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149 · Apr 2022
The schizoid self
Emmanuel S Aporu Apr 2022
Each pair of feet sauntered peacefully along the street,
So did the streams of sweat that coursed down their faces as homage to the heat.
But all their faces were stained with a blank stare,
And their demeanor showed all the signs of despair,
The joy-sorrow balance seemed to be even;
But the wrenching agony inside them could never be hidden.

Their silences were so deep for no words were spoken.
And each heart beat as if it was already broken.
But no one was hurt – at least exteriorly,
Yet their individual anger inside churned fiercely.
That anger I tell you was every man’s only defense;
For how else would you live in such a world of indifference!
146 · Sep 2023
Lilhe Sobuko!
Emmanuel S Aporu Sep 2023
Her beauty glistens like a rare diamond,
And her smile is the other treasure we have found.
By her every embrace, we have been healed;
And every touch has had our hearts with joy re-filled!
146 · Apr 2022
Memo to a friend!
Emmanuel S Aporu Apr 2022
Only if you knew what it was,
You'd understand why I couldn't explain.
But, I'll patiently bear these woes.
And cherish every night of pain
141 · Nov 2021
Untitled
Emmanuel S Aporu Nov 2021
I whispered a thought into her ear
For there she was - close and near
But what I saw filled me with fear -
And down her cheek coursed a tear.
140 · Oct 2021
...tale of a risen sun
Emmanuel S Aporu Oct 2021
I cried till my wells were dry
I moaned till I could only sigh
My past bred fresh fears
And augmented that endless stream of tears
I was alone in the wild
But in that perpetual darkness unable to hide
Then despair embraced me
And darker tunnels I could clearly see
Day and night were alike
For that darkness ruled with might
I uttered voiceless pleas
And in vain pleaded my release
Thus continued the days
Lost in a thousand ways,
I was resigned to my fate
And all hope would have been, but late.

But one day that ‘fairest sun’ rose
And warmed me from head to toes
Penetrated me to my deepest recesses
And supplied light in unthinkable excesses
That sun stretched forth its hand
And bade me rise with polite command
That touch and the resultant feelings
Brought fresh strengths for future dealings
I was finally free though it seemed a dream
And gladness filled me to the brim
My tongue loosened so I could speak
I longed to express my joy but my mind was bleak
I gloried in that resurrection – momentous yet subtle
And all around me, I heard whispers: “the feeling is mutual!”
137 · Jul 2021
. . . despair - no more!
Emmanuel S Aporu Jul 2021
He sees a face in that darkened night
It smiles and glances down at him
He's suddenly filled with loads of delight
Is this real or is it just a dream?
He motions to that angelic figure
Which stretches its arm in a friendly gesture
The touch electrifies his whole being
And dissolves the old life he's been living
The demons flee in haste
As the figure holds him to his breast
Is this real or is it just a dream?
But his eyes are open, he sees everything
A new spirit engulfs the man
He now longs for the day and its sun
The nightly moon grins its face
The stars rain down an extra grace
The company of the rain he'll still enjoy
But this time, the tears he'll cry will be of joy!
137 · May 2023
The lies of Nami!
Emmanuel S Aporu May 2023
She lied when she said "we"
I also lied when I said "free"
She again lied when she said "forever"
For now, it's clear the word is "never!"
135 · Aug 2022
When friendship fails!
Emmanuel S Aporu Aug 2022
When that pleasure of pursuit is gone
And their hearts are not broken but torn
When all their promises fade into thin air
And each other's faults they can no longer bear
When beauty mutates into disgust
And with passion breeds hatred for the past
When togetherness becomes a catalyst for disaster
And all those fights bring no peace thereafter
When every word has its dose of malevolence
And every memory leads them to another dark place
When their souls are infected by a toxic repulsion
And gestures of love go out of fashion
When they can no longer see eye to eye
Nor walk together side by side
Then their wells of love are all dry
And that dearth they can no longer hide
When this and many other symptoms prevail
Then surely, the friendship has started to fail
135 · Apr 2022
I wonder!
Emmanuel S Aporu Apr 2022
Those lovely days; I remember
And the joy of every encounter,
And the dialogues that robbed us of sleep.

Is that all lost, I wonder!
I am shaken to the marrow and under
But I am hopeful still; for the friendship was too deep.
135 · Mar 2022
A great expectation
Emmanuel S Aporu Mar 2022
Venus deigned to bless us with a fairer princess;
And with pearls radiant adorned her face.
Thus, when mortal man was wearied by his search,
He found relief on the thirtieth day of March.
133 · Aug 2022
infinite death
Emmanuel S Aporu Aug 2022
She was trapped in an endless descent.
And that 'nadir' beckoned to her without restraint.
All her hopes of respite started to fade
when her soul of life was eternally bled.
132 · Dec 2021
What you miss when you cry!
Emmanuel S Aporu Dec 2021
Reluctant tears roll down your cheeks
And all those fears obscure your wits
The joys around you are easily missed
And your life to sorrow, a portion is leased
130 · Mar 17
the first demise
The cold blood flowed from his heart drop by drop
And every face about was a reminder of the dagger it bore
In his dark moments his slender hands would aimlessly *****
But the dearth of support hurt him deeper to the core
Emmanuel S Aporu Jan 2021
We travelled through the noisy streets
Staring at those buildings of old
I marveled at these our feats
That before were seldom told
My heart spoke and yours listened
Yet no words were needed
The response you gave was in the air
Yet produced no symphony or sound
I heard it all, loud and clear
And in it a new joy I found
I smiled and you wondered why
Then I saw from the corner of my eye
That you closed your eyes, sighed and smiled
For ‘twas true – no one lied or pried
The ‘yes’ was said silent but loud
And the friendship made me proud
Emmanuel S Aporu May 2021
When we met under favorable auspices
Starry skies and bright moon were the only witnesses
It was the dawn of a bright new age
New play, new actors for the stage
New everything - the old completely forgotten
It was like scribbling on fresh page
When this our friendship was begotten

When we met under favorable auspices
All I could see was smiling faces
The joy completely penetrated me
Then left me unnerved - longing for thee
Was it day or was it night?
All I could recall was the light
For it was blinding and surreal
I guess it meant our friendship was real

When we met under favorable auspices
In your mind were a thousand guesses
I wondered too - how close the deities could bring
Heaven closer and a marvelous song to sing
It was harmonious - a deafening symphony
I cried when my ears touched that melody
For it left my heart awed and asunder
And now, every fourth May, I shudder
127 · Mar 2022
.....thus you came!
Emmanuel S Aporu Mar 2022
Thus you came,
From the fourth heaven with a silent whisper
I could remember your name
And for my state, you were the perfect visitor.

I could recall those moments
Utterly blissful; through and through
When you freed me from bonds and torments
For no other power I knew, but you!
127 · Aug 7
In the days of light!
The wind did pause when she mentioned her name
And the sun in haste increased its light
My dark complexion was all of a sudden bright
And every moment thereafter was ne'er the same!
127 · Dec 2021
Broken wings
Emmanuel S Aporu Dec 2021
They curtail his flight
Yet he's near the first heaven
He starts to see the light
But the chills leave him frozen
He drops down to the earth
And despair fills his heart
He resolves to start again
And his efforts are blessed by the rain
126 · Aug 29
fallen heroes of Oz!
All our heroes are now dead
The blood on their skins is freshly red
We have wept and now ably comply
For our wells of tears are empty and dry!
125 · Mar 2022
By Pollux!
Emmanuel S Aporu Mar 2022
By Pollux! By Castor! By Jupiter!
By all those things that reigned over pagan men
Thou art alike those deities I fear
Shall I thence swear by thy name?

Consume me as a fire
If thou art wholly divine
Lest may this flaming desire
Free my heart from thine!
125 · Sep 12
Thank you, my friend!
Friends like you are truly heaven sent
For Oh what joy to my life you've lent
You are a treasure and so are these prizes
And so of you I'll dream - till the sun rises!
123 · May 2023
Nami!
Emmanuel S Aporu May 2023
She appears in his dreams
She resides in his heart
She's the supplier of his means
And the custodian of his hearth.

She's the catalyst to his flames
She burns silently and consumes
She's the giver of all his names
And the lover when his life resumes.

He's the beholder of her beauty
The receiver of all her graces
To love her has become his duty
For he chose her from a million faces.
122 · Jul 2022
the rising of the phoenix!
Emmanuel S Aporu Jul 2022
It lay there motionless
As if it were already dead
That great bird of many thousand years,
Brought to our eyes endless streams of tears
In remorse, we all covered our faces
For it was the finest ever bred.

The sun in cooperation rained down its rays
Then ignited flames about her to incinerate
Thus honoring a lifetime of endless frays
And leaving us mortal men to contemplate
Away went her life as if out of a lash
And all that was left, was a pile of ash.

But what we saw next amazed us;
A strange wind moving the ash
A clatter, then a cacophony
An eternal cry of seeming agony
The old passing on the spirit to the new
An eternal phoenix rising anew!
122 · Feb 2022
For all joys shortlived
Emmanuel S Aporu Feb 2022
They sparkle but only for a moment
They excite many a withered spirit
They give a false hope of release
And a prevailing semblance of ease
Their realm is that of fantasy
And never once do they harbour mercy
So, the sufferer soon returns to his torment
For their promises are never concrete
122 · May 2023
The pursuit of Nami!
Emmanuel S Aporu May 2023
Those were his worst fears.
And indeed, the pursuit ended in tears.
He now retreats to his inside,
And sits by his agony beside!
122 · Sep 2022
The Riddles of Ritho
Emmanuel S Aporu Sep 2022
Each tale revealed the mysteries we craved
For their narrator was the symbol of their salve
And since all men alike were engulfed in that verve,
It was by those rhymes that they were saved
121 · Dec 2020
Even her shadow is bright!
Emmanuel S Aporu Dec 2020
She is like the evening breeze
To which all hearts exposed readily freeze
Her smile is a permanent glow on her face
I carry that image to every place
Her heart - calm and laden with peace
Is there any as blessed as this?
Her eyes make the sun recoil in shame
The wind will pause when you mention her name
Her dress leaves the radiance of roses wanting
And her walk is to me a favorite dancing
A misnomer, but they say, "most wanted"
Who for me is splendor "most granted"
Mortal battles immortal in an eternal wrangle
Woe to me but not this slim angel
For in my darkness, she is the light
Even her shadow is bright!
118 · May 2023
The other side of Nami!
Emmanuel S Aporu May 2023
Her smile was the only clue,
It was fresh like the morning dew.
But her words were a double-edged dagger
Now, behold my heart split asunder!
118 · May 2023
The unveiling of the bride!
Emmanuel S Aporu May 2023
Our ancestors brought us here,
And blessed us with a marriage as this.
Sweet voices around us I now hear,
To mark the beginning of bliss.

Your mother won't stop smiling.
Your father is chatting with his crew.
Your brother to your sister is whispering,
"I can't believe it's true."

My heart is overflowing with love,
As your face glistens beneath its veil
All I need before me I now have
And all these things to my life will avail.
117 · May 2021
…..beyond mars
Emmanuel S Aporu May 2021
I was imbued with sentiments of a most prime birth
I was struck to the bone and further to the heart
It was as if the purple curtains had come down,
On that still Monday morning of May
For, so were we actors in that play
And now, she's gifted me with the fairest crown

Though unnerved by emotion,
It was a bright and lovely day
The pain and all the devotion,
And the moments that we paused to pray
For that, no storm couldn't we abide
And so did we tread side by side

Now I sit here staring into a lifetime,
Filled with hope, joy and bliss.
I wouldn't trade for any a dime
A friendship as marvelous as this.
So, gladly do we toast to a thousand years -
To the ethereal, beyond mars and the stars
In your own words: "Yes ..... to many more years of friendship!"
117 · Nov 2021
Thandi
Emmanuel S Aporu Nov 2021
Her eyes sparkled with unfathomable delight
And her smile gave off an ecstatic radiance of light
Her speech did not betray my expectation
And that vision in its fullness was my only anticipation
114 · May 2023
....won over by prose!
Emmanuel S Aporu May 2023
She read every line like a jurist,
As if her fate depended on it.
But he was sure her love was the purest,
And so, he filled his writings with wit.

He couldn't see her reaction,
He only imagined her smile.
And his words which expressed compassion,
Freed her from the feelings of guile.
Emmanuel S Aporu May 2021
When those planets bowed in humble submission
Freed we were, from that cosmic intimidation
Then left awed and in a singular confusion
That we both marveled at with unique discretion
For what adventure might a broken heart crave,
when only a flight to the furthest galaxies may save?
But nay - If that voyage brought unequalled healing
It was all because of him
For my fears his spirit did surmount
And provide joys no heart could ever count
When we flew beyond mars and those outer spaces
And beheld at length the beauty of forbidden places
We even touched those ancient deities
Out of reach now because of lost frequencies
Trust me the heavens opened their doors
We listened anew to the narration of those wars
Again, was the joy really because of him?
The beauty of those sights filled me up to the brim
But, though enraptured I was by that sweet dream
All the way, I was riding on his wing.
111 · May 2023
The fortunes of Nami!
Emmanuel S Aporu May 2023
Her heart beat at the sight of every word,
But her tears melted when she grasped their meaning,
Soothing sounds within her heart she heard,
For in her soul, bells of love were ringing.
111 · Aug 2023
pursued by grief!
Emmanuel S Aporu Aug 2023
Every road led him to another disaster
And all his hopes left him bitter thereafter
Every step brought him closer to the cliff
And what was love to him, but the start of his grief!
109 · Jul 2022
the lover's regret
Emmanuel S Aporu Jul 2022
It was better while we sought
Now the thing is not compelling anymore
Even our hearts are now sore,
For sadness, this gain has brought.

It was better while we fought
While the sound of our voices rose,
As we argued endlessly about our woes
But now, each one suffers (silently) with their lot.

It was better while we sobbed
Those tears revealed our compassion
But now, we have all become cold,
And treat each other with derision!
109 · Jul 2021
. . . . . of tears, no end!
Emmanuel S Aporu Jul 2021
The sun is brightly shinning
The day is peaceful and calm
But in his heart is an endless groaning
An internal battle – man against man
He cannot smile, he cannot see the light
For those men inside always fight.

Bright stars paint the skies
The moon glows in men’s favor
But this man by night cries
He’s lost everything – even his honor
But in the night he finds some solace
For the darkness hides his face

Other men look forward to new days
But this man is tormented by the sun's rays
His face is burrowed by those endless streams
Which never cease – not even in his dreams
He longs and sighs for the rain
To mask all those tears and pain

But the rain seldom comes, it never comes
yet the tormenting flame always burns
Will his wells run dry, will he ever cease to cry?
'What is lost,' he reflects 'is already lost!'
Why then must he fight with this ghost,
Will he live to forever suffer, or must he die?!
109 · Nov 7
Man, begone!
Let this breath be taken away
Let this heart cease its beating
Enough of the daily fray -
Enough of the soul's fitting!

The hope that is not given
A heart that's sorrow stricken
Many veneers in this life
Disaster, sadness and strife!

The happy bird sings
Lovely tunes in harmony
Every new day to this man brings -
Missed marks and concentric agony!
107 · Feb 2022
....the monster slain
Emmanuel S Aporu Feb 2022
Monsters must be slain by the head
So that the tormented can go free
But of this consideration I’m afraid,
“What if that monster is me?”
107 · Dec 2021
familiar demons
Emmanuel S Aporu Dec 2021
He sees them every day
And wonders what keeps them at bay
He knows someday they'll return
And that he must be ready to run!
107 · May 2023
The plight of Nami!
Emmanuel S Aporu May 2023
What's become of this life,
Why the endless strife,
At dawn you rise with hope,
At dusk, you just wanna drop.

Why the endless exertion,
What really are we chasing,
For even in our finest discretion,
It's clear the troubles we're facing.

But on with life - what's to do,
Your pains will someday flee from you..
And all those things you forever rue,
Will mutate into a brighter hue.
104 · May 2023
You and me!
Emmanuel S Aporu May 2023
None can understand my pain like you do
None can understand the things I deeply rue
I wish we'd love and forever stick like glue
For, "behold, you make all things new!"
104 · Aug 2021
Ripples of love
Emmanuel S Aporu Aug 2021
It dropped like a mass into the ocean
Giving off waves that danced in synchronous motion
It then spread out cancer-like to touch every water
Imbuing every particle with an eternal sparkle
It was uplifting - made the whole place brighter
It was her love; so deep and yet subtle
103 · Sep 2021
Close your eyes
Emmanuel S Aporu Sep 2021
If ever you are to fall
I will be tither to hold you
If  ever at dawn you call
I'll rise to you like the sunbathed dew
Close your eyes then, and imagine this
A life of love and unending bliss!!
The light in her eyes shines but so bright
And her smile is as great as is her might
Every word she speaks, moves the spirit within me
And her presence by me, gives colour to the world I see.
101 · Nov 2021
frightened by thought!
Emmanuel S Aporu Nov 2021
They both saw what they wanted
And their minds agreed to the sight
But by those thoughts, they were daily haunted
And weren’t sure to call it 'delight'
The fire was kindled, so was the hope
And the racing of their hearts could not stop
They were afraid of the outcome
The ‘if’, the ‘how’, the ‘what had to be undone’
They battled twixt themselves but to no avail
And in the end, a pure friendship was to prevail.
101 · Mar 10
The unwanted funeral
They carry his corpse to be buried
The ceremony has been technically hurried
On their lips and faces they seem to mourn
But deep in their hearts is scorn!
100 · Sep 5
heart severely broken!
The anguish of her soul has not yet found an external manifestation.
For every vapour in her eyes swears to forego its condensation.
The heaviness in her chest is more than the weight of many a lost love.
And her pain is like that of a heart cut into half.
Emmanuel S Aporu Sep 2023
Our fears have turned into our dreams,
And our actions do naught but enfeeble.
Our blood - thick and red - now flows in our streams,
And we are guilty of ******, for our own hopes we stifle.
94 · Dec 2020
Towards Immortality
Emmanuel S Aporu Dec 2020
. . . but am I mad or lost in a dream
Is ecstasy the feeling or does it only seem
Is this a thing that mortals do
Do they love and stick like glue
Is everyday but a symphony
Do we cry thinking of looming agony
Can we depart and yet stay,
forever in those hearts that love us as they say
Where together can we go
And of the end, how clearly can we know
Are we immersed in a passing frenzy
Or are we simply trying to be friendly
Let us thence vow ne'er to let go
And no more pains to mortal hearts bestow!
In honor of a friendship that I never had, and that left me wondering if another as this I will ever find!
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