Sitting here I'm waiting for the parcel man to call
It's coming here from China so again I hear **** all
I've had enough of leaflets being force fed through the door
A letter comes for Mrs Jones who ****** off years before
So as I read the farmfoods' latest offers brightly lit
A pizza and kebab from uber eats and other ****
A knock comes on the letterbox at last my pressie's here!
But nah ten secs ain't quick enough and Yodel disappear


Johnnie
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The siren's wailing proudly as it breaks the silent night
A roaring of excitement as the squad have taken flight
The blues are flashing brightly adding colour to the air
Their pizza's must be ready cause they can't wait to get there
Oh I've got extra anchovies said Adrian to ****
Well mine's the one with extra cheese and onion said Rick
Let's eat 'em in the lay-by where the tracking's blocked said Phil
And whack it on expences so the force can foot the bill


Johnnie
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It's like I've known you ages though we haven't even met
Our words have brought us close without our eyes contacting yet
The warmth flowed through our fingers and excited every line
A much needed connection that is only yours and mine
Life is so much brighter now I have you in my day
The Sun arrived when you appeared and cleared the clouds away
Who knows what the future holds, what will be will be
Whichever way my precious one you'll still be here with me


Johnnie
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Another ******* year's gone by I'm fifty five years old
I've tried so hard to **** it up a natural so I'm told
But I'm still here and smiling so I'll **** you off some more
With ******* flowing freely from my heart just like before
A miracle I'm here at all and so I'll write this book
You might not like the words you read but I don't give a ****
Today's the day it started oh so many years ago
My stage was lit to take no **** and **** the status quo


Johnnie
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I'm here I'm gonna make it count I've got no ******* choice
No matter what I do the world will always hear my voice
It might ******* the people that I meet along the way
Well tough if they don't like it they can **** right off away
My words can't be disputed cause I'm always ******* right
I've got no time for ******* they can stick their ******* *****
My peace was interrupted when the ******* brought me here
So from my stage I'll **** them all before I disappear

Johnnie
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My line was straight and stable at the time when I came in
It moved both ways through joy and pain but then returned again
The ups the downs were in control as child turned into youth
My home life changed and left me with a longing for the truth
A Devil in disguise took me too high above the ground
I felt so good but fell below the line when I came down
It took so long for me to find my way back to the base
I can not risk the pleasure so he's gone without a trace
So now my many highs are real the lows are very few
The level's always in my mind the balance always true

Johnnie
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Stop the world I wanna get off the quote to say *******
My life is more important now than anything you do
I am the only one you see and things are done my way
If anybody argues they can **** right off away
Don't take the **** don't take the hype I'll make it on my own
I am the most important soul that you have ever known


Johnnie
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