I drop my frozen tears into
my cup of wine for comfort.
I pray for your soul and visit
you often at your grave to
share gossip and heal my
heart just one more time.

She always had a place in her heart just for me.
  I don't know why but she never judged me. She had
  me and my ***** wife stay at her mansion open arms.
  She knew things about my life I was too young to know.
  My war torn father had PTSD anger I was too young for.
  She was gentle and kind. She knew things I never knew.

You seem to hate me. Have we met?
  You call me horrible names and wish
  me dead. I'm not a ****. Have we met?
  I reach out. bjdonovan50@hotmail.com
  Dare to touch my soul and talk to the
  devil you think I am. Let's be friends.

Grandma taught me everything I know
    that really matters. Irish to her boots.
    She was kind to everyone, never spoke
    ugly and took me to special places.
    We took the El to the track. She showed
    me ways to win and ways to lose.
    We stopped for ice cream before we
    went to her bar full of friends.
    They all fussed over me and filled me
    to my top with Cherry Cokes.
    I never saw such happy people again.
    We caught the last train home and
    she tucked me in bed and kissed me night.
    She said life's a pie full of comedy and
    tragedy. Eat it all and you'll die happy.
    She died. I laughed when I kissed her bye.

Maybe it's my insecurity or your indifference.
We pretended as long as we could but our true
selves had to break out from the masquerade.
Bared **** at the party. Wasn't that my show?

Sister ******

    Strung out full of needle marks
    still proud defiant and sneering
    with black teeth and bag of bones
    you say "*******". So I go away.
    I come back in the morning. You're
    gone to emergency or morgue? I try
    to find you for our kids' sake. We love
    you but we can't compete with ******.

They were bigger than life
  and moved mountains to bend
  time and possibility for a
  future we never imagined.
  They're long gone but we
  still know e=mc2. We all
  orbit around sun and God
  might or might not be dead.