There are so many words that I could use
But it does not matter which I choose
None could explain that feeling I received
That once more had made me believe
Your love is strong and oh so true
With that in mind I'm never blue
But as time passes oh so slow
I think to myself where'd you go.
Then my I remember your in my heart
Because of that we're never apart.

I wish my world was in sync with what I am and what I want
but its not nor will it ever be.
To be loved is to be wanted, needed, accepted.
Trust is a no brainer too for those that are true,
too many nights I lie awake wondering what I can do
But the day comes as sleep takes my mind
and in the morning light I find
a woman that wants to be mine.
Forced by the forces of the world to remain the same
I look deep into the back of my mind and once again find
a love that is there but refuses to cross the line.
why can't I have everything I want?
Others do and are content with what they have
because they have what they want.
I wish I was a simple man that wanted simple things
But I'm as simple as a deafening silence.
Oxymoronic with a demonic emotion that remains selfish
yet selfless in all I do.
May my ego be taken from me someday
and on that I shall lay
upon my grave.
My ego is all I am that keeps me moving
and daily it is attacked without regard
I had a belief that I was great at something.
But then I *** to find out
I'm not even great to be looked at.
Here is my ego on display for the world
and here is a man broke and broken.

Jealousy is a strange demon.
I go through my girlfriends pics and I find exactly what anyone would expect to find.
Memories.
How can I ever be jealous of a memory?
I mean she had a life before me
I wish she didn't.
It would be nice if everything disappeared.
He's specter that won't go away.
She holds him in my minds eye
closer than she wants
but further than I believe.
There is nothing I can do.
I can't mention it to her because its irrational
and built on jealousy;
which has no place in what her and I are building.
The days ahead are going to be harder
than the ones that have past.
Joy may be the outcome
or devastating sorrow.
As for me on this night of sleeplessness.
I post to Facebook
looking for solace in words.
I love her,
she loves me
Our future together is bright.
She is driven and intelligent.
How he let her go
I will never know,
but the fact remains
that I am here
and he is not.

The cell is quiet once again
The world has rained it's sadness upon my chest.
Time for him
in this condemed
nation is almost over.
It's bitter sweet fruit I reluctantly swallow
As it's forced down my soul.
A reminder this day
the forces display
their power
And remind me how insignificant I am.
Alone I dwell in the house of the blind,
connected to one by proximity
And the rest by thought.
Let not my pain strange the joy
Of time moving and exhibiting its change.
For my brother's time
And mine
Is almost finished.