Not
Alpaca
Just
Llama

You killed her.
You may not realize
what you've done.
You may not've killed
her physically, but emotionally
she's gone.

They run my life
they make it all better
they're my bestfriend,
lover, teacher, mother.
I wish I could escape
but I'm addicted.
An addiction to cope
with the one lost.
As soon as you left me
I wasn't sure what to do
I was addicted,
addicted to you.
They help me with
a bit of the pain.
But when you left
you took a part of me away.

You have a cycle:
-Light up
-Use
-Step all over
-Move on to the next
That's what you did to me...
And so many others.

The sadness consumes me,
Buries me alive.
I can't even tell you
The last time I
Was happy. Every
One tells me we have
Our ups and downs.
So why have I been
Down for so many years?
I hear all the time,
"You choose to be happy or sad."
Is I could choose to be
Happy trust me I'd be
There. Those people are
The ones with the perfect
Lives, no problems.
They don't get flashbacks,
Have anxiety attacks, are
Depressed. They don't know
What it's like. As Hope
Once told me, "Now days
People cut over dumb little
Things like their goldfish dying,
These people could never
Handle a day in our shoes."

I have dreams.
Oh, yes I have tons.
They will never come
True, that's why
They're dreams. I
Have dreams of
Being in your arms but
That won't happen because
You're not mine. I have
Dreams of becoming a performer,
Singer, being in the spotlight but
I can't do that because of my
Anxiety and all the scars on my
Arms and legs.
People say never doubt your
Dreams, but I say give up on them
Before they become an obsession.

Roses are black
Violets are black
I said I love you once
and you didn't say it back
Why'd I make such a big mistake?
I'm about to crack,
my heart is shattered.
The colors I once saw I now lack.
You were the color,
you also took that,
along with my heart,
now all I see is black.

That's all I feel
anymore. I haven't
been happy for what
feels like ages.
What you did to
me hurt, killed.
I am nothing.
I have nothing.
I am empty.

The irony.
Your name's
Hope and you
Have none.

We all strive for perfection
Not even knowing what it is.
We all want the next best
Thing, clothes, shoes, people.
That's human nature.
We all want perfection,
But no one can have it.

What did I do
to deserve such
pointless love from you?
Don't get me wrong, I love you forever but
what you give me
means nothing. It's not
even love it's friendship.

I don't believe in
what most people do.
Honey, you're what I want
to worship.
You are my religion.

I never knew what
falling really was until
I met you. Falling
wasn't a danger or
threat, but it was
nonetheless a beautiful thing.
It gave me confidence,
courage, bravery, excellency, truth,
and most importantly it
gave me my wings,
taught me how to
fly. Now that I
can fly the distance
between us is no
longer a burden, but
only a few flip
of my wings away.
Thank you love for
teaching me how to
fly, fly away to
my love miles away.
Distance is now not
a burden. Now that
love has given me
my wings.

What is love?
Is it that feeling
you get when you
look into my eyes?
Or is it that
first warm day of
the season type of
feeling? What is love?
I've always wanted to
know. But now that
I've met you I
know exactly what it
is. It's that warm,
fuzzy feeling inside when
you say my name,
smile my way, touch
me ever so lightly,
hug me in the
gentlest way, say those
words to cheer me
up, when you tell
a joke, when you
blush everytime you're around
me, talk about me
to other people, when
you see my face
in a picture. I
know what love is
now. Thanks for helping
me define it.
**You are love

I've always had an
Deep love for eyes.
They tell me so much.
They aren't just a color.
They show emotion.
I know when you're
Sad, mad, happy, excited,
Just from your eyes.
Now all I see is
Pain and hatred.
Eyes can give me more
Words than you can.
I know how you feel
About me... Just from
Your eyes.

We may not admit
Out hatred for people but,
We all have it toward
Someone. And obviously
Yours is toward me.

They all tell me
"You need help."
No I dont I need
Love, someone to hold,
Happiness.

I'm in love with you,
but I don't know if I'll ever tell you.
It happened so fast, like hurricane winds.
I usually have no problem
stating my feelings.
So why is this so hard?
I know you'll read this.
I hope that you'll know
just who you are.
I need you to know this,
I know we'll probably
never meet face-to-face
but I certainly do love you,
for the real you...
I'm not like the other girls,
falling for your looks.
I'm falling for your words,
your personality, for the you
no one else gets to see,
the one you are to me.
Darling, I love you,
I hope and wish you'd
love me too.