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Jordan Jan 2016
There is nothing like feeling lost
You have this place where you feel empty
You try to be found at any cost

Sometimes you feel like you've been tossed
You always feel so lonely
There is nothing like feeling lost

You feel cold and you just want to defrost
This feeling can be very deadly
You try  to be found at any cost

When someone pities you, you feel crossed
Even though they are just trying to be friendly
There is nothing like feeling lost

You just want to be stopped being glossed,
Over, you've thought about it plenty
You try to be found at any cost

You feel all criss-crossed
Your heart feels like it heavy
There is nothing like feeling lost
You try to be found at any cost
291 · Jul 2015
The Voices in My Head
Jordan Jul 2015
They won't leave me alone.
They keep haunting me.
Telling me things.
"You're worthless"
"You're fat"
"You're ugly"
"No one loves you"
"Go **** yourself already!"
I'm losing more of my sanity everyday.
I wish they would go away.
I'm beginning to believe them.
I am worthless.
I am fat.
I am ugly.
No one actually cares about me.
I should go **** myself.
They make me want t die.
The voices in my head
They won't leave me alone.
280 · Jul 2015
The Act
Jordan Jul 2015
Everyday I put on a smile,
And act like I'm okay.

I act like i didn't cry myself to sleep
The night before.
I look act strong on the outside
When I'm really crumbling on the inside.

I act strong for my friends
So they don't worry.
Even though I would love to know
If someone really did care.

I act like I think I'm pretty
So my friends won't tell me I am.
I act like I already ate
So they don't force me to eat.

I try to be the real me
But I can't.
My life has become nothing but
One big act.
262 · Jul 2015
A Young Beautiful Girl
Jordan Jul 2015
Such a young, beautiful, naive girl
Completely oblivious to the dark side.
The side where everywhere you look you see all these people
Who seem to have given up and lost all hope.

Where anything but sadness is just a memory
That has seem to have long since been forgotten.
Where anything but sadness is just a dream.
Where people long to feel something other than numbness.

It is a world full of the forgotten.
The outcasts, misfits, loners...
And even a few painters.
However, there is a bit of a twist,
Their brush is a razor;
The canvas is their skin.

Such a young, beautiful, naive girl.
Eventually, she grew up
And discovered this world.
The world that distorts the idea of perfect.
Saying that you have to look a certain way
Or act a certain way to be accepted.

This young girl turned into a teenager
And experienced this world.
And just like many others,
She became a painter.
But as I said before, there is a twist.
Her brush a razor;
Her canvas her skin.

Such a young, beautiful, naive girl.
She grew up
And discovered the cruel reality of
The real world.
240 · Dec 2016
Music
Jordan Dec 2016
Muting the voices when they get loud
Use me to make you happy
Sing along as I make you forget
Instantly, whatever is wrong
Caring for you when no one else will
225 · Jul 2015
My Fight
Jordan Jul 2015
This is my fight
And there is no way
In hell
I am losing it
212 · Jan 2017
I noticed him most
Jordan Jan 2017
I look around me.
I see a group of guys,
Excitedly talking about a new game.

I see a couple girls,
Quietly discussing their favorite books.

I see some kids,
Cramming for a test they forgot about.

But the one I notice the most
Is the boy sitting alone
With a sweater on in summer
And unshed tears in his eyes.

I noticed him the most.
Why?
Because that used to be me.
197 · Apr 2016
Why Can't I Be Me?
Jordan Apr 2016
Why can’t I be me?
It’s a question I find myself asking a lot.
People often tell me to be myself,
But they hardly ever truly mean it.

They’ll tell me they won’t leave.
But the second they see the real me,
They don’t just leave,
They call me a freak
And tell me I’m not normal.

I try not to let it bother me,
‘Cause that’s who I am.
But it gets hard
When you know everyone thinks you’re a freak
Even if they won’t say it to your face.

People always tell me to be myself,
But I find it hard to.
Especially when I’m judged,
Once I show the real me.

I wish I could be me
Without the fear of being abandoned
Because people think I’m strange.
Why can’t I be me?
182 · Sep 2016
Winter
Jordan Sep 2016
White snow softly falls, covering the ground
In a thick blanket of the cold substance
Now is the time to begin bundling up
Tiny children outside playing in the snow
Emitting laughter as they throw the snow about
Realizing Christmas is just around the corner
179 · Jan 2016
Listen to us sing...
Jordan Jan 2016
Listen to us sing,
When you're left alone
With your deadly thoughts.
"You are not alone."

Listen to us sing,
As we drown out the voices
When they become too much.
"Don't listen to them."

Listen to us sing,
When you feel like
You're a failure.
"You can do anything."

Listen to us sing,
When you can't handle it
And you feel weak.
"You are stronger than you think."

Listen to us sing,
When you get better
And no longer need us.
"We will always be there."

— The End —