve
Funny
I was just on the cusp
Of sleep
The periphery of my dreams
With pains of an different ilk
Not on my derriere
Or cramping my feet
And style
Something afoot
For awhile

by Jemia

I used to break the ice at parties
Last night
All i managed to do
Was break a grandfather clock
Christmas tree decoration
In my attempt
To physically demonstrate
How time flies
Unfortunately
The person
I threw it to
Didn't catch it
I then looked on in horror
As did the audience
Who witnessed
Both time flying
And time standing still
As the grandfather clock
Christmas tree decoration
Fell to the floor
And broke into a million pieces
Leaving
Just the remnants of time
Scattered
I played with time, and lost
Time to go

by Jemia

Yesterday
As i took my
My ******* to the bins
I discovered
Much to my surprise
A supermassive black hole
Had appeared on my doorstep
Accompanied by
A variety of galaxies
Exo planets
And star forming regions
Thinking on my feet
I thought this will save me
Walking to the bin
And thence
Threw all my *******
Into the supermassive black hole
Wondering
If this may perhaps
Be a possible solution
To off-loading all the crap
That's currently around us
So maybe NASA
Could design
A giant supermassive space dump truck
Head it towards the black hole
And voila, or eureka
A tidy planet
And act like a plug to the black hole
Thus saving us
From being ****** in
Several billion years from now
Well i do like
To think outside the box....

by Jemia

Silent Night
I know
What is awaiting me
Whilst i'm enjoying
Whilst it's here
The moment
The noise
Of company
And entertainment
The chit chat
That come Christmas week
All that will remain
Is the white noise
Of silence
As i will
Experience the quietude
Of the days
And nights ahead
And festive memories
Of Christmas pasts
And silent nights

by Jemia

The Mad Elf
Many years ago
In a land
Far, far away
Lived an elf
Who was secretly
Gay
Sometimes this made her
Happy
Sometimes this made her
Sad
But most of the time
She ate other elves
Because she was
Quite, quite
Mad
She ate them
For breakfast
She ate them
For lunch
And sometimes inbetween
She had an elvish brunch
She ate them for tea
With a side serving of brie
And also for dinner
But rarely after that
And they made her less thinner
Then one fine sunny
Snowy, rainy, dry, wet, day
She saw her reflection
In a rambling talkative brook
And realised
Upon a second look
That she was in fact
A troll

by Jemia

I wonder if vampires
***, or poo
With so much quaffing
Of claret, or blood
If they bite me
My blood may be
Either honey Mead
Or Vindaloo
Flavour
Which could turn them
Kind of funny
And not much to savour
Fang you very much

by Jemia

So many people
Seem to refer to me
As he
With no malicious intent
I know
It's just my voice
No voice training
Because of heart stuff
So became a priority of choice
Perhaps
If i cut out my tongue
And thus be mute
I wouldn't be defined
By my voice
but this wouldn't be
Particularly cute
Every time though
I hear myself called he
My heart sinks
Into a wayward, silent misery
My big bang
Would be
When i have the voice
Of my heart, and soul
Which is she
Meanwhile
I shall have to survive
The Cosmic Dark Ages
In which to thrive

by Jemia

A mostly good day
And evening
A triad
Of Christmas reasoning

The first, i invited a friend
I cooked an Christmas dinner
It came together
Nice meal, that wouldn't make us thinner!

Then the zoom
Christmas charity blast
Had fun with a quiz
In which i came last!

Then whisked myself off in a taxi
For more fun, and frolics
To the acting shebang xmas do
Smoked a joint en route, then talked *******!

It's now gone 3am
In the morn
Recovered my head
From a passing unicorn......

by Jemia

I have always
Had the mind
Of a woman
And now mostly
A body
To match
But still
My voice
Is not my choice
There's always a catch

by Jemia

Influenced...
i ventured out tonight, i was prepared for being aloin(quite funny typo!), alone! so had taken pen, and paper with me, and irony played it's teasy card, as although i had nothing to write, all night! someone in need, laid such a bitter seed, and
asked me for a pen! such bitter cheek,
that i so meek,
had no quill
in which to thrill
broadly speaking
With no squeaking,
i had lost my ****** pen
a poet without a pen
is like a butterfly
without wings
Jemia X 🦋

I aspire to be an eagle
But glad i'm not the snake
And settle for stinging myself
As i lie here wide awake

The snakes are sly, and slippery
Whilst the eagles soar high above
The scorpio scorpion that i am
Dreams of an intensive love

by Jemia

I once, or thrice
Had ***
Between the groynes
As waves
Of pleasure
Teased our *****

As we
Danced around
Upon the shingle
The sensuous sea
Breezes caressed
Our supple ******* began to tingle

Our screams
Of pleasure
Upon the beach
Were lost
In the sounds
Of a seagulls' screech

As purposeful
Porpoises
Swam around
We left our
Imprints
Upon the sandy ground

The waves
Crashing in
Beneath the starry skies
Couldn't wash away
The memories
Of a love that never dies

by Jemia

I have a theory
About conspiracy theorists' query
That our lizard queen
Living on a flat earth, as seen
Do flat-earthers,
Furthermore furthers
That believe in a heaven, or a hell
Are these places, flat as well?
And are we so brainwashed
We cannot see, our vision kiboshed
That we are also flat
Somehow magically, just like that
Is the lizard queen
Not a human being
Is actually from an alien race
That look like Corgis, with a dog face
And that all of this, is an illusion
That proffers no simple conclusion
Just asking
Not multi-tasking

by Jemia

When i try to comprehend infinity
It kind of blows my mind
As i try to unravel the myriad layers
Knowing its birth, i shall never find

I often think on how it began
Its comprehension is beyond me
As i delve deeper, and deeper
I could search, for all eternity

Apparently, outer space is expanding
Into what, i have no idea
If space has an end
What lies on the other side, is unclear

It's been a puzzle to me
For the entirety of my life's trend
As i cannot define, or understand
That infinity, seemingly, has no end

And if there was an end, somewhere
I'd wonder what lay, on the other side
And where, or how, did everything start
I look to the stars in amazement, my eyes open wide

As i try to imagine, the beginning of the beginning
No answers can i find
My mind remains completely awestruck
If i found the answer, i'll probably lose my mind

by Jemia

4.6 million times the size of our Sun, Sgr A
Lies 26,000 light years away
This Supermassive Black Hole, to see
Lies in the centre, of our Milky Way Galaxy

Cannibalistic chaos
Time, stands still, and unfound
Like a hungry hippo
Feasting on all around

With siblings
Floating around other galaxies
A myriad of distant darknesses
Sculpturers of space, creating their odysseys

Like creative vampires
The one in our universe
Created several billion years ago
An unusual stability, and a silent in verse

This beautiful sleeping giant
A singularity awaits
For new distant worlds
That will never witness their own fates

The dawn of their time
Imprisoned forever
Immeasurable, and still mostly unknown
The black hole staying together

Will, perhaps in time
Fade away
And evaporate
Eventually seeing its last day

And die
But with a memory of its own
With wormholes
And portals, to places unknown

To its other dead self
A kind of dystopian space
In a very weird future
In some distant timeless infinite place

by Jemia

In the deep blue
Sargasso Sea
A new mutation
How come to be

Young turtles swimming
Freely, above the tide
Now carry a new mutation
That can't be denied

These young heroic innocents
With a love for ginger
Have picked up a virus
That turned them Ninja

by Jemia

I once
About thirty years ago
Spent one week
Sometime in December
Plucking turkeys
These turkeys
Were first
Hung upside down
By their feet
They then had their throats cut
And a plastic bag
Put over their heads, and neck
To collect the blood
And whilst they were in
Their final death throes
Of life
The turkey pluckers
Take over
As the feathers
Pluck easier
From warm bodies
The whole process
Seemed grotesque
And brutal
And for a brief moment
In my life
I was part of this
The following week
I was working
As an onion peeler
For a pate making company
It brought tears to my eyes
this year i'm having
My usual nut roast
Which is not dissimilar to stuffing
That i used to have
With my brutally murdered turkey
The good old days........

by Jemia

I once worked for a woman
Called Joy
I was her
"Advertising Manager!!!"
She kept bouncing (boing!)
My pay cheques
(like yoyo's)
There was little joy in that
Her ironic surname
Purslow
She had a slow purse....

by Jemia

I glance out of my window
I see the raindrops
Little globules
Like trickling tears
I am sad
As i cannot now do
What i was hoping to do
The wet, and windy weather
Now imprisons me
The cheerless cold
Rain has stopped play
I shall not create
Any automatons today
No art, or comfortable company
A treasured moment
Cut short
The raindrops
Still trickle down
Without malice
I shall instead
Venture down
Another rabbit hole
Like Alice

by Jemia

As i crawl out of my burrow bed
Into the cool chill of my room
I greet this cold
With a two-fingered salute
Accompanied by a few expletive deletives
And dress
Hurriedly
Already, my hands
And feet
Feel cold
The hot water bottle
Perhaps with a twisted humour
And irony
Burns my derriere
I grab my tea
Which is already cooling
At a rapid rate
I am tempted
To return
To my den of iniquity
My boudoir
To the snug comfort
Of my burrow bed
I envy
Those creatures
That hibernate
Lucky sods
Imagine
Being able to sleep
Through the cold dark months
Save a fortune on heating bills
And then spend that fortune
On enjoying the warm seasons
Goodnight October
Good morning April

by Jemia

The Genzing Gardens Pip
One day
When a small seed
Has grown
Maybe twenty, to thirty years from now
A future Isaac Newton
Perhaps, somehow
Will wander
Within a small park
For a lark
And admire the array
Of flowering nature
And blossoming trees
On display, respondent in their beauty
Whilst pondering
On scientific thingies
Looking for
Just that one moment
Of true inspiration
The Spring
Becomes Summer
Summer turns to Autumn
And still
The ignition key of inspiration
Lies dormant
As a dead dandelion
Until one cool  icy blue-skied day
He sits beneath an apple tree
His thoughts meandering
At that moment
An apple falls
As destiny calls
And hits him squarely on the head
He is rushed to hospital
And upon arrival
And much recovered
Declares
"Eureka!" (no bathwater involved)
" Do not ponder beneath apple trees in Autumn!"
Sometimes wisdom
Needs physical intervention!

by Jemia