Bee - Hello Poetry

Bee Apr 2018

what if

One of the worst feelings is when
You can’t tell if you’re in love with someone anymore
When you like to be with them
But
You’re just as happy all alone
When you get so used to each other
You don’t even say “I love you” anymore
It’s just... assumed
But what if you don’t love them
What if you’re just convincing yourself that you can’t leave them
But it’s just because you don’t want to be alone again
That for the past 7 months you’ve just been glad to have someone
It didn’t matter who really
Except
This other person
Still is in love with you
Even though you aren’t pretty
Or smart
Or all that special
What if you’re just using this person because you know they like you despite all of your flaws
You’re afraid if you leave that no one else will care about you like they did
But
Despite all of this
You still don’t know if you actually love them

Bee Apr 2018

numb

I can’t feel
I can’t remember the last real feeling I had
The last time I thought to myself
“Wow, this is a very real emotion I am experiencing”
No
I don’t know what my last feeling was
Wether it was joy or sadness
Terror or disgust
Anger or lust
I can’t remember any emotion I have had recently
It’s all very... dull
Everything is black and white
I have yet to find color in anything as of late
Even the brightest of neon is easily dismissed by my retinas
It’s almost worrisome
At least
It would be if I were in the least bit concerned
No
In fact, I’ve come to terms with it
I let the numb settle in and it keeps me safe, hidden from any and all emotion

Bee Apr 2018

Piano

The melodies flow in and out of me
Tickling my spine with each soft trill
My finger naturally taps along with the sweet rhythm
As if I’ve heard this tune before
Each note engraves itself into my soul
Until my very being is a beautiful etching of millions of piano keys
Thousands of songs
Hundreds of notes
But just one soul
Filled with sweet songs
Feeding on more and more music until I explode and splatter my passion all over the world
Just to have it spat back at me
Broken and empty
I devour songs
Entire symphonies cannot escape my hunger for the beauty of music
The world drains me of my tunes
I fill myself back up and wait to be cruelly emptied once more
Like an evil waltz
The pitiful souls of this world destroy my love
Yet expect it to be filled when they return to empty me once more
This is why I will never be satisfied
No matter how many songs I stuff into my head
No matter how many melodies I force my ears to hear
I can never escape the cruel dance
And the pitiful souls that will forever keep me from being full

This is my first poem on this site! Enjoy!

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