When it is time to finally let go
When it is time to forget her and move forward
I know it can sometimes hurt
But it doesn't compare to the pain she has already caused
I am getting better I am becoming stronger
I had become so lost in her fake love
I can now see her for who she truly is for who she truly was
I fell in love with the girl I hoped her to be
I fell in love with a girl that never existed
But I am getting better I am becoming stronger

Little sad girl please don't cry anymore
You are young and pretty, don't you see?
The sun is shining and the birds are still singing
The world has not stopped living and neither has your little big heart
Listen carefully and you will hear your heart is still beating
Little sad girl dry those big beautiful eyes of yours
They are making you blind to all that will make you smile
The flowers will always bloom
The sun will rise and the sun will set
The moon will brighten up the night skies with a bit of moonlite
Little sad girl please take a closer look at what we call life
I know it can seem rough but that's what makes us strive
Little sad girl look at the world and smile

I run and hide inside a place I call my head
I stay for hours in the surrounding walls of my mind
Escaping to a forrest of random scattered thoughts
that float in and out of space
For each one I capture I make there cage a blank sheet of paper
A display of words forming sentences created by my thoughts
Go ahead and take a peak
You found this old journal sitting in my room cluttered amongst my books while I wasn't there
Even though it clearly said in bold black letters Do Not Read you went ahead and turned to the first page
Instant break of a unspoken trust
My feelings, memories, moments
My thoughts, dreams, emotions
My love my loss my heart break
These were my private things and not for you or anyone else to read
The only thing I can honestly call my very own
My innocence my childhood the only thing a young girl can call her very own was stolen was taken a long time ago by a figure in the dark
This is all I had to call my own

I feel drained of life, like who pulled the plug in the bathtub?
Just like an empty tub I am an empty shell of a human being
with nothing left to offer any longer
Where has all my love for life gone?
I use to be a soaring bird with beautifully colored feathers
that shined bright in the golden sunlight
I've lost my color I've lost my shine
I feel as if I'm becoming a ghost of the past
I'm dark and grey, a flightless bird
that now sits on a perch with broken wings a broken heart and broken dreams

She hides her crying face behind her cold and shaking hands
She hides in pain she hides in shame
She doesn't want the world to see her this way
Begging to the night skies that someone would wipe her falling tears away
She closes her weeping eyes and dreams of a time when she use too smile so bright
What happened to all the sunshine that once beamed in her eyes?
Her once infectious laughter has become a whimper in the darkest of shadows
Where is the little girl that use to play in her sundress on the most rainy days?

As selfish as it is we shouldn't be angry at the people we love for taking their lives.
Their pain was too great that nothing could help it.
I feel like that sometimes.
This God awful emotional pain that feels like it is eating away at my soul.
Nothing can fill that void of sadness similar to a black hole that swallows what little happiness I  have.
Not all the money in the world could buy me happiness.
The girl of my dreams not even the girl I am in love with could save me from my darkness.
My ma, my real life superhero could not bring light into my dark life.
Why go through life feeling this way?
It is an invisible pain that no one can see or touch.

When she smiles, the way she does
when she looks at me
I feel warm inside
all those same  butterflies arise
and I feel myself becoming lost in her sunshine