i. I've fallen for the way you write certain letters in two separate strokes, almost as if telling them that every single part of them is unique and deserves more.

ii. The way our nails are shaped the same, as if our bodies were made to match, if only barely.

iii. When you grind your teeth while arguing with me. As though your mere teeth could crush everything you ever hated about me.

iv. Or as if you could trample all of the words you didn't want to hear me say.

v. There are thousands of buildings I'd jump off to remind myself of how it felt to fall for you.

vi. I liked the adrenaline of falling but I'm done falling for you.

Every traitorous thought you harbour
ties a small rock to your ankle
as you tread water in the open ocean.

Every spiteful thought from a family member,
friend, acquaintance, stranger
ties another.

It weighs you down,
of course it would.
You know how to swim,
you know how to float and tread water.

But that is not what will save you.

Everyone tires eventually.

You hold a pair of scissors in your hand.
It is slightly blunt,
of course it is.
You've cut your wrists and thighs and stomach,
your worth
so many times.

But even the bluntest of scissors will be helpful
when you're about to drown.
Wear down the string
then leave them behind on the ocean's floors.

It is easier to cut away what weighs you down
than try and pretend it doesn't bother you.

HEART/MIND
You’ve read enough books to fill 7 billion minds
But the moment you lost yourself to his eyes -
Grey, blue, green, mixed and alone,
7 billion minds became one fleeting heart.

MIND/MATTER
They say, mind over matter
But how could that work
When you were everything that
ever mattered on my mind?

MATTER/INTANGIBLE
All that mattered, I could touch
Matter leaves and you become imaginary
Hurt wraps and coils
All that mattered, I cannot touch

INTANGIBLE/LOVE
Love is immeasurable, intangible.
Lies, lies!
It was as alive as my lips
when I traced your skin
Or your eyes
when you said my name.

LOVE/LOSE
Fighting a war neither side knew how to fight
Feel the hand that loved you
As it reaches out and takes your heart,
Crushing it slowly
No battle has finished but the war is done.

LOSE/LOST
I woke up at
0347
And I cried like
I had never cried before
Clawing at skin as though
It was diseased
For I was lost
And I had lost
And for the rest of of my life I knew I would
Lose

LOST/RECOVERY
It's learning how to stand again
Then walk,
then run.
But after you've lost, recovery doesn't always work
Sometimes Fate sticks her leg out
To watch you fall

RECOVERY/GONE
And you never get up from that place again.

Of all the stars in the sky,
you were the loudest, the brightest,
the one that spoke my name,
the one that kept me sane,
the one that was the light to guide me home.

Of all the stars in the sky,
you’ll be the one I always treasure, forever,
the one that made me laugh,
the one that made me cry,
the one that eventually made it all worthwhile.

*When love seems to have faded, we’re just lost in the confusion, the anger, the stress, but the love is always there waiting to be uncovered once more. When we feel as though we’re drowning, if we try a little harder, we’ll find the shore, it’s not too far, love, we’ll get there, sooner or later.

A boy once jokingly asked me,
"If you could **** anyone in the world, who'd it be?"
It took me almost an hour to reply
because despite the question's joking nature,
the only answer I could think of was "me".

I wanted to write
something that could capture
the way you held me
when I was scared of the dark
but also scared of
the flashing lights
that lit false paths.
Words to express
how much I appreciate
you
and everything you've done for me.
For you hid me from death
and protected me
when I deserved much less.
Something to show the world
that in dark there could be light
and that that light
was you.

Don’t dance with the faeries,
don’t trust in half-truths.
They’ll leave you broken.
A beautifully shattered mirror.

Don’t deal with the devil,
don’t trust in promises.
They’ll leave you falling.
An innocent child turned renegade.

Don’t sing with the sirens,
don’t trust in lulling songs.
They’ll leave you gasping.
A soul burnt to the ocean floor.

Don’t believe in anybody,
don’t listen to practiced lies.
They’ll leave you bleeding.
They’ll leave you broken,
                                        falling,         ­                                     

                          ­                         gasping.

**We are the worst of all creations.
We destroy all that has been made.