Collect memories
Only to forget
Soon after

Burn myself
Just to feel
Something

Endure love
Inhale loss
From afar

Eyes ajar.

Run circles
In a straight line
Fall and climb

Cry on the inside
Outside sigh
Hurry up and die

Nothing in life
Has gone to plan
Thus far

Eyes ajar.

Lick wounds
Gaping and infested
Failures tested

This old boy
Once a young lad
Bitter and sad

Broken from experience
Whoever you were
Whoever you are

Eyes a jar.

This smile that I fake
Every day...

The mask slips aside
I cannot hide
The silly angst
Behind.

I want the best
For everyone
But let myself die
With thumbs up.

This life
Is not mine
This home
Is alone.

Hopelessly in love
Destroying all of the above.

Dinner's ready honey
Thanks babydoll.

She altered her entire reality
Picked up all her ****
And moved to the desert
For me.

She rolled the dice
On a verbal promise
That I would love her
Until we're dead.

My word
Is oak.

I left my world behind
My kids, my home, my abode
I rolled the dice
On her word.

I gamble my entire life
My heart and soul
That you are the one
I've been searching for.

Safe bet.

Roll the dice
On love.

Now
Is so different
So oblique
So new... still, after all this time .

Just realised
That I
Just realised.

Rich poor man
Still can...

Week to week
There is no weakness

Which bruises easily,
Has chalky bones

Calm chaos,
Welcome to
Door mat and exit light
Confuse, engulf, exhale.

If you lived in my mind
You'd be home by now.

Calm on the outside
Trembling within
Strength of a man
Heart of a child

Why didn't they teach me
About life in school
Why didn't they advise
It could be so cruel

Just grow up and realise
You're on your own
Fumbling with emotion
Swim or drown

They all seem in control
Like they have it all
While I smile and struggle
With no idea what to do

Life, may just be
Pay bills and die.

Today I am not ok.

The demons within
Are getting their way,

They gouge and claw
Scratch and score
Embrace and adore
My beautiful pain,
I hear their screams
From beneathe paper skin
I turn up the music
In an attempt to muffle them.

I stop my day
To renounce their rein
With this wee poem
In hope it will slay,
Vent their angst
Through dancing word
It is my only defence
Against the hate they incur.

This anguish in time
Silences at last
Until next time they grow strength
And run rampant within.

Today, I'll be ok.

Silent strength
Behind a smile
Struggling heart
Give it a while.

Half a heart
Around her neck
The other half
Around mine.

She will always
Be beautiful
In my dusty eyes.

Calm, hard to find
In a productive mind
She only stops
For my embrace.

She tries
With tears in her eyes
She is the only soul
I want by my side.