Once a world void of color,
Empty.
Dark.
Lonely.
Turned bright.
Full of color,
But still
Empty.
Dark.
Lonely.

Only stillness lived
In the world full of color.
Once
Void of color.
Until
One minute passed.
A soft whistle,
A chill,

And blackness.

A buzz.
A flash.

Colorless.

The light switch broke.
I can't fix it,
But you can.

Do you know?
Because I sure as hell don't...
I know a lot of people have this.
This 'disorder.'
I know some people understand.
Understand what it's like.
I know I am not alone.
But no one knows
Me.
My hell,
My head,
Me.
Most people know why.
Most people have reasons.
Most people have excuses.
Not me.
I don't know why.
I don't have reasons.
Do you know?

I like you.
That's all there is to it.
I like you.
But we can't.
I'm still young.
But so are you.
My mother doesn't approve.
Yours?
Its because of experience.
Your experience.
But is that it?
Or is it because...
You are a girl, too?

findtherealitythatsuitsyoubest.goforit

"Get her, girl!"
"Talk to her!"
"Are you two...?"
"Ask her out!"

No!
Maybe?
Okay.
But I don't know!
We're just teenage girls!
Why is there so much pressure!?
So much rain?
This flower needs water,
But there's already too much!
Soon it will die.
Drowned.
I want to, but,
Then again,
I don't know if I should.
I wish to love
While I'm still young.
To Love Young
But,
This?
It's more like...

Love Maybe...

I'm indecisive!
I can't help it!
I'm lost!



I'm scared...

I am treated
Like a useless little girl.
I'm sure a lot of women are.
For example,
When I was little,
I wanted to learn how to carve wood.
I asked my father for a pocket knife.
He told me,
"No. You are too little and fragile.
You might hurt yourself."
I agreed. I was small.
But my brother,
Three years younger,
Asked the same a few months later.
And he got what he wanted.

And then,
Years later,
My brother did the same.
He was told by our mother
To chop ice in the winter.
I knew he wasn't strong enough.
He isn't athletic or strong
As I am.

I asked to do it while he did my assigned chore.
Dishes.
A "woman's chore."
My brother,
My younger,
Smaller,
Weaker brother
Said to me
"Its a big job.
I think I should do it.
You are a girl, after all."
He went and came back.
whining that it was too difficult.

I went and got it done.
Without breaking a sweat.
And then he blamed me for being sexist
And rubbing it in that i was stronger,
When I never said a word.
I just sat,
Clicking my T.V. remote.

I thought about all of the other times,
Countless times in my life when I was treated like this
My most all men in my family.

Really?
I'm the sexist one?

confusionistheonlyparasitetoeverentermybody