She had me pushed up against a wall,
And so many wishes fell a part,
I could not count the thoughts that left me,
Nor could I count or comprehend the way I felt,
I could grasp and guess at it,
As though some moonlit, angelic, breath had wrapt itself
around my neck, in such a lifely grasp,
Nothing that could ****, but everything that could do the opposite,
She told me a story, and so many other stories that I can not remember
with lips, such imperfect lips, and such hard hitting silence,
Against this wall, it was another life, another living, a dream
Inside places, worldy, unimaginable places that can only exist
in moments, everything leaves you but a graceful moment.

Memories of perfect moments, stop themselves
against mindful windows and scenery, landscapes, and lovely melodies,
They pin themselves so tragically against against a fate that will be forgotten,

I am grateful, and in a dreary storm of longing
for these moments full of perfection, are stuck with smiles
archived and buried upon themselves,
To reach and grasp, empty handed, convinced and frightened,
I reach out for something, quite the something,
That, can no longer be reached out for.

I thought this up last night:

She left, crossed a river,
Didn't come back,

I fed it with my tears, let the currents grow strong

Everyday I'd think,
Everyday I'd call,

I tried to build a bridge to get to her,
I did,
I ran, I jumped, I crawled to get to her.

She kept on walking,
Didn't notice my running,

I fed it with my tears,
Sides began to errode,

I forgot to call,

The river only got higher,
It grew faster and the bridge began to fall,

My heart tried to leave me a message,
Like I gave her messages every once in a while.

It told me she was gone, it said that she left,
The river was too strong,

It only got stronger, with every tear,
It grew bigger,
It grew faster,

With every thought that hit my mind,
I didn't know what to do,

Where has my heart gone?
Did it fall into the river?
Did it fall into the river?

Washed away with all the tears,
All the dirt,
All the sticks,
All the stones,
All the bones,

My heart lost it's home,
On the other side of the river,
She took it away,
My heart, she stole it

My body went through withdrawal,
Without a heart, what can you do?

I learn't to live with it, eventually I crossed the river too.

But not for long,
I fell apart,
It's impossible to live without a heart,

My tears fell hardest,
The river became a sea,
An ocean

Impossible to cross,
You took my heart and tore me apart,
You left,
Without it, I cried, I died,

Divided by the current,
I faded away.

Sadness speaks,
Like your smile that never sleeps,
While I lie awake,
And I remember your eyes,
That grab and twist,
My falling heart,
And I leave and look,
As you melt when no one’s looking,
Consume an empty mind,
With thoughts like ice,
In the cracks of diamond rock,
Breaking me apart,
Destroying my sullenly dying heart.

Fix a ticking clock that never ticks,
Melt this rocky soul,

Like a smile from the living dead,
A world without dreams.

Listen to the words,
Read them like you're supposed to know the back of your hand,
Be truthful though,
You know the back of his more than yours,
A bit, more than a bit, harder than a tender caress,
What happened to your dreams?
What happened to promises, vows,
Smiles, memories and what you planned on becoming,
Do the tears drown the pain?
And when you walk down the street,
With a bruise on your cheek,
And a masked on smile,
Do you think they believe you?

Close your eyes,
And wake up.

I'd keep every promise you'd make me make,
But what have you ever asked for?
And I keep wishing you'd ask for the world,
And then I'm afraid if you did,
I couldn't get it,
Planned it out, peice by peace,
I think, I thought,
How I could get you the world,
From the biggest to the the smallest,
Doesn't matter what kind of promise,
You say you don't have what you need?
What the **** do we need?
To breathe,
And we all need a heart to breathe,
Say your hearts lost, and I don't care any more,
You've got mine, and who the hell needs two hearts?
We aren't aliens and we aren't octopi or squid,
And we aren't worms either, they don't even have hearts,
Sometimes we all seem heartless though,
Forget to breathe, faint a little inside,
Hope is hard to catch,
It'll take you a while, if you haven't done it before,
Like catching a butterfly, it'll take some time,
But once you realize the beauty you have in your hand,
You'll let it loose,
You gave me a butterfly, and I wish I could give it back,
But I let it loose,
And I'm beginning to think,
I lost it.

Smile wont you please,
I'll beg on my knees,
You wont see me here on the grass or on the street,
Alone sittin on  my knees,
But you got a promise,
And a trust you'd only get from me,
And I know they just sound like words,
Letters, symbols, not that much,
But these words are thoughts,
And thoughts can tell so much,
A picture, movie, even life,
So let these thoughts be true and those muscles twitch,
So I can give meaning to this life.

I guess I had my arms on wrong,
My heart upside down,
I just wanted to hold you,
I didn’t want to see you frown,
I guess I had my eyes looking the wrong way,
Just wanted to see your eyes clear of tears today,
Maybe it isn’t so simple, maybe my ribs don’t protect
Much at all, maybe I could be hopeful,
Maybe I just want an end,
A nice quick fall.