Although you have often advertised yourself as an occasional stock trader, your everyday mood was linked to the stock market's fortune's, implying an innate desire for money.
Your narrative of life often treaded the familiar path of joy, despair, death etc But your exclusion of self discovery as the real objective of life was a deliberate attempt on your part to portray life as an end in itself, and a lost cause at that.
Filled with delight. There were no obvious causes. Around me, it felt like joy was everywhere. Life seemed straightforward for a moment. I know these feelings are ephemeral, though, deep down. But it is difficult to understand why we sometimes feel such jolts of emotion.