Hidden but not hiding
I worry about my soul
If it is involved anymore
Or just keeping score,
If  I get something for struggling
Barefoot up this mountain
When I could have worked harder
And saved up
For some climbing boots
And not left my gloves, obviously,
I don't know where
And not let my hat fly off
In the first gust of wind
And thrown away my sunglasses
Because she wanted to see my eyes,
And maybe it will whisper to me
In the dead of night
And I'll remember why I'm here
And get a few points
For blisters.

The Robin is not singing for me,
Better hold my breath
While I eavesdrop.
The path beneath my step
Is not worn away
For my convenience
But I'll keep my head down,
Hope nobody sets a dog on me.
The wind in the trees
Isn't puffed for my hair,
But, what's left of it,
Feels it's stirrings
And I hope my body,
So close to the launch pad,
Doesn't hinder the gusts
Trying to set free a balloon.
I take comfort that the Cumulus
Is leaving nothing to chance,
It  has brought along
It's own blue heaven
To drift along in,
But I'm pretty sure
It would be doing it anyway,
And the river is not even flowing
In my direction,
Still, I will keep noticing things
Listening in to my life.
Someone up ahead calls out a name,
One that I have been known by,
But it wasn't meant for me,
Just another happy coincidence.

I haven't made the anthologies and journals,
My novel won't be in
The book stores any time soon,
My songs didn't get me a recording deal,
The screenplays never graced the big screen,
And I expect if I write you a last love note
It will suffer a similar fate.
And to think I had all the same letters
As everyone else
All I had to do was jiggle them around a bit,
Arrange  them in such a way
That they might mean something
To somebody.

We saw the beauty
And wonder
When we had eyes
And held hands
When we had fingers,
When our bodies tricked us
Into being alive.
And we walked on
When we had legs
And kissed
When we had lips
And said words
When we had ears
And started to believe
In things we couldn't
See or touch,
And we threw ourselves away
When our bodies tricked us
Into dying.

I thought we would always
be ...
Like ham and cheese
Sausage and mash for peas
A double somersault on the trapeze
A warm snap after the freeze
A thank you after a please
A soothing cream for scuffed knees
A handkerchief for a sneeze
A cure for a disease
A pocket for loose keys
Honeysuckle and foxglove for bees
Shelter and shade for trees
A lace curtain for the breeze
...together.

It's all about settling
For less,
The cake tin and juice box are
empty
So we make do
With a biscuit
And water,
And now you have
Brought him on for me
I too have to make
Some substitutions.
The rustling leaves
Will now wake me
And not your touch,
The first rays of the sun,
Giving me false hope
In the grey bleakness,
Will be the smile
I will never trace again
With my fingers.
Later, if I'm lucky,
I can take a cloudless blue sky
Instead of your beauty
And the soft evening rain on
My face and lips
Will be your whispers.
The stars of course
Will remind me of
How far away you are,
I'll settle for that.