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The New Kestrel Jul 2013
nootherpoetrycanmakemefeelasyoursdoes
The New Kestrel Jul 2013
iamsoscaredforthefuturebecauseicantseeit
The New Kestrel Jul 2013
3mm
It is not three millimeters.
Or maybe it is
And its symbolic.
A short distance compared to
The mile that is my life.

No. Its the
Three Month Mark.
The thing I'm scared of.
Every time I've tried something,
And I've been happy,
It ends at three.
Three something.
Hours,
Days,
Weeks,
or Months.

We've passed a few of those,
But "months" is coming.
Fast.
I hope it's wrong.
The New Kestrel Jul 2013
My first thought is
I love you.
I want you.
I'm scared to go farther.
To hurt you.
But I still wonder if you'd let me.

This love and pain and wonder
Is eating me alive.
I worry constantly.
Especially since the pain
Will not be mine.

I am scared that
Our feelings will fade.
Wash away like a memory.
I'm scared to go farther.
To drive you away.
But I still wonder
If you'd stay.

This curiosity kills me.
Lightning in our skies.
Fringing the ends of my heartstrings,
Encasing me in my own lies.
My mind tells me
something is to come.
All I need to know,
Is that it's false.
Not written in my point of view. As I believe another views it.
The New Kestrel Jul 2013
connections are strange.
And i wonder what kind we have.
i know i love you and i know you love me.

do we have a spiritual connection?
meant to teach eachother about the world in our own eyes?
or is it only physical?
only when you touch me or when i kiss you?

do we have a mental connection?
can we trust eachother with secrets and
emotions?
or is that too much for you?

we joke, but we dont have many deep talks.
not about us,
family,
or even the weather and how it makes us feel.
i try,
but are you interested?

do you try to hide from me?
thats how it seems.
only short answers and "yes, im fine."
but i know otherwise.

why wont you confide in me?
thats what im here for.

Every day i feel more and more as though
youre using me as a distraction.
from the trauma
from the curiosity,
from the confusion.

are you?
The New Kestrel Jun 2013
You unknowingly reach to me.
Feel the energy in your fingertips when you touch me.

I can feel it, too.

It feels warm,
Cold,
Fuzzy,
Pressurized.
It makes me shiver.

You've done it.
You've accomplished the next step.
You have the sight,
Now you have the touch.

**I can teach you more.
The New Kestrel Jun 2013
ohbutitisfair.wearenoweven.besidesivegivenyoulessthanyouvegivenme­
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