Tossing and turning, the air so hot and humid;

No sound, but for the whirring of the fan.

My thoughts are so busy and take me to the future and also to the past,

I feel sadness then excitement, happiness, joy and it takes my breath away..

So many emotions fighting with each other it makes me dizzy,

I feel every beat of my heart, it pounds so hard I can see the rise and fall in my chest.

It aches for the ones I have loved and lost;

It aches for the new love I have found.

Laying here in my bed, I make peace with my emotions,

It is an honour and a privilege to have been able to love and be loved so completely.

Love is not a given in life, yet, I have been dealt the winning hand twice.

I finally feel content and safe and accept this new love that consumes me.

The time of our lives ahead of us
Had our good times in the past
But we still have a lot to give
And time goes by so fast

We all deserve a second chance
In love and fun and laughter
To feel the warmth and the sweet caress
Finding happily ever after

Holding hands and stealing a kiss
The feeling of butterflies
To be held in the arms of a lover
And sharing the lows and highs

Hold me tight and kiss me Everything will be alright
Lets make love from sunset to sunrise
Come closer and turn out the light

Amongst the boxes, the cobwebs, the papers and the dust
I sit here alone taking time to adjust
The chapters of my life that I can't throw away
Good stories and bad trying to keep tears at bay

At this point in my life I'm so happy and alive
Yet the past it still haunts me and it's hard to derive
How far I have come and where I want to be
To take life by the horns and be happy and free

So much on my mind it whizzes round in my head
New love in my life, new career ahead
My boy also making decisions in his life
Sometimes it feels too much and it cuts like a knife

Then all of a sudden I sit and I smile
As I realise my world's not a mountain to climb
It's a series of little green hills that's all
That I climb with my loved ones who catch me when I fall

Toolboxes, pictures, clothes and more stuff
Where do I start this is gonna be tough
A bag for charity, the skip and to keep
A wall I've to climb cos it's all in a heap

Why didn't I sort it before I moved in
It's a lifetime of **** that I couldn't bin
And now the pile's grown and in disorder
I've even kept my old recorder

Its hard to decide what to throw away
So much reminds me of another day
I need to be ruthless, I have to do this
What doesn't matter and what will I miss

An old ***** box just full of old pics
Remembering that day when I was only 6  Over to the keep side, the skip pile still bare
Why is decluttering so hard, it's not fair


Another pile of clothes that don't even fit
The last time I wore it I looked like a ***
So why have I kept it, why is it still here
Now I remember and start to shed a tear

What on earth is this, a bit of old plastic
Oh yes, a souvenir when I danced the night fantastic
It looks like junk just a bit of old debris
But to me it triggers an old happy memory

I've now been rummaging here for a while   It's made me cry and it's made me smile
Over to the keep side, the skip pile still bare
Why is decluttering so hard, it's not fair

I sit here drinking whisky
With the lights down low
Soft music playing
Thinking where my life might go
Its funny how my mind works
When I have the time to think
In my own little bubble
Where my head and heart don't sync
I try to peace together
The thoughts that just appear
But my heart keeps taking over
And sometimes the fear
Of what might be my future
And the path I'm meant to take
If my head or heart will win
And praying neither break

The rules of golf are simple they said
I listened, it all went over my head
10 Basics of the game, pay attention
Listen carefully to what I mention;
14 clubs in your bag, no more!
It could cost penalty strokes (Rule 4-4)
Play within parameters of the tee
2 shots in stroke play is the penalty
Oh my God, who art in heaven
Don't want to be breaking Rule 11
Mark your ball don't play the wrong 1
Thats a 2 stroke penalty Rule 15-1
God forbid if you break the rules of the green
There's a couple of key rules Rule 17
Rule 13-1 play your ball as it lies
Unless the rules allow you to do otherwise
Unplayable lies could get a penalty of 1 stroke
Rule 28 oh my lord it's no joke
No way back from Out of Bounds
Rule 27-1b only 5 mins to be found!
It's a sociable game, but a solitary one
No seeking advice Rule 8-1
Striking the ball no spoon, scrape or flick
Rule 14-1 don't act like a *****
Score correctly, disqualified if a fix
Make sure it gets signed Rule 6-6
Even the professionals can get it wrong they say
So I packed up my clubs and signed up to Ebay

My mind is wondering off again, it happens all the time
No matter what I'm doing, to another land I climb
This land is so hypnotic, it makes me feel alive
It wraps me up in cotton wool and floats me on a high
I float through sensory spaces, every part of me is touched
It spins me round so slowly, nothing in this land is rushed
This land is where I want to stay, a haven that feels safe
This land that I call HOPE is my amazing grace

I'm looking out the window, clouds and birds go by
I haven't seen a plane for days, they're not allowed to fly
People are in hiding, afraid to go outside
I took a walk for excercise, not a soul in sight
I miss the friendly faces, the hugs and how are you?
The sadness of so many lost, it breaks my heart in two
But the country came together,
To make a better place
So when we all come out of this, we'll be proud of the human race

Let me be your shelter
Let me walk beside you
Let me hear you want me
As I want you too

Let me make you happy
Let me catch your tears
Let me hold you close to me
And banish all your fears

Let me be your only
Let me make your heart skip
Let me gaze in your eyes
And taste your sweet lips

Let me feel your body
Let me touch you everywhere
Let me rejoice in your arms
And always be there

Let me love you gently
Let us be a team
Let me sleep beside you
And share the dream

Many weeks of lockdown are they coming to an end
When we get back to society will we ever comprehend
How these past months have changed us and what we have achieved
The world has pulled together could we ever have believed
That so many nations suffered and we grieved together as one
A future history subject when this is all over and done
This truly is another war, a fight we all endure
Many lives being lost as we still fight to find a cure
May the 8th marked VE Day 75 years since the 2nd world war
And we still found time to commemorate because everyone is worth fighting for

Its hard to think that you will love again someday
When your heart has been broken and you have lost your way
But know you will be happy again once more my friend
Your life full of joy and love as your heart begins to mend

My garden is so quiet but for the faint buzz of a bee
A bluetit lands upon the bush just to the left of me
It doesn't seem to be afraid so young just from the nest
It sits and fluffs its feathers and puffs out its little chest
The sun is shining down on us we both sit here in peace
The world outside my garden still not safe from this disease

This time last year I wasn't sure of what might lay ahead
I'd sit and think of my journey with my virtual A to Z
Not knowing where it would take me and which map I had to choose
But, I had to start the journey, I had nothing left to lose

I followed many winding roads and crossed some rocky paths
Sometimes I thought I couldn't go much further, then at last
A hope on the horizon, my destination getting near
And there you were in front of me, a light so bright and clear

Well, 3 months have passed and we're still going strong
I knew I had chosen the right from the wrong
The symmetry between us has shown we are good
It looks like the signs say we could and we should!

It feels like I've known you for longer than this
Cos when I close my eyes it's you that I miss
My life's become your life it all seems so clear
I feel such complete love and safe when you're here

The sound of your voice and the touch of your skin
Sends a volt to my heart and my head in a spin
My whole body aches with a love and desire
I tremble in your hold while the spark feeds the fire

Dear Covid-19, I don't understand
Where did you come from? How did you land?

What are you made of? Why are you here?
The damage is done now, so please disappear!

Everyone's hurting, you've punished enough?
Why do you linger? Why are you so tough?

We've committed no crime, but a sentence we suffer!
You came with such force, and we had no buffer!

You've created a war that we can't comprehend,
Fights for no reason with family and friend

A self isolation we've had to endure
Many hearts broken, please Covid, no more!!

Dear Covid-19, I promise you now,
We will find an answer and expel you somehow.

Rain can appear in many different guises
Can be welcome, unwanted and full of surprises
Gentle April showers on a fresh Spring morn
Thunderous big drops on a Summers dawn
Blown in the wind on a fierce Autumn gale
A freezing cold Winter when it turns into hail
Creates a stunning rainbow when its playing in the the sun
Or cause a mighty flood when the drops join into one
It can take lives or save them depending on its mood
Wash away a village or help them grow their food
Never underestimate the powers of the rain
It's a force that can't be reckoned with and cannot be restrained

What day is it?
What time is it?
Where am I?
Where are you?
We're all in lockdown,
Difficult times,
Trying to get through!
How many weeks?
How many more?
I'm doing all I can,
To stay safe & healthy,
For when I meet that man,
Whose picked me up,
Spun me around,
Made me feel alive,
Such crazy times
We're living in,
When will that day arrive?

Trees are like humans they need space to breathe
They reach for the skies and spread shade underneath
Ray's of dappled sunshine spill through their boughs
They stand tall and sturdy protecting the house
The green shoots of Spring grow a Summer display
The deep reds of Autumm keeping Winter at bay
When Winter arrives and they are covered in snow
They are secretly preparing for next years show
So just like a human, if you give love and care
They'll keep giving pleasure for as long as they are there

What is happening to me
Why do I feel this way
Am I getting in too deep
My life is all array
My head is all mixed up
My emotions up and down
I can't work out what's going on
I'm spinning round and round
One minute I am on cloud nine
The next I'm in a storm
I'm caught up in a whirlwind
And my heart is being torn
I find myself just drifting off
I'm in another place
But then I come back down to earth
My heart begins to race
Could it be that I've found love again
Can't be, it's far too soon
But I recognise the feelings
As I lay here in my room
I tingle with excitement
With the buzzing of my phone
Please take things slow I tell myself
I'm in the danger zone