This broken crayon
Still draws.

Succeeding with flaws.

Terrible foibles
Kept under wraps
Moderation of over indulgence.

Fickle human
Tricking you all
With niceties
And courtesy.

Under skin
Screaming within
On the exterior
Work place superior.

You have to guess
As I won't tell
And if you guess correctly
I'll change the subject.

Just another
Just like you
Dealing with life
Learning to shuffle.

Dad
What are you doing?
Left the misso
But you have 3 kids.

What up?

New life
New misso
Social media
N ****.

What the **** ****?

We see you for a few hours
Every fortnight
During your days off
And it's all a bit ******.

So, you're getting married?
And where are we?
Still living in the ashes
You left us in.

Dad
What are you doing?

Her alarm goes off first
She ninjas her way out the door
She kisses my brow every morning
To keep our sweetness secured.
She snaps and texts throughout the day
And I do the same
Finish our sentences with kisses
To assure one another we're ok.
She's usually home before me
We talk of our ******* day
Prep dinner, feed the crew
Share kitchen kisses along the way.
Say our goodnights to the kidlets
Curl up with our favourite show
We make love and it's always magical
She is beautiful and I let her know.
The days are much like the last
Work and bills and dinner and things
I would not have this any other way
Without my Queen, I can't be King.

Awake at 0415
Sleep still in my eyes
Bundle up crib
**** and a ****
Shave clean
Coffee on the boil
Then, on the road.
Lit ciggy
Volume still up from last night
Knock it down a notch
Until the ears can focus...

Swipe on, turnstile spins
Follow in suit
Say g'day to nightshift
As the hi-vis is donned
PPE all strapped on
Steel capped **** kickers
Helmet slap, follow the crowd
To prestart.

Sit and nod, coffee lukewarm
Handover from nights
Sign on lads and ladies
Lock on, work instruction, THA
We are all dressed the same
The same team
With the same goal
To go home...

We don't know how it all works
In our silo, doing our bit
For our 12 hour stint
For 7 days.

Just before 6
With our bodies worn and ready
For a quiet bevvy
With mates we made at work
Swipe off, turnstile spins
Say g'day to nightshift
It'll be our turn next swing
Top job, had a win.

Microwave feed
Boots at the door
TV just for the noise
Stare at the phone
They ring before bed
Let it ring out
How was your day?
Same as every other, don't bother.

Asleep before head hits pilla
Awake at 0415

No one understands
This boy, becoming a man
His needs go above anyone else's
An air of selfishness.

He cannot stay home
The rage is fuelled
So, he runs
In circles from couch to couch.

With pent up anger
And misunderstanding
He claws wildly at the world
Missing his mark.

Forcing his opinion
On those that cower
He is an unstoppable juggernaut
Unleashing his power.

As the dust settles, he sees himself
Alone, on a couch, as a child
No bedroom, no family
No place for this boy gone wild.

I entice change and he accepts
Here is a job, here is your space
Here is my love, and my shoulder to sob
Whatever you do, don't quit your job.

I see the smile I thought long gone
And the spark return in his eyes
The rage within has settled for now
And I will be there, for when it returns.

Down.

Lines of communication blur
I can't be sure
Of my ****** expression
Or body language
My silence says it all
The disinterest
The cold response
The fatigue.

With tender touch
She prys at my shell
Searching for cracks
Or a subtle tell
Tender within
I convulse and sin
I let no love out
I let no love in.

The pain is all I want
This twisted front
It's all I've known
It has help me grow,
Perhaps not
I don't know what
It is to be loved
By another so pure.

She won't let me die
Without a fight
And the tears from her heart
Fall upon mine
My poor brittle ego
Exhales all this angst
And I fall hopelessly
In her embrace.

Our little dream
Is ours alone
From a long distance relationship
To making a home
If it wasn't for the chaos
If it wasn't for the strain
This beautiful life
Would be but a dream.

She takes the time
To show her love
As tired as she is
She still manages a smile
I am fickle at best
She dotes at my being
But I am far from the man
I wish to be.

I pour my heart on her
To give her the strength
With my long nailed demons
Scratching within my head
I calm them with toxins
I sedate them with love
I comatose them with dreams
And all the above.

Where will this end?
With enemy or friend?
Only time will tell
Whether this dream is ours
Or it belongs to them.