I look in my mirror and talk
to the old man staring at me.
Why are you smiling? Death
is not far away. We wasted
our best years. We chased
her and lived in bars and
racetracks and funerals of
broken souls just like us.
We keep smiling and tuck
another Ace in our sleeve.

Set up the chess board for us.
String barbwire between us.
Introduce Gatling guns to the battle
and make it a meat grinder and weeks
become months become years and it
seems there are no pieces left to save.
Widows and orphans and lovers all
weep for their ghosts in our cellars.
The broke men who returned had
lost limbs and most of their minds.

Do you still have a pulse and goodness in your heart?
Do you have loved ones? Do you have regrets?
Do you have failures? Do you wish upon stars?
Do you scoff at Disney? Yeah, me too.
Let's live our real lives from this second on.
Let's meet in bars and dance naked and
huff and puff in bed and let us die
in our ****** with abandon.
While they all live on
down in the street below.

In some long ago mall in a photo booth
we left proof of undying love you kiss
my cheek and I smile happier than ever.
I have it in my wallet 30 years later.
I write these lines looking at young lovers
who've forgotten how to really love.

She and I shared a heartbeat.
We loved the same ice cream
and music and movies and
wanted kids and to elope and
hated our parents but loved us.

We had a fight.
He was tired and spent
and I was frisky and bent.
I felt rejected. Ugly and fat
and my insecurities lashed out.

What are the rules?
Who has the high ground?
Who falls on the sword?
Who breaks the silence?
He moved out and I lost.

I always wanted to make
  everyone laugh out loud.
  I'd slip and fall down on
  purpose so they'd love me.

Roadmap to painless suffering.
Do penance for just being born
through a birth canal into Coney Island
where everything is fun
and Leave it to ****** Church
gives ****** for communion.
Embrace the fog and forget you
ever doubted. Drive your bus.
Deliver us all to our evils.
Punch transfers to mortal sins.