SITTING ON THE PORCH

we are sitting side by side, in our chairs on the porch
enjoying the late afternoon, sipping sweet tea, cool
and refreshing- it was another hot day, the mosquitos
quit buzzing  once the fans began pushing the air
around it was then, i reached over for her hand, thinking
it the right compliment to end the day, she quickly
slapped my hand away, a sudden rebuff of my gesture
i tried again, and she did the same, i was taken aback
she looked at me as if i were a stranger- then went inside
i suddenly remembered something the doctor had said at one
of her last doctor visits- at some point she will not remember
even who you are, with that the triggers in my brain reacted
anew, as the night of the day took hold and swallowed me up

by Michael Perry

TO MY SON, WHO TURNED 30

you are most like me, really, sometimes
it's like looking in the mirror, we have  
the same kind of self-effacing smile, our
ability to think of everyone but ourselves
our hearts in the right place, we show it
often, others might take offense, thinking
it to be overbearing, we mean well, it's our
way, which i hope will not be your burden
if anything, to be helpful to you, so on this day
it got me thinking, of the things i wish i could
have changed about me to be better for you, like
me not being there,  when you  needed me most
school events, your ball games, i wish i could
turn back the clock, on your disappointment in me
and my nonchalance about other things being more
important than you,  i should have made the time
also i wish i told you how much i love you, as i cherish
you  now, as the person you are, and the man you
have become; yes, we say it to each other now on
the phone, because we live so far apart,  but i believe
we truly mean it when we say it , so i am writing this
so that one day, when i am gone, and you look ahead
with your own children, you will  see what it all means
everything becomes so crystal clear, your eyes open  
wide and you accept the new reality that you have
a family,  i did that at first, but lost track of space and time
thinking, there was always next time, and next, so as
you read  my words, don't take anything for granted
because you will miss out on so much- be less like me
and more like you don't hold back, cherish the moments
budget your time, ask questions, follow through, learn
from your mistakes for there is nothing wrong with
having what you want, you are honest to a fault
you wear your heart on your sleeve it's your
badge of honor, cherish it, claim it, live life
fully, follow your dreams, be happy, go where
life takes you, cherish even the tiniest of
insignificant things before they are gone
so don't be like me-old and wishing what if, be
like you, forever looking forward with never a regret

by Michael Perry

I WATCH

i watch, from my window
as the winds begin to pickup
off the bay, to rise and swirl
in clouds of dust and speck
gritty and pinging through the eaves
of this old house, forever battered
and weathered year and year
from storm after storm but still
regardless of the storm or the season
i watch, as the power lines whip and crackle
like strands of tormented licorice, as the lights
in the room, flicker off and on, i prepare
myself once more for the onslaught that is natures
way of giving everyone the *******, and still
i cant help myself, i take the abuse and i watch

by Michael Perry

SOMETHING TO PROVE

i had something to prove to myself
to you, i wanted to be
upfront, tell you how i really felt
only my words failed, my tongue
scorched;  unable to utter
what needed to be said, at the
moment, it needed to be said, wanting
to take you in my arms and hold you
like i should, the right thing to do, but
i came across cold and cowardly- in that moment
unable to meet your love half way
a moment that should have counted for more
until our eyes met, in that next moment
you kissed my lips tightly knowing they were
alcohol-laced, then you turned and left the room

by Michael Perry

WISH UPON A STAR

the sky is beginning to darken
just enough for the stars to
make their appearance, putting
on a show they are twinking
on and off in a ritual, old as life itself
we two are standing close watching
holding hands, we continue looking up
at the dark and the light, illuminate
all around, filling the night
with millions of heavenly bodies
craving an audience, then from right to left
a falling star begins its decent,  i tell her
hurry, make a wish, she closes her eyes
and does just that  i tell her i hope
your wish comes true, she whispers
back breathlessly, it already has

By Michael Perry

SUMMER COTTAGE

you gave me your heart, i gave you mine, we took it when
we were both young greedily, wonton, expectant, being carefree
life was ours and now as the years have tolled on, we know nothing lasts forever, in fact it seems to speed up, we see it as
the age gathers around us, in our faces , on our wrinkled hands
mine shakes from time to time, now, through the open window
coming in gold shafts of light, to high-light the bedroom, chests
of draws, pale curtains, a large canopy bed, fill up the space
nothing fancy, our style,  as the air filters through the open window
salty and  pungent as it is want to do around here, i can hear the ocean calling in the distance as we are just a mile from where the bay meets the ocean, we make this trek year after year, to our summer cottage our special place to get away from it all, still as you lay asleep, peaceful i let you slumber on, couldn't bare to wake you this early, although i know you will be disappointed, not to see the sun rise, still, as i watch you sleep your skin reflects translucent against the  white pillow case, offset by your long silver hair, that i   remember was auburn shade you had  for many years, the color of  chestnuts like we used to pick in the fall as they came down covering the yard..still the memories flood, today will be a good day though, i am sure of it, i have an intuition about such things, then, i hear you stirring, and you open your eyes, and we both smile i am done daydreaming for now about what if's, as we get ready to make breakfast  and take our daily walk down to the beach, we are settled on what we have, staying expectant, knowing still, there will be a time that for both of us, will come, knowing there are some things that never will change, if only we could turn back time

by Michael Perry

GETTING A GRIP

the air is stifling, no movement
no sound, the last of the cicadas
back underground, all around me
an uneasiness profound, i live
i breathe, in stilted stutters, like
a fish out of water i grasp and
claw at the thick air that surrounds
as my heart leaps and pounds, and
then the  softest of a breeze, if
you could call it that, comes
meekly around, but its enough
just enough to calm me down

by Michael Perry