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Elle Apr 2022
It creeps in, silently,  it doesn't ask, it doesn't care.
It let's me keep you but takes you away little by little.
It robs us of us, who we were together, our memories that were just ours, now they are just mine and I will keep them safe mum.

I see you all the time but I miss you, I miss us, the old us, the silly us. Just us, the us only we knew.

How dare it take you away and let me watch, let me feel angry and so very very sad all at the same time.
And what's so cruel is the person I would confide in, tell my worries and innermost thoughts to is you. ❤️
Elle Nov 2018
The memory not very exciting
For everyone else it’s a bore
But the memory is warm and inviting
A glimpse back through yesterday’s door
Elle Nov 2018
Killed by the cuts
Let down and lost
Waiting lists to long
His pain was to great
Blood on their hands
A lost soul forever
Another young man taken his own life and he was waiting to be helped by a service that hardly exists, my heart bleeds and my tears flow. The 4th young man I have known of in two years .
Elle Nov 2018
Love died for you but mine carried on
Your love went to another
My ache marched on alone
I needed time to learn to love without you
I needed time to be me and not us
Mending was hard because the hurt was so bad
The loneliness of me not being part of you
The reality that we had become me
My love, my friend, my I tell you everything had gone
The feeling of loss ripped me apart

At times I still miss you
My love from so long ago
And my heart still aches just a little
For the love I lost
Elle Nov 2018
I can hear the sound of what I must do, follow and say
It’s noise is menacing, loud and cold
It dominates my world and my time
It pretends to be my friend
A robot I have become
a follower in society

But it can’t find me here
The timekeeper doesn’t exist
in this place I call my own
Locked away in my world
Society and it’s demands have no home here

I breath in the air
And it wakens me
I look up and the beauty in the sky warms my soul

I am shut off from the madness
And I become mindful of just being

My shoulders drop, my breathing slows,
my mind wanders and dances to its own song
Everything ceases for this short time
My time, special time, as I become just me

I hum as a song passes through my mind
Thoughts and feelings, yesterday’s and tomorrow’s
Like clouds floating by, they come and go
They come freely, they have time to grow and take me forward
Or to end and be left behind

I don’t want to be a robot marching through life

I open my eyes and I really see
I want to live as me
not follow the masses that are society

The blinkers are off
It’s time
Elle Nov 2018
I’m falling
My heart is ruling my head

Im crying
My heart has won

Which means
I have lost.
Elle Oct 2018
A happy ever after
she always thought she’d find

A little girl with hopes and dreams
the perfect prince in mind

There were no if’s or maybe’s
It would happen she was sure

When you’re eight you’re full of hope
she’d find that love so pure

The girl has gone a woman stands
with scars upon her heart

Those dreams are disappearing
the seams have ripped apart

Love finds love around her
How could it be so bold

Loneliness embraces her
It’s arms are hard and cold

She waits and waits with patience
Will she always be alone?

All she’s ever wanted
Was a love to call her own
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