Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
kromwellfarkus Jul 2022
If you dare take the time
To acknowledge me and mine
You'll find
I have the same woes as the average Joe
Bills and rent and fines and things
Dinner and dishes and kids without wings
Some estranged, some in my midst
Some in need of a white knuckle fist
Im enraged, and I twist
Til her blessedness kiss
Instils logic
And the white knuckle tints
She calms the erratic
The fiend within
Who wants nothing but chaos
Blasphemy and sin.

She calms it all.

This beautiful missing piece
Who is trying her hardest
To be a mother, a provider
A beautiful lover.
The truth I needed to hear
Spoken ever so delicately
She tells it as she sees it
And she sees it so perfectly.

While I distort
Destroy and maim
She deflects the ignorance
And soaks in the pain,
She is my rock, my solid
My reason why
Nothing will fail
With her by my side.
kromwellfarkus Mar 2022
Today I am not ok.

The demons within
Are getting their way,

They gouge and claw
Scratch and score
Embrace and adore
My beautiful pain,
I hear their screams
From beneathe paper skin
I turn up the music
In an attempt to muffle them.

I stop my day
To renounce their rein
With this wee poem
In hope it will slay,
Vent their angst
Through dancing word
It is my only defence
Against the hate they incur.

This anguish in time
Silences at last
Until next time they grow strength
And run rampant within.

Today, I'll be ok.
kromwellfarkus Jun 2022
Accepts my indifference
Wild emotional tantrums
Uncomfortable silence
Sheer laziness
My silly human traits.

Respects space
Loves my face
And tells me
Every beautiful day.

I choose no other
Forever.

Once she awakes
From her nightshift efforts
I will remind her
She is appreciated
With a kiss and a cuppa.

Through my blurred perspective
Tinted rose iris
I will smile through plastic teeth
In doe eyed admiration
At this beautiful person
That chose me
Over all others.

Every tomorrow
Every today
That I get to see her
Is a blessing.

Until I die
I will adore
Tend and care for
My sweet Lawla,

Forever more.
kromwellfarkus Aug 2019
Drifting
Barely existing
**** of melancholy
Double pump *******.

Scattered
Disillusioned
Must be
Tuesday.

Less dollars
Than sense
Hindsight
Past tense.

Crawling
In rat races
Left to scramble
Through rat feces.

Skun knees
Disfigured frame
Alone
With only one to blame.

Time expires
Days wasted
Become memories lost
Penniless cost.

Breathe and bleed
Barely exist
Drag knuckle and fist
Continue to drift.
kromwellfarkus Feb 2019
Actualized dependencies
Total recordable injury frequency rate
Moving forward...

Go **** yourself.

I am suddenly "in"
Against my will
Amongst corporate drones
Forever on their phones.

Their sentences are cryptic
Their question are trivial
I sit there, complexed
Listening to their drivel.

Acronyms flow freely
From their forked tongues
I ask a menial question
Only to be scoffed upon.

As my brow furrows
And my chest tightens
I clench my fists
Withholding under the desk.

This is a boys club
Of overly cologned men
Clean cut with ***** paws
Suit and tie, the works.

It is my turn to speak
I stand and I ask
Were you lads always like this?
Who started this stupid stance?

I explain realistically
This is what affects our reality
These tasks and these problems
Are you lads even listening?

Once the silence gets too much
I take my seat
Every man in this room
Loses their job within a week.

They are given the flick
And I am given a raise
In high-vis, I carry on
Given obligatory praise.

I decline the raise
I spread it across my crew
As they are the gentleman
Deserving the recognition.

I return to my office
Answering emails and calls
Just another day
At big fat stupid work.
The end game is on its way
Routine chores are here to stay
Every day is every other day
Work and bills, too old to play.

Every penny has its purpose
Discussions deep on every purchase
No need for surplus
Within the adult circus.

Grey hairs coloured brown
Every ache now makes a sound
Playlists come back around
Swim to retirement or drown.

Birthdays, Christmas every second week
Facebook posts so we don't have to speak
Floorboards and bones have the same creak
Eat, ****, drink, work, **** and sleep.

Soon enough, we can retire and die
Tears will well and children will cry
Photos kept will fade as time goes by
Front bar of the afterlife, drop in and say Hi.
kromwellfarkus Dec 2021
Circling winds
Stand within
Remnants of adoration
Unsure footing.

Movement where there was once none
It all twists and becomes
A life once wished upon
Unfortunate for some.

Blending worlds
Through ebb and flow
It is what it is
What will be will be, you'll see.

Luxury of love
The silk and the scent and the humble
The angst and the crush and the crumble
Privileged to be involved.

Blessed with morning kiss
Caring head on chest
Someone to assist with mess
A friend to miss.

It will all make sense
After the storm
For now, just stand within
Circling winds.
Stress is about worrying what might happen. Just roll with it.
kromwellfarkus Feb 2023
I will never have to ask,
I will never have to question,
I will never have to doubt,
Our love.

When my eyelids drop,
She has her hand in mine,
When I awake, twisted quilts,
She is closer to my side.

Call when I've finished work,
Call when she's finished work,
Just to ask,
Do need anything...?

Half way through conversation
I say I love her,
She tilts her head and smiles
Doe eyed, in her embrace.

Morning tea then coffee
Feet up, sharing memes
And that smile...
Gets me every time.

My inner strength
My secret weapon
My best friend
My beautiful wife.

Thank ****
We found
Eachother.
Thank ****.
kromwellfarkus Jun 2020
I want it all
Yet nothing at all
I want to reach the highest peak
And fall
All at once
Yet not even a taste
I want to be left alone
In your warm embrace.

If you let me
I will show you
Who we can be
Together
I will show you love
And give you my all
If you catch me
After this fall.

These buckled knees
These broken dreams
This rusted cage
Around my heart
This tiny frame
This twisted brain
Unbeknownst to me
Was yours from the start.

I never knew
How I was able to feel
Until I felt something
For you
I cannot wait
Nor resist
To lose myself
In your touch and your kiss.
kromwellfarkus Dec 2018
Its been a few months now
I've been home
She asked if we could make it work
I ensured her, we could.

At the beginning
It was all love
All ***, all muscle
All flex.

Routine arrives
Raises its brow
Settles, as dust
Covered in rust.

Familiar nuance
Dishes and dinner
Laughter and mayhem
Lego fidget spinner.

I go to work
They go to school
She folds my clothes
I'm unsure of where they go.

This ghost tints
No longer invisible
Our photos sit proudly
Upon window sill.

We have grown through distance
Strengthened from afar
I have what I've always had
I just never knew what it was.

It's family
It's love
It is all
The above.
kromwellfarkus Jun 2022
Torn apart from my kin
Through my own decisions
They'll be fine, I tell myself
But they are not, they are broken

The love of my children
Has been put aside
For the love of a woman
I don't deserve this life

They hate me
And I dont blame them
I am my father's son
And they are theirs
kromwellfarkus Feb 2019
Sit in the fire and smile
Tell a joke
Make them laugh
All the while, burning.

A wink and a nod
Just to advise
The blood still flows
In veins amongst bones.

Collect routine days
As feeble forgotten memories.

It all builds
I feel it, building
Deep within
Rice paper skin.

I may errupt
I may contain
For now, sit in the fire
And smile.
kromwellfarkus Oct 2021
It's gonna be ok.

We'll get through this ****
This is not a sink or swim
This is a win win

One day, you'll look back
And wonder
Why you worried at all

We will fix
Everything

With love.
kromwellfarkus Dec 2018
Once flesh, now bone
Once bone, now tooth
Once innocent
Now fuckn uncouth.

Light behind closed eyes
Ignite iris and char sight
Rose coloured glasses
Misplaced.

They love me
They leave a light on for me
But, I still utilise
The light behind closed eyes.

Now I'm home
I'll hold you
With your arms
By your side.

Sigh.

Sickly circles
And a rash
That won't seem to go
Once flesh, now bone.
For
kromwellfarkus May 2020
For
Forever in love
With the dream
Of forevermore
In love

In you I see
A place to sleep
Safe and secure
Safe and assured

I speak heart truths
To you
And you
You know

It's just for you.

My collection of masks
All set aside
With you
By my side

Finally
This poor old soul
Can stop searching

Forevermore.
kromwellfarkus Sep 2019
Cold fish
Three kids
Pull away
From my kiss.

We can't go back
To how it used to be.

Bitter
Twisted
If she loved me
I missed it.

Expectation
To change
But I
Have always been this way.

Messages
From other girls
They say they have
What I've been looking for.

But this
Cold fish
Three kids
Is all I've ever known.

I have 3 drinks
Before home
Just to drown out
The noise.

I pull over
Side of the street
Just to focus
On my love for her.

When I get home
She's there
Ready to miss
My kiss.

We have crazy history
I think I made her this way
She has changed and I
Have stayed the same.

I can't leave her
Cos, I'll leave kids 3
And they won't
Ever forgive me.

So the question lies...

Do I stay unhappy
For their happiness?
Or, do I leave
For my happiness?

As a man, the rules are
I get to see kids 3
On the weekends
And sometimes in between.

Cos, if I walk
I walk alone
As my happiness
Is second to theirs.

Or, I wait
Loveless for 8 more years
Desperately try to repair
Bandaid on a severed wound.

I sometimes wish
I could give my kiss
To another
For always and ever.

But then, as a man,
I would not stand
For her to do
The same.

From my kiss
Pull away
Three kids
Cold fish.
Another dart to edge the thoughts
To feed the idle hands
Another sup to ******* the angst
Of a bitter and twisted old man.
The toxins ebb and flow
And slow
The time which fury paces
It is only he who tastes it.
Cracking slap of now and then
Needle into flesh of sudden memory
Shake the sepia to ashes
Back in the fickle stem.
Bellows of old echo
It is only he who hears it
Abyss breath allows the forget
Age allows to control it.
Choose between venom green
Or amber coals of liquid
Nicotine dreams manifests the scene
The constant, past and forgotten.

It will all makes sense when nothing else does.
kromwellfarkus Feb 2019
This brittle heart I was given
Covered in glue and silicon
Bandages and sticky tape
Barely beats nowadays.

So easily hurt, damaged and bruised
So easily deceived, ***** and used
My outer is strong, focused and clean
Yet, my inner is lost in a weak mans dream.

You ask for help, I give it
You ask for monetary unit
You demand my love, but give back only angst
And I fall in a heap, despite all my strength.

I close my eyes, amidst conversation
And you see this as a misunderstanding
I am just gathering my wits, can't you see?
It's hard to think, with a head full of sea.

I try to get my point across
But you rant and rave and get cross
I swallow my pride and words
Just to appease your requirements.

So, here I am, on my own, with you all
Loving my life, yet hating it all
You don't care if I fall
As long as I pay every toll.

Well, *******, and your fickle ways
I have one last breath, just for you
As I flip the bird and walk out the door
You will see, only then, what you've lost.

This brittle heart is all I have
It still beats, it still does its thing
When I recieve your apology text
I'll try my best, not to reply.
kromwellfarkus Feb 2023
I was once like you
Wild and untamed
Music, drugs, no plan.

Concerts, mosh pits
Ripped jeans
Bad hair
Thinking I was the ****.

Living from week to week
Live like a king on payday
Almost homeless 6 days later
Microwaved meal diet.

**** school
Just a social gathering
Girlfriends and gossip
Popularity and talking ****.

**** and acid
Alcohol and cigarettes
Music, love and ***
Lets get ****** up.

Then, the hangovers hung on
And the drugs made me ill
I'd lose my edge, my intensity
I was aging... ******.

Get a job, get a haircut, comply
Every day, just get up and go
Save the money, buy a house
Wise investments.

Get married, have kids
Go to work, every ******* day
Just to support these kids
I helped to make.

So, these kids I made
Bad hair, attitude
All they want is music and drugs
Little devious homeless thugs.

It didn't matter
The wrong they did
I was just like them once
A thoughtless little kid.

So, it has all gone full circle
I am an old bloke now
And these kids, not giving a ****
Come to me when they need me.

It's not all bad
I see my kids happy sometimes
And I see who I used to be
With my kids, who were just like me.

God speed.
kromwellfarkus Dec 2019
This isn't a real job
The lines are crossed and confused
Scope of works sometimes so vague
It shortens my poor bosses fuse.

When the job's on, the job's fukn on
We sweat bullets, amongst all the banter
Beers at the yard, lines off of tynes
And doobies to trigger the laughter.

We travel to places, serene and surreal
But also, vile, uninhabitable and ****
Our cars get a flogging, as do our livers
I don't really know, I just rocked up here.

We have seen many leave and given the flick
Jobs so *******, we didn't give a ****
Just do as we're told, take the money and fold
That's what I like about you, **** all.

Rub shoulders with corporate
Just play the fukn game
Remember old mate? What's his fukn name?
Yeah, he got fired, carry on old mate.

So we, the remaining few, represent the crew
Getting kicked out of a pub, maybe two
Sky fireworks, twerking locals and trannies
Mugs away, closest to bulls, play for serves.

As we encounter and share more scenarios
Breathe the ******* out and the good times in
Seeya on Mondee ya pregnant bitumen ****
If not, I'll see ya in the bottom of the bin.
A few in house jokes here for my fellow workers, I wrote this to recite at our up and coming Christmas show... it's not what you do, but who you work with that makes a job worthwhile.
kromwellfarkus Mar 2022
She altered her entire reality
Picked up all her ****
And moved to the desert
For me.

She rolled the dice
On a verbal promise
That I would love her
Until we're dead.

My word
Is oak.

I left my world behind
My kids, my home, my abode
I rolled the dice
On her word.

I gamble my entire life
My heart and soul
That you are the one
I've been searching for.

Safe bet.

Roll the dice
On love.
I wish you all the best in your endeavours.

May it all fall in your lap
With minimal effort,
And desired results.

May you sleep sound with a clear conscience.

Undisturbed, at peace with your past.
May your trauma be slight and easily managed, making your life exciting and full of love.

I wish you this, as I battle against icy winds, adorned in old blankets, weeks unwashed.
Addictions unbreakable as the ignorance is bliss, social interactions often threatening and violent, lips blistered and skin weathered, all my belonging together in a shopping cart I stole last week. A hot meal is just a dream, but when achieved, is enjoyed in the shadows of the city, often eaten with my buckled, white knuckle hands. I don't ask for money anymore, as the colour has drained from my eyes and hair, and the strangers don't care, they are always in a rush somewhere, with everything but nothing to spare. When I die, noone will be notified, noone will cry, I will be simply a gross memory for a medic, having to drag my corpse from wherever I am, reeking of misery, loneliness and feces.

I wish you all the best.
kromwellfarkus Mar 2019
Do you want to be happy?

Or

Do you want to be right?

This is what he asked me,
On hole number nine.

Well, I said (with a head full of lead),
I want both of these things,
I have an opinion
And it's worth contemplation.

As he took his stance,
And positioned to hit,
On the back swing, he said,
Your opinion aint worth ****.

We argued back and forth,
Until the eighteenth,
Until he turned and said
So, you want to be right?

Silence as we packed our clubs,
Separate cars, straight to the pub,
I told him, fine have it your way,
He nodded and said,

See?

It's easier being happy.
kromwellfarkus Sep 2021
Curl into an anxious ball
Wrapped in cloth strewn
On the mattress dragged
To a silent tomb

Numb the phone
Lay and stare at the flickering pixels
Change position once bones creak
Awake still asleep

Salty deluge with no emotion
Perhaps just fatigue and disinterest
No time is now
There is only existence

No sustenance required
As no effort is made
But the mice in my mind
Swarm upon one another

The calm is electric
Letting reality die
Close my eyes one more time
To feel the embrace of my emptiness

Nothing is spoken
But the whispers to myself
Everything that I own
Stays where it is shelved

A crisis of nothing
A catastrophe of bliss
Coiled in angst and self pity
Goodnight my sweet prince
kromwellfarkus Oct 2022
Home...

Where is home?
With the people you love?
And the couch that you know?
And the things that you own?

No.

Home is within,
Beneath your stretched skin,
The calmness you feel,
When you are alone,

This is home.

Where you can relax,
Amongst all the chaos,
Home is where you,
Can be you.

Removal of ones mask,
It is where you can bask,
In you individual oddness,
This is home.

Have a good day,
I'll see you at home,
I will start dinner,
See you there.

**
Our struggles make us who we are
The blatent cracks in our armour,
The pain we breathe on our own
Must be exhaled with eachother.

Accepting flaws is human
No one owns perfection,
Take a breath, take some time
And come back when you're ready.

It's ok to be wrong
It's ok to feel out of sorts,
Control your reactions
Control your thoughts.

The answers are there
If you choose to seek,
Share your pain with those you love
Cry, eat and sleep.
kromwellfarkus Jul 2019
She doesn't say
How was her day
Anymore.

She sometimes says
What I need to change
My behavior or my attitude
Is usually the way.

She never says
She's strong, she's brave
And, I want her to be.

Perhaps, not today.


I try.

I fukn try.

But, our eyes don't meet
Eye to eye.


I think of her
Throughout the day,
I doubt
She does the same.

At times she fills me
Full of love,
At times she kills me
And all of the above.

So...

Tea is ready,

And, I should go...

I wonder, if she'll say
How her day was.

Fingers crossed
That she says so.
19 years together.
Still love her.
kromwellfarkus Jun 2019
Happiness is a lie,

The pursuit is in vain
As the world has been constructed
To give nothing but pain.

Your friends will depart
They will move away
And all you will have left
Is your disinterested family.

Everyone will be too busy
To come to your wedding
To come to your birthday
To come to your funeral.

You will finish school
Work until you're insane
Retire and wonder
What the **** happened.

You will despise your partner
Never get laid
Even a simple conversation
Will be like pulling teeth.

The money you make
Will never be enough
One day, you'll awake in your bed
With nothing.

There is no point.

Your spark will fade
Your drive will dissolve
And your stupid life story
Will never be told.

Maybe it's just me
Maybe I'm just being negative
Or maybe, just maybe
I'm ******* right.

Good luck.

You'll need it.
kromwellfarkus Jul 2020
The storm is calming finally
To a calm exhale breeze
There was times
I had dust
In my eyes
But now
The well is full (both of them)
And, I am
Content and safe.

Lightening, horizon bound
As I've found
This twisted reflection
Smiles back.

The pain is always temporary
You too, will look back
And smile your beautiful smile
The beautiful inside smile you always hide.

As a human, hunting happiness
And finding it,
It is my duty
To hope you find yours.

I believe in you
Good luck.
you are allowed happiness, and have every right to persue it by any means. Stay organised, focused and true to yourself, push for it, it exists.
She's quiet tonight
After our conversation
I had an opinion
Then she went quiet.
Her responses are weak
Her mannerisms timid
I can feel my anger building
But I internalise the demon.
I do not sleep well
Nor does she
I can hear her breathing
I know when she's asleep.
She wakes me unintentionally
I feel I barely slept
She apologises and leaves for work
While I listen to every footstep.
I cannot concentrate at work
Basic responses to trivial questions
I do just enough
To defer any suspicion.
I want her to say I'm wrong
That she doesn't agree
But she internalised her demon
Just like me.
kromwellfarkus Dec 2020
The poems I wrote
You didn't read.

I was trying
To communicate.

The threats you dished out
The compliance you required
The more you wanted
Just bottled me up.

Now, you are someone else
Someone I wouldn't bother with
A memory that pains me
A topic I try to avoid.

I tried
Pieces within have died
I have no choice but to use my voice
To try and regain some pride.

I have built myself up
I have a beautiful friend by my side
I have recreated myself in such a way
The old me wouldn't recognise.

This is the last one I write
The last one you won't read.

It doesn't matter what you think
Or how you feel
I have cut ties...

Tell the kids, Dad says Hi.
Hanging by a tendon.
Feelings have teeth,
Isolate the soul,
To feel... something.
No reasoning,
Irate simply because.
Prickles behind shallow eyes...
Something is wrong.

Just need a minute
To exhale.

May have been here before,
The same feelings of angst,
Familiar internal screams,
Writhing and twisted within.
Tense, blank, and fickle,
Lost in a world under skin,
Greying out the love,
To feel... something.

Just need a minute
To exhale.

Alien home,
Out of place,
Skin doesn't fit,
Like once hoped.
Unsure how to continue,
The mask is back on,
Deep breaths,
Just get some sleep.

Just need a minute
To dream.
kromwellfarkus Aug 2019
Conversation like old crust on bread
Affection missing the point
Intimacy long gone
Don't touch me during this song.
Sleep back to back
No more goodnight or sweet dreams
Maybe kick a thigh
During REM or when alarms ring.
Get told I'm doin it all wrong
Get told I have to change
Get told I have to change my ways
No wonder this stray cat strays.

She cant accept the fact
That I am the way that I am
Read my poety to my kids
The way that they understand,
It's cold and the wind still blows
Through my hoody and ugg boots
I shiver as I enjoy my own company
These are the shoes that I choose.

Slight one-liners, tongue in cheek
Don't care, been like this for over 4 weeks
Water off a ducks back
Silly ****, go **** yourself.

I probably shouldn't swear
But here we are
Tonic to my lips
Terrible hat hair,
I tell her how my day was
All the pros and cons
She tells me that her day was "fine"
I raise an eyebrow and don't give a ****.

My poor young kids...

Living with a rancid Mum n Dad.

Poor little **** trophies,
They didn't sign up for this ****.

I'm just trying
And so is she
But, we are two different versions
Of how life should be.

She doesn't read
My poetry.

If she did...

Perhaps we wouldn't be.
kromwellfarkus Nov 2021
See you in the kitchen
For slow dances
For dishes
My turn to dry
You choose the song
Don't forget I love you
And if even the song is crap
I'll still think you're ok.

We have bills
Beyond our means
You're beautiful
And I love you more in those jeans
Hold hands as we walk and skip
Stop, just for a wee kiss
I wished for this
And there she is.

Early awake to sleepy kisses
To super gross morning breath
I don't wanna fukn go
But off I go
Have a good day
Seeya after
For slow dances
In the kitchen.
kromwellfarkus Jun 2019
Another working day done
Say goodbye to the sun
On the drive home
Stop in at the pub.

Couple amber starters
Sixer for the road
Farewell to the bar flies
Boisterous hoo roo.

I turn the wrong way
And continue on
As I am well aware
Of what awaits me at home.

She will be angry
And the kids will be crazy
I will seem distant
Outside, on my own.

I choke down my roadies
If only for dutch courage
Puff out my chest
And exhale the inevitable.

She is wild eyed
She questions my methods
I stand still, nodding in agreeance
While her arms flail in accusation.

The kids, walk on egg shells
To come give me a squeeze
They bury their heads into my puffed out chest
I kiss their confused brows.

I help with dinner
I help with dishes
I have nothing to say
To the missus.

As much as I love her
As much as I care
When ever I'm home
I'm never actually there.

She rips into me
Just before bed
So, I sleep on the couch
To avoid the discomfort.

I awake before my alarm
Quietly, organise my ****
Walk out the door and sigh
It may be a long day at work today.
kromwellfarkus Apr 2020
From everyday, endless and boundless,
To nothing.

I chose this.

It kills me,
To be unable to love
Her.

I wait, for a sign
But, she has so much respect
And so do I.

I want to reconnect
But the flame will reignite
And we will get burnt.

Maybe, it's not our time
Maybe, our time is to come
Maybe we missed our chance.

Maybe, it was my big fat stupid fault.

Trapped by my own decisions
To do the "right" thing
I will break every heart I love
If I manifest this.

I am unsure
What hurts more
The fact I can't love her
Or the silence.

I chose this.
Let
kromwellfarkus Dec 2018
Let
Before I allowed
The world to break me,
I was stronger, keen and able

Now, incoherent and disabled.

The dream was just a fable,
Just put food on the table,
Alone, reminisce and ramble...

To the breeze, I mumble.

Another ale to soothe the blues,
Another cone to poke the bruise,
Another cigarette to calm the nerves,
Another circle to dance within.

Now, incoherent and disabled,
I was stronger, keen and able,

Before I allowed,
The world to break me.
kromwellfarkus Aug 2022
Our little dream
Is ours alone
From a long distance relationship
To making a home
If it wasn't for the chaos
If it wasn't for the strain
This beautiful life
Would be but a dream.

She takes the time
To show her love
As tired as she is
She still manages a smile
I am fickle at best
She dotes at my being
But I am far from the man
I wish to be.

I pour my heart on her
To give her the strength
With my long nailed demons
Scratching within my head
I calm them with toxins
I sedate them with love
I comatose them with dreams
And all the above.

Where will this end?
With enemy or friend?
Only time will tell
Whether this dream is ours
Or it belongs to them.
kromwellfarkus Jul 2020
She talks a lot
And sometimes, not at all
She is always tired
But finds it hard to sleep
She has the weight of the world
On her little shoulders
And scars from decisions
She made in her youth.

She has a torrid past
Vague and complicated
Scared of going out alone
Because the world is a scary place
She has been used
She has been abused
Broken, distorted
And treated as a fool.

This dark haired fragile angel
Is my world
Her strength gives me strength
And I give her mine
We have allowed eachother
To finally exhale
After so many years
Of holding our breath.

She is not perfect
But, to me, she is
She makes me feel again
Like art should.
kromwellfarkus Dec 2022
This time of year
Close to Christmas
Thoughts of family
Flood the lonely mind,
The twisted complexities
Which attaches us
To one another...
We are bound.

Whether you like it or not
We are bound.

*** holes.
kromwellfarkus Mar 2023
She cried into my chest this morn
Buried her head as deep as she could go
Kissing her brow
I told her, I know, I know.

Her fatigue is my anger
Her kindness is my militant manner
I dare not oppose her
In fear of breaking her brittle heart.

She is stretched thin
Only frays of twine remain
My opinion is wicked and muddled
Stay calm boy, stay calm.

We have a complicated life
Me and my beautiful wife
This nest we chose together
To curl into eachother.

As she drove away this morn
Tears, still, on her cheek
I waved goodbye and blew her a kiss
It will chase her until I see her again.
kromwellfarkus Feb 2020
Nudgin 40
3 squids
Got a ticket
To a gig

Pre organised
To meet 2 mates
They didn't show
So, I'm on me own

It took me a while
To realise
That they wouldn't show

The ticket was a Christmas gift.

I lost my hat.

It was a leather cap with fluffy ear *****..

It was.

I lost one of two joints;
But, smoked my second one
With fellow revellers
I cannot recall their faces.

I crowd-surfed.

I was literally upside down
3 times.

This is how I lost my hat.

I bought it at a servo a few years ago.

Now
I'm home.

Proper fuckn rinsed.

Recalling my evening.

Nudgin 40.

3 squids.

Out of 2 I'd give it 1.
kromwellfarkus Feb 2023
Fickle little feelings
Celebrate the decline
Of this roller-coaster
Called life.
Muster the motivation
To sew these open wounds
Rather than sprinkle band-aids
On limbs lost from decisions made.
This simple man
Lost in the light of his phone
Back to back cigarettes
Feet up, in his quiet spot.

This is what he prefers.

The silence is his company
Loneliness, his strength
Masked in jokes and one-liners
Painted as per scenario.
Lost all time
To evolve passions
Only addictions
Get the time of day.

Puff puff pass.

They all want his focus
Leech off of reputation
Which is tinted at best
**** in his nest.
If only he could focus
If only for a while
He could celebrate his victories
And share his smile.

Vent or implode.

His muse beside him always
Even in restless sleep
To share and adore and dote
On passions and poisons.
She will push his eclectic
She will drive his esoteric
Of the roller-coaster
Called life.
kromwellfarkus Sep 2023
Love is no longer an issue.

Now, others things must take precedence.

This is the go...

I left a destructive relationship,
I started again, and I chose wisely,
But, my children, left to go wild
Somehow, still love me.

Now, I reside in a household of 9
A broken family, we are the ties
We cook and clean and tend to them
We expect money for bills and rent.
Common areas are tidied
The dog is fed
We got them all jobs
To expose them to the cruelty of life.
Kids from 25 to 14
We have set them on a path
And we are there, to guide and confide
As long as they use their manners.

But, I left 3 behind...
It burns my heart and soul
As they are left to their own devices
Without me to shield from the cold.
So, with my love, we have a plan
To build a home for all
For freedom and growth and mistakes
To learn from and evolve.

It pains me, but, this is life
It is cold, and mean and unforgiving
Time will tell if these wounds heal
And this, is the point of living.
kromwellfarkus Aug 2019
This demon is fuelled
Brimming with ability
Poised and capable
Of ******* everything and anything.

Always tensing
Just during conversation
Eyeballing, fist clenching
Unsure, correct, politely swearing.

This demon is pent up.



This man, in the backyard
He just sits, and smokes, and drinks
Tapping away at his phone
He comes inside to **** and eat.
He says hello, he says goodnight
He screams at us when we've not done right
He sleeps on the lounge
He is a ghost.



This demon I contain
Its talons obscure responsibility
And I sit, and I smoke and I drink
Outside, on my phone.
Useless, piece of fuckn ****
Just, be a part of it
Your family is right there
On the other side of that glass.

This demon has strength
Of which I cannot break
Its chains are worn and not rated
Its strength gathered has gone unchecked.

Until... I just talk
To her, and to them
Be the father they need
And the man she needs me to be.
Consistency matters
Everyday is a new opportunity
To be stronger
Than the demon within.
kromwellfarkus Jul 2019
No blade will cut
No noose will tighten
No pistol will trigger.

The ongoing misery
Swallowed
Bones and offal
Let the eyes well.

Some words spoken
Cannot be unsaid
Let them fester
Within the walls of my head.

Unable to fly
Unable to ignore
Last red before bed
Awake on crumbed floor.

Open wounds
Stay open
Just to remind me
Of the pain consumed.

I will be
The last man alive
After they've all died
This is my curse.

Stay alive
With all the dead
My funeral
Will have to be self funded.

Fail at suicide
Fail at living
This depression has teeth
And will not submit.

Deep breath
Get out of the ute
Smile to the work crew
Make them laugh.
kromwellfarkus Mar 2020
Me lad.
He's 14.
And, hes been in ****
At school.

Now, we have his back
And all that.
He's my boy
Me lad.

It has come to light
At such recent time
That his forgery skills
Have been paying his bills
To freedom.

"Uncle Matt"
Has a note for you teacher.

You must do
What Uncle Matt wrote.

As per Uncle Matts last note,
Here is another,
Signed...

Uncle Matt.

The signature said
Uncle (fukn) Matt.

They accepted this
And off he went
To where ever he desired...

Good ol Uncle Matt.

Me lad,
He's 14.
And he's playing the fools
For the fools they are.

We had a meeting.

Me, the missus and me lad,
It didn't turn out too bad
But, then it did
And we had to take a step back.

Me ol mate.
Me lad.
He's got demons in his head,
That I can't slay...

Cos he's in his room most of the time,
Figuring out his identity.

So, from outside looking in,
I just let him breathe...

Cos he's me lad
An I'm his Dad.
kromwellfarkus Jan 2019
The anticipation
Before her kiss
Is a lump in my throat
Of a half swallowed fist.

She can can be so mean
She can be so sweet
I feel like I'm winning
I feel like I forfeit.

I try so hard
To appease her needs
But I am just a mere male
Dealing with my own ****.

I am so selfish
I am so needy
All I want
Is for her to want me.

I take her on adventures
I buy her awesome things
I make her laugh, I make her ******
I love her more than I care to imagine.

I do her dishes
I cook her meals
I read her poetry
I pay her bills.

I work so hard
At work and at home
I give my time to my children
So she has time on her own.

She gives me angst
She breaks my heart
But, I am a man
So, I must keep it to myself.

I choose her
I choose this
I choose the anticipation
Before her kiss.
kromwellfarkus May 2019
I was prepared
To follow you
To the ends of the earth
But, you said no.

I fell in love
But didn't bother
To tell you.

I was prepared
To leave my life behind
But, it was too much too soon
For you.

You were honest
And, the truth hurt
So, I accepted the fact
I'd never be with you.

I ran circles
Chased my tail
Just to end up
Where I started.

I remember
Everything my memory allows
And I will always
Feel the same.

I am not worth
Your company
I am well aware
That you are a pipe dream.

So, now what to do?
Stuck between suicide and lifes struggle
Don't want to live
Yet, too young to die.

Unable to begin again
Unsure of how to express how I feel
Don't want to scare you away
Unable to decipher anything.

Silly boy
When will you learn
Every bridge you build
Does not need to be burned.

Childish man
When will you understand
Love is not a lifestyle
It is a commitment.

Foolish male
How will this end
Your soul mate is a myth
Not found within a kiss.

Stupid bloke
Swallow the smoke
She's waiting for you
At home.

She loves you
She always has
So do your children
You're insulting all of them.

Go home
Kiss all brows
Cook dinner
And love what you have.

Some day soon
You will wake up old
Listen to this angel of logic
And do what you've been told.

I love you.
kromwellfarkus Nov 2020
She's younger than me maybe
She likes me, no conditions apply
I fall deep and stay deep
When I see her smile from her eyes.
Shes been through the ringer
A life many would've given up
But she pushed through, maybe for her kids
Maybe for the hope of true love.
I've made promises I intend to keep
A life we've chosen to live
I will love and adore, cherish and more
Than I ever will or have done before.
There are complications to endure
Issues to sift and sort
Movements to make, risks to take
And furniture to be bought.

Fuckn bring it.

I have made an ode to be the man
She has needed, never to forget
To share a life one hundred percent
And bring home the milk and bread.
Next page