doubtlessly swallow the certainty that
i was nothing but necessary foundation
nothing but your essential stabilization
for your cruelly selfish character to devour
i will continue to conduct my silent sorrow
you couldn't even start to comprehend
so obviously unbeknownst to you,
that this, is the heart, that you grew  
and if you ever bother to read this,
it will still be inaudible to you
i condemn my miserable heart
for individualizing this devious,
oh so lonely creature

you wont bother to read these until i'm ******* dead will you?

grasping pure, vile, blood from me
she is all i can compose
she is my mutilated melody
that i've been waiting for
an isolated life i've lived
under this disfigured cloak i call the sea
i truly fear, that she sees nothing in me
perhaps a view of a decomposer of me
nothing but a glimpse, nothing to see

how far have you ventured into your sexuality
those especially sickening cracks in your filthy bones
a bouquet of dead blood, curiously, impurely artful
relish in the red
as the watered down blood settles into its collar bones
an indecent puppet, on a missing string
feel the alluring wrath of luscious disgust
curious sickness is plentiful here
this now red liquid is slithering down its throat
ahhhhh this dead, red, sea

shutting this lustful devil up into a statue
this is what i must do, to disguise my mutilated view
the ends of its unexperienced mouth tremble and twitch
as i force myself deeper and deeper into its abyss
and those live cheeks, curiously immature
turn to an indecent pink, in my repulsive, quivering hands
this statue i have concocted in my intellect
with these incomplete slots in my brain
there are no boundless alternatives to my, unsettling masterpiece
simply produced and seduced by me

My mind is abusing today
Anything that anyone has said to me
Is rattling in my thoughts, it is torture
I will not leave myself alone
The words are ******* endless
So unbelievably reoccurring
I cannot cease my wounding thought process
I feel perfectly helpless, angry
I want to be ruined
I know it will make me seem better

Dead blood pours out of me
Out of this contaminated being
That is now me
Infecting my precious sea
My stale blood ruining it
Like it ruined me
I believe it's my heart
That makes this lonesome carcass
So utterly repulsive
Or maybe I've been in this sea too long
It has eaten away at me, now I'm rotting
And there is nothing left of me to see