never pretending
catching the
reflection of
each of
your heart beats
entwined
with mine.

and the
destination is
always the
same,

a glimpse
of heaven,

and this
moment of
everything
in your

eyes
tonight.

Indeed if
I could say
hello to
you again,

a first time,
a first smile
a first laugh

a first skip
of my heart.

no questions
asked
only forgiveness
that it
took me
so long
to walk
and dream
with you.

and see
the gentle
yet supple
corners of
your face.

and what
would I
give
and what
would my
life be....

without this
first chance
to say

for a
million times
over and over
again

hello.

Caterpillar
baby
watching
changing
right before
my eyes,

some shedding
shells,
some blooming
life never
to be recognized
again.

but in  
a moment
everything
is life
and endless
possibilities.

like the
moment I
saw my
first baby's

eyes.

like the
first moment
I fell
inside her
mothers
eyes.

and changed
forever...

from the
moment
of the
birth of
the first
threads
of my
breaths,

bleeding
into the
colors of
life.

I was
young
yet pure,

I was
then a
teenager
and wild
I was for
a moment
a young adult
sewing oats,

between the
moments
stolen in
your young
girl smile

and then
the sun
changed
the colors
of my bright
rainbow
hues,

and I
began to
fade into
this color
of white.

gently tattered.
and worn.

from life's
battles and
tender night
embraces...

till this
moment with
you where
each and
every night

you danced to
my thoughts
and threads
unraveling,

and with  you
still wrapped
.
with my love
and soul
around you.

until we
came to this
moment now
before us

the first
morning
without light

and the next
moment
that I

may die
with you.....

we were
puzzle pieces
that never
quite fit .

even now
many years
later and
a few
ruff edges
torn and
broken off,


edges
that still
reach out
and cut
and bleed
our heart,

fresh flesh
for the taking.

but still
at night I
dance clumsily
in my head
with you,

rarely making
eye contact,

breaking
emotional toes
and feelings
like they were
just peanuts
on a cheap
back water
bar floor.

and this is
all now
that is
left of us.

the puzzle
dance,

a beginning
that will
never end.

Your the
snowflake
looking for
redemption
as you
circle swirl
from the
ceiling of
this black
night,

and as
you settle.
upon my face

and slowly
melt upon
the corners
of my
mouth,

I stand
and
I wish
I was

kissing
you.

nothing to
say,

to the reflection
of your
picture
in my
shattered
hearts window.

thoughts and
feelings all
out of
bounds.

prayers
flying broken
circles
around  the
memory of
your angel
eyes.

and my
soul is
blind without
you here.

like sun
melting snow,

you were only
here for
far
too short
\
a time.