Parker

Parker Dec 2024

i got my blood drawn today
and all i wanted to do was call you.
i hate needles and you’d always talk me through it.

i did it by myself today,
i wonder if you’d be proud of me

i knew even if i tried calling you for support you wouldn’t answer.

Parker Dec 2024

my final act of love will be letting go.

i hope you find what i gave you
in someone else.

i would’ve crossed oceans for you if you asked me to do so.
even though one of my biggest fears is open water.

Parker Dec 2024

easy like a sunday morning

you’re not hard to love.
you make love feel like fresh pressed coffee atop the window sill.
like the first warm breeze of spring.
you are everything warm in the world encapsulated into one living being.
you are love, in every sense of the word.

you are worth the work.

Parker Dec 2024

your voice is fading and so am i

your silence is agonizing.
i got so used to never hearing from you,
only for it to change in a second.

now you’re gone again.
leaving me right when you had roped me back in.

i wish you’d let me love you,
for old times sake.

Parker Dec 2024

could i call you tonight?

would you feel sick if i called you?
would your stomach knot up, turning into twists and turns?

would you tell me to not do that again?
to leave you alone and let you call me when you’re available?

what would you do?
i miss your voice.

Parker Dec 2024

A Notre Dame lego set.

I bought the legos you promised you’d build with me years ago.
Laying in the dark of your room, we promised it would be our first big set.
Built together.

I will leave the last piece off, incase you ever wish to fulfill that promise.

Parker Dec 2024

i hate being lied to, you know that.

you said you missed me,
that you still loved me and thought about me every day.

you said i was beautiful,
and that you missed the way my eyes lit up.

you said you’d get an apartment,
and have me over every night.

why’d you say these beautiful things,
if all these things
were just lies?

sorry guys i’m crashing out.
i’m literally IN LOVE with this guy and he keeps disappearing on me. he told me he needed time to get his head straight and i totally understand that, and am giving it to him. but i’m starting to think he just didn’t wanna talk to me anymore. maybe im just overthinking it and losing my mind for no reason.
but i dunno.
ty, if you see this, please just tell me you’re okay. we’re okay…