my hands are not
the same ones
you once grasped
my heart not
the same one
you once held

if you thirst for the good things to happen
be patient
they will come in waves
like sheets of rain on dry pavement

it's strange how the
light purple marks she left
so intentionally at 1:20am
make me feel just
a little more human just
a little more breakable

there's something comforting about
returning to the basics
welcoming a heightened heart beat
with open arms
being okay
once again
with the sweat collecting on my palms
touching my knee to your's
barely enough
for you to even know I'm there

the frustration of having
so many thoughts but
no words
has me turning myself
inside out
searching for the only medicine
I've ever found effective

for the first time
my heart is
breaking and
the tears are abundant
but the words won't come

I spent at least two hours
chasing a blurry moon through
a ***** windshield
trying to figure out how
you could forget the face
of something, someone
you once wanted so badly
that you took it
without bothering to ask
whether I wanted to share it or not