Sometimes I get lost in the memories I made
Sometimes I get so lost I forget that time has paced since then
I forget that things have changed

I forget that there are things that separate us
There is someone that has invaded
I try to forget but late at night as I lie awake the line gets blurred

I forget my wake back to the real world
I don't want to return to the place where everything changed
How I long to stay in this memory with you forever

I long to feel you kiss on my lips
I long to hear your heart race when I was in your arms
The only place I can come close is to go back

To run back to those memories is dangerous
when I come back to reality its like feeling you leave all over again
but the feeling I have when I am there has no comparison

I never thought that I would be like this  
We had this dream of a life together
A life I was sure we would share

I never thought I would have to visit the memories of us I felt as though I would be able to always feel your kisses
but I let myself get to far ahead

Sometimes I wonder if you do the same thing...
Do you think back to what we had
do you long to feel me kiss you and hear the way my heart beat was when I was in your arms

Do you miss me falling asleep next to you
Do you miss they way I said your name
Do you miss the little things we did together

Sometimes I let my mind slip to the idea that you and I are possible
I let myself believe for a brief minute we could fix things
but then I have to remember that we are always just going to be a distant memory.

All the empty space between these walls
Filled with secrets I cant escape from
I have lost the person I used to be.

I fill all these empty rooms with self doubt
I tried to lock it all in
The rooms are filled, they leak at the seams

The more I try to run, the more I try to hide
The more I get lost inside my own mind
Running away from you has me trapped inside.

I see you there with her and the rooms inside my mind
burst open and flood every inch
I become that lost girl I never wanted to be.

I am lost inside the deep dark parts of my mind
I feel like a child walking at night
Scared of what I might find if I creep around the corner just to far.

Afraid that around the corner I might find the memories
that I try so hard to hide  
The memories of you and I

I loved you so much I almost wish I never met you
I almost wish I could erase the memories that we made
but a small part of me wants to hold on to the times we had

I want to hold on to the way you made me feel
to hold tight to the way you used to make me laugh
the way you looked at me like you had stars in your eyes

The day you left I cried
Every time I see you that memory floods my mind
my heart shattered that day when it hit the ground

The day you walked away I changed
I built walls so high
I decided the only way to protect my feelings was to not have them

I figured it would stop my heart from breaking every time I saw you
To bad those walls only shut everyone else out
but with you it kept you locked inside

I feel as though I cant escape that feeling
I feel as though this lost girl shall remain inside
Scared to move on, scared to forget

Scared that she might never feel the same way she did
the way she felt with you
Maybe that Lost Girl is who I was always meant to be

Its too late for your "I'm so sorry"
Its to late for your words coated with lies
Its far to late for your "I have changed I promise"  

You put me through so much pain
You told me it was all my fault
You made me feel worthless

I let you put me through the ringer more times then I can count
I let you tear me down brick by brick
The damage you created was catastrophic

Every part of me was destroyed
but I was so blinded by my love for you
I couldn't see all the scars you had placed on my heart

The day you left I felt my heart start to bleed
All the pain came rushing in
All the scars you placed began to hurt

I bandaged my self up and kept moving
I pretended to be fine
but with each passing day I felt the pain more deeply

No you wanna come back again
You come slithering in like a snake
Ready to strangle the life out of me

But I have become immune to your venom
The toxicity you brought to my life
Will never inhabit within me again

I have grown and became someone you have never known
I know my worth and all I have to offer to someone
That someone just is not you

I need a break
A break from these people
A break from seeing them everyday

I need time away from seeing him look at her
I need space from the voices of victory
I need to be removed form the place I am in

I can't keep living in this place anymore
I feel as though the walls are closing in on me
I feel like I can't breath

Seeing her be with him is painful
Hearing her words coated with victory when she says your name
Seeing that glimmer in your eyes when you see her walk in the room kills me

Some day I just want to be the one that someone looks at like that
I want to be the one that someone talks about
I want someone to be the one that has the victory

Until then I will sit here with the walls constricting me
I will sit here and listen to your word cutting through my flesh
I will be here wait for that day to come

Slowly I begin to pace
Why did I sign up for this
I am not ready for this

I peak through the curtain
I see a full house
My stomach begins to turn to knots

What am I gonna do?
I can't breath... I'm feeling shaky
My palms are sweating

Why am I about to preform on this stage?  
Who was it that talked me into this?
Ugh I can be so stupid sometimes

I hear the music begin to play
Quickly I take center stage
Slowly the curtain opens

I try to speck but nothing happens
I try to sing but no sound is heard
Until I look over and see your smile

Your here, You actually came
I say my line again and this time its audible
I make it through the performance with easy

Back to my dressing room I run
When I get there you are stand in the center of the room
With flowers and chocolates

I run and hug you.
It has been far to long since I have seen you.
You embrace me with open arms

I have missed you big embrace
I missed the way you smell
The way you laughed at how I got excited about little things

Slowly I being to wake up
to bad it was all just a dream
to bad your just a distant memory

The day you left you
You not only left tire marks on the road
You left them on my heart

The mark of you was left
I watched you walk out the door
With tears in my eyes

I wanted to yell
I wanted to scream
But I swallowed the lump in my throat

Tear stained eyes
Broken hearted
That's how you left me  

Three years together fell apart in seconds
Your love that once was so strong now flees from you so quickly
The day you slammed the door my heart shattered

There are times I go back to that moment
I watch you leave
I watch my heart break from outside of myself

Longing for the outcome to be different
Wishing you wouldn't race out of here so quickly
I was hoping you would turn around and come back to me

The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again
But I don't care I will continue to go back to that place
Hoping that things will change

Hope is a dangerous thing
Every time I go back with hopes high
My heart gets crushed a little more

One day when I go back
That last bit of my heart will break
But until then I shall continue to go back with hopes high