Thousands of crystals spiraling around my head swirling and twirling creating the illusion of a perfect world....

White roses in a bundle,
Their fragrance caresses my senses as I rise my hand
To join yours.
Your hands, they trembled
But it wasn't what I thought;
You weren't nervous, but terrified.
Trapped in a room without a door.
Pretty faces caught your eye once more,
I grow weary just thinking of the score.
Competition, there was none.
How does a rounded belly full of your child,
Compare to a thin waist?
Still,
You couldn't see the damage that was done;
You only looked at me with distaste.
Beaten and sometimes bloodied,
I never amounted to you,
You dragged my soul through the dirt;
It’s ragged and muddied.
Much too soon my belly again bloomed,
Within an innocence that came of your evil.
You still prowl and feast upon the broken,
I paint on a smile whilst in my mind,
Screaming the words that went unspoken.
Again you struck but this time with vengeance,
You stole a piece of soul from one of my own.
A wound cut too deeply to heal,
Everything that once was beautiful in you
At long last died;
I am nauseous at your presence.
Tortured, and caged no more;
Cracked, age yellowed petals
Scattering to the wind
As the wedding bouquet;
So perfectly preserved,
Falls to the soot covered floor.
You once called me your princess of the stars;
Queen of the moon.
Our reign together has been nothing but agony;
Deepened wounds never healed but always left the scars,
I surrender my crown I abdicate;
A position I want never to resume.
A caged wretched bird no longer,
My wings have spread wide;
Out of the flames of hell.
I leave the burning memories behind now that I'm stronger,
No more your haunted bride;
Out of the ashes I rise.
A phoenix,
I have overcome your spell.
But I still keep that memory of
White roses;
Their beauty and fragrance,
That’s all.

I despise you, everything that you are.
You have the disguise of an angel, beautiful and fair.
In truth under the mask, you are a demon, with a matching heart.
I want to scratch your blue eyes out with my nails; I want to rip out your lovely hair.  
I want to destroy you, just like you destroyed me; I want to be your torture.
The very thought of you makes me sick,
You are such a loathsome creature.

I walked through a meadow that once was full of summer cheer.
Now it’s filled with winter, there’s nothing for me here.
You were my summer, my love, my life.
You broke me into bits, cutting deeper into my heart like a knife.

I’m coming apart at the seams, because I’m picturing you in all of my dreams.
One punch and I’m down for the count, only had one chance and I lucked out.
I’m stuck in this timeless tragedy,
Guess I’ve gotta endure this insanity.

Suicide suicide,
not much longer til the noose is tied.
The rope snaps;
wine-glass filled with acid,
bottoms up and down the hatch;
how I long for a casket.
Not a drop makes it to my cracked lips,
maybe this knife hanging from my hips;
will perhaps do the trick.
The blade is dull and rusted;
now I linger atop a spiral staircase
flying down to meet the marble ground,
Now I wish my skull was not busted
my neck not twisted around it's base,
I scream out my pain yet there is no sound.
Suicide suicide,
I really didn't want to die.

Mary Shepherdess with hair the color of bark
lead your sheep astray;
To the writhered valley deep in the dark
where the demons and witches play.
Little lamb be not afraid
your mistress is near;
don't listen to what she may say
she is Fear.

First there were two,
But somehow that ended up as three.
Four became six all to soon,
too many to count you should have just stuck to me.

Quite frankly I'm surprised
you've made it out;
with no ***'s or STD's having made you their prize
it's very odd no doubt.

Jagged shrapnel protrudes from my bleeding heart;
each fragment representing
a word
thought
or even a look,
they have left their mark.
Little by little the piercing metal
eliminates my existance.

The agony runs deep within my veins;
my fingernails bear down against my frozen flesh,
still I feel no pain.
I am at the stage of despair that nothing matters,
nothing feels.
I just roam from one side of this stoney prison to another,
my mind disappearing farther and farther.
I am dead without dying,
alive but no longer living.

A valuable lesson has been learned today
the conclusion made clear,
Love is a myth and this is what I say
this is what is truth and listen to what I say here!
Men use women feeding us pretty lies,
and once they're appetite is filled
they're hunger satisfied;
They feed us to the beasts our bodies broken and our blood spilt.
We are the unwanted scraps
the forgotten and damaged,
But I'm tired of keeping these thoughts we all have under wraps
And if I offend you dear liars, you'll just have to manage.

Smoke blacken sky
flames rise from the anguish,
her hands soaked in crimson dye
a trail of the shattered corpse she's vanquished.
The inferno consumes,
swallowing her whole.
Taking  the life that once charmed and yet confused,
Death becomes her; and her firey soul.

Just open your eyes,
open them and see.
My fire is intensifying,
the flames are rising.
Watch your ashes fly,
watch as they flutter all around me.
You thought you were the only one who could do the burning,
dead wrong
It's my turn now; and your anguish is just the beginning.

Perspiration drips from ivory fingers,
The sounds of passion clouding her thoughts deep within.
Upon this forbidden plane she'll not linger,
From Aphrodite's arm she descends.
Hearts no longer racing,
The Wolves are long gone.
Neither regrets nor contemplating,
It is time to carry on.
A purse pregnant with gold,
Body wrapped in Crimson.
Hence forth into the world so cold,
Another Lover waits with anticipation.

The clock on the wall reads 3am,
I'm still up unable to sleep.
Just passing time with ink and paper;
watching the world cave in.
My imagination runs wild,
and my thoughts are deep.
To me; sleep is a bothersome pest,
I've far better things to do than rest.

Here I am dangling on strings,
pull me this way and that way.
How I long to be free,
and not what they say!
I'm not your doll,
an object mean't for play.
No longer will I obey,
I choose not to stay.
I'll tear the ****** strings away,
and you'll never control me.
No longer your puppet in your play,
At last I am free!

In the shadows of night
a tortured creature,
I linger out of sight
seeking some form of twisted pleasure.
Watching as they join together
in one last lustful embrace,
the pain in my chest won't last forever
not after tonight;
she'll wish she'd been chaste.
Sleep peacefully
My trembling hands reach for the blade,
emerging from my cover quietly.
I stand over you now and the bed that you've made.
Pull back the sheet
revealing your glistening chest,
you awaken and  for a moment our eyes meet
for in that last moment my weapon found it's place of rest.
My hand reaches into the bleeding husk
and comes out holding your heart,
I'll leave your lover asleep in your rusty musk
and from this scene; I forever part.

Toss me out like the garbage,
I'm no good for you.
There's nothing in this hollow husk left to salvage,
I've got nothing I can prove.
I'm so **** confused,
Broken and lost.
bloodied. And bruised,
I'm not worth the cost.

Bound by fate,
laced in love.
It's clear I'm much too late,
pushed me aside like an old glove.
I told you it was "til death do us part",
so don't pretend you didn't know it going in.
You're the bullet that shot me clear to the heart,
call in the coroner; and give me my coffin.
Wearing my necklace of rope,
pen in hand; I sign my death warrant.
There's no way I could ever cope,
thoughts of life without you are abhorrent.
Before I go into the ground; put on my wedding band,
and dry those last tears I cried.
Carve my stone with those strong hands,
"Here lies my broken bride".

Fire in the drink,
I want to feel the burn.
Further and further I sink,
into the dark as I come to terms.
I tried to drown out your memories; your face,
even in this intoxicated stated I cannot escape them.
You haunt me; making me long for your embrace,
I will never be free of this pain; this mayhem.

If this world is a game,
a challenge to the death.
I'm just another tribute and you're the same,
each of us competing to take the other's last breath.
Only one will win they say,
only one comes out alive.
I go knowingly into a bloodbath this day,
and I'll try my damnest to thrive.
But you're doing it too,
just trying to live.
From this evil we withdrew,
an alliance is all I can offer; all I can give.
Friendship sparks,
fates collide.
Upon this unknown path we must embark,
and defeat the others in stride.
The journey's at it's end,
but the rules the same.
Only one will be Victor; only one to glory asend,
so one more death to close the game.
Defiance wins,
no more a pawn in this charade.
We know what the consequences will be; what will happen,
even with one nightmare done; another has just been made.
We'll get to live and see another day,
but there are now far worse games to play.

Oh darling don't feed me thoselines,
I've heard them all before.
Sweetheart don't waste my time,
I'd rather get on with life than settle some sort of score.
Either take what you see,
embrace me as you see fit.
Or release me,
and be done with it.

I'm releasing my inner huntress,
Sly and deadly.
I do not go to you; you come to me in my dark fortress,
captivated by my siren's melody.
With grace; I'll pounce upon your unsuspecting heart,
I'll devour it whole.
It is in fact an art,
to reclaim your lost soul.

We all have that little voice in our head,
that tiny being that supposedly helps us choose the right way.
Well mine's a royal ***** and and at time's I want to tell her to drop dead,
she's a nusiance; rather spiteful with every word she might say.
She's neither helpful or optimistic,
rather loathsome and quite sarcastic.
I just want to know which way to turn,
how to make the right choice.
But instead all I get is class dismissed; meeting ajourned,
nothing helpful nor comforting from that harsh little voice.
I really wish she'd drop dead,
just lay down and die.
I'm not sure; perhaps it's all in my head,
in fact I know it is and She's still there; forever on stand-by.

When you're holding her Darling,
safe in your arms tonight.
Do you think of me my Starling,
while you're in the dark; am I the light?
If you're kissing her her; do you see me Dear,
am I still in your mind?
Do I haunt you as you draw her near,
does she know that you're still mine?

Though I have long studied and admired the ancient tragedies,
I had no interest in becoming a part of their play.
In loving you I have taken part in this corrupted scene for which there is no easy remedy,
I have become the passionate lover by night,
the fate  forsaking victim  by day.
No longer am I myself,
She does not exist here anymore.
I take the appearance of someone else; though in it,
I fear my soul shall not soar.
I am Psyche beguiled by Cupid,
Persephone lured away and held captive with Hades.
I am Juliet taken with the forbidden Romeo; pathetically whimsical and stupid,
I am Cleopatra  besought-ed with Mark Antony in my Nile of water lilies.
Tragedy is never becoming not for a Queen nor Goddess nor even a commoner.
The only difference between the stories and myself is that it would seem you find this to be amusing,
not seeing you also play a part in this ill fated blunder.

Nothings gonna bring me down; I'm wild young and free.
If you don't like it that's fine by me.
I'm not here to impress you like a show for you to see.
I'm gonna spread my wings and soar I'm gonna just be.

Seems like it's finally coming to an end,
it's time to face the facts; we're through.
It's time to close the door no more playing pretend,
we both need to make the last move.
No more these thoughts of what we could have been,
it's pointless; like screaming until your lungs turn blue.
Take in a deep breath; stop thinking with my broken heart and just let it be,
I know what I must do next is for the best; though it's killing me.
It's time to lock up those memories; to toss away the key,
Instead of holding on to the box they're in; I'll drown it in the sea.
Now we are finished; there is no you and me,
Now we both are free.

Tonight I'll forget you and myself,
tonight I'm going to to be young and free.
Taking a dirt road with the radio blasting,
screaming from the back of somebody's truck.
I'm going to sit around with friends; not at home collecting dust on a shelf,
I'm just gonna BE,
tonight  I'm drinking fire from a plastic red cup.
We got those bonfires blazing, dancing around,
laughing at nothing.
Tonight we're gonna throw our hands up; scream and cuss,
tonight we're doing just what we wanna do.
Tonight I'm not missing us,
and tonight I'm not missing you.

I stole your shirt today,
Don't know why I did it really.
I've come to understand and accept the way things are,
But I still took that **** shirt.
Maybe its because your scent aways made me feel safe in any fray,
Yeah I know that sounds silly.
Maybe its because it was once was close to your now dead heart,
Perhaps its because deep down I'm still hurt.
Its not even much,
Just a plain white work shirt.
still its yours and brings back sweet memories and such,
Like how we use to lie in best and flirt.
Or maybe I'm just a hopeless fool,
just waiting for our souls to reconnect; to make another impact.
Or maybe Im just waiting for this to break out into a dual,
Either way you aren't getting your shirt back.

Sew my eyes shut,
I've seen enough of this decrepit world.
Fill my body with sweet chemicals,
The formaldehyde shall be my new liquor.
Red silk lining in an oak box,
Cover me with my black shroud.
I never held much beauty in life,
But death will hold me captive now.

Thin ribbons of freshly sliced flesh cover the floor,
As I stand from above your steel slab.
Your innards lie in a neat pile beside the door,
My "instruments" of pain and pleasure already lie within your future body bag.
I wanted to watch the glistening light in your eyes fade away before you died,
Pity I ripped them out so swiftly .
Your screams were symphonic in your last pleading cries,
The agony you felt must have seemed to gone on for eternity; for me it was over much to quickly.
Your once perfect body has been torn to bits,
Perhaps I was a little over zealous.
Carving into your chest was easy; my hands just slipping into it,
To tear out your heart all black and calloused.
I hold it for just a moment; pondering if I should put it in a jar, it after all was mine once before.
No I don't want it anymore; it won't ever change it hasn't so far, to the ground it goes to be pulverized into the concrete floor.
Now is the time to leave,
Before I go I'll place a farewell kiss upon your ****** frozen lips.
Adieu my fallen love; mon cheri!

Save me from the hell I'm living,
Save me from this agony.
My heart can't take anymore breaking,
My soul already lost at sea.
Every night I'm haunted,
And every morning Im crippled with madness.
Help me to overcome this pain ever so constant,
Help me to banish this sadness.
I can't do it on my own anymore,
I need to have some comfort.
You can make my spirits soar,
You can save me from this frightful sort.
Just help me,
Just help me.
Because i can't do it on my own.

I'm lying to myself again,
who shall i be this week.
Bottled blonde,
Girlish flair.
Brunette beauty,
Intellectual grace.
Fiery Ginger,
Strong and fierce.
Make up plastered to cover up the true me,
So i can go on being whichever personality you want me to be.
To eat or not to eat today,
Workout til your body gives out.
Hate myself for being this way,
But i can't stop this is what the games all about.
It never ends.
This game i play daily started out as just a way to stand out, stand up and scream "here i am! Please take notice of me! I'm doing this all
Can't you see I'm doing this all for you!"
ill be anyone you want me to be,
I just wont be me.

Save me from the hell I'm living,
Save me from this agony.
My heart can't take anymore breaking,
My soul already lost at sea.
Every night I'm haunted,
And every morning Im crippled with madness.
Help me to overcome this pain ever so constant,
Help me to banish this sadness.
I can't do it on my own anymore,
I need to have some comfort.
You can make my spirits soar,
You can save me from this frightful sort.
Just help me,
Just help me.
Because i can't do it on my own.

Dreams of death,
You only see smiles.
Longs for pain,
You only hear laughter.
Broken apart,
You think I've got it all together.
Needs release,
You believe I'm free already.

Lying on the stretcher,
Medicine man says she's already gone.
Heart failure or something like that,
No one suspects the truth.

Sitting hunched at the end of the bed we share,
I'm listening to the sound of your obnoxious snoring.
I'm shedding a trail of tears whilst you sleep on; oh how you dare,
How you spew your lies and go on blissfully ignoring.

Seven seals will be broken,
Seven angelic horns will sound.
Nation will turn against nation,
There shall be evil all around.
The Deciever will take many,
Poor souls ensnared within his blasphemy.
Many will be persecuted for following our Saviour; our Lord Almighty,
Giving are lives so that others will know the truth is a worthy priority.
I will not bow to the false prophet,
I will not fall into the web of lies.
I am a Believer and they can't stop it,
For Him i will give up all; even if that means my life.

I torn your heart right from your chest today,
I felt its last pathetic beating.
I warned you in the beginning this wouldn't last more than some-odd days,
you just kept on believing.
You asked why,
I said I didn't love you.
I never lied,
I just didn't always tell the truth.