#shaky
When things
started falling apart
I felt the debris
scarring me and scaring me
May 12, 2025
May 12, 2025 at 9:19 AM UTC
We were in this small cafe on our morning
tea break
Me and some of my work colleagues
Someone inquired after my wellbeing
How I was
I motioned with my hand as if to say 'So, so"
Then I said
"I'm still a bit shaky"
'Why", they said, "what happened to you ?"
I answered "I was in a car crash last night"
"What!!!", they all said really concerned, "you shouldn't have come to work today, you should have stayed at home... you might be in
shock!"
Then I said 'It was only a dream'. I went on "Yea, I dreamt I was in a car
crash
I was driving down this terrible winding
mountain road
Like something you'd get over in Italy
It was like a spiral staircase, going round and
round
All these terrible bends
And the car it's getting faster and I know I'm
starting to lose control
So for a moment I look down trying to figure
out the controls
But suddenly when I look up again we've
overshot a Bend
And We're heading straight into a wall
It's like everything goes into slow motion
You know there's no avoiding it
You can only brace yourself for the impact
And then BAM!! POW**!!! .....
And then I can't remember what happened
after that.
Maybe I became unconscious"....then looking
at them all around the table I said
"Maybe I'm still unconscious, maybe I'm just dreaming you guys sitting here
right now
Maybe the dreamworld is the real world
And the real world but a dream...(tapping my finger on the table) a solid dream"
Then I took a sip of my coffee and said
"One thing...the coffee tastes nicer over on
this side".
May 31, 2023
May 31, 2023 at 4:35 PM UTC
I come here
to this island rich in growth
clear warm fluid
to catch its currents
and swim its nurturing depths
where I can breathe underwater
and leave traces of my darkness
to float like drops of ink
in a glass bowl.
These tropics
reside on the map of my heart
for me to locate
when covered
by layers of sand
in the desert
on gray slate days
barren days of lost inspiration
when I am turned in on me
and my tottering self
the me I see
on my pockmarked well-traveled and aged face
each morning in the mirror.
I arrive here
each time with a glimmer
a hope I can find
within me a point of light
some soft and pure place
a source a force
where I can rise again.
Dec 19, 2020
Dec 19, 2020 at 12:02 PM UTC
Trust is a flickering flame
Fragile
Illuminating
Slow-to-grow
Perfect to warm coldest of hearts
Freeze if wind snuffs out it's glow
Do not smoke if your fire is shaky
Can't inhale after it's smothered
Once out must start all over again
New flame
When that dies
Another
Dec 11, 2019
Dec 11, 2019 at 5:50 AM UTC
smiles at day
tears at night
laughs with friends
cries alone
shaky all the time
'i'm fine'
'i already ate'
'i'm full'
'it's nothing'
'it won't happen again'
'don't worry about me'
L I E S
A L L
L I E S
therefore...
i'm not fine
i'm starving myself
i'm hungry
it's something, help me, please
its most definitely going to happen again
worry about me please i need it
May 7, 2018
May 7, 2018 at 1:16 PM UTC
And here I stand
On your doorstep,
With nervous eyes
And shaky hands
Looking for words
And a peace of mind
My luggage is set
But it feels like I'm
Not ready to say
Goodbye.
Dec 26, 2017
Dec 26, 2017 at 9:46 AM UTC
are what i feel when my hands tremble as i pick up the phone
my heart pounds so hard i hear it in my ears as i decide what to do
i pray that you dont answer that i can leave you a message
i dont want to hear your voice i dont i dont i dont
i dont because i know that if i do
ill begin to shake
not shake how i do when im cold or angry but instead
ill shake how i do when im terrified
because the thought of seeing you hearing you merely being around you
it makes me shake so violently
like an iv filled with pure anxiety was stuck into me
yet i talk to you i laugh with you and im around you
not all that often rarely actually
but even still i feel ***** after being near you
and not everyone will see it but the hands.
my hands
will begin to shake.
Sep 5, 2017
Sep 5, 2017 at 3:16 PM UTC
If a delicate heart is placed within a strong grip,
It will never break.
But it is only once we see said grip released,
That we may witness how strong it was to begin with.
For those pesky shaky hands are always imitating,
What they could never be,
Just to get what they could never hold.
Feb 4, 2017
Feb 4, 2017 at 4:18 PM UTC
The thought of you
An uncertain utopia
Shaky and tense
To me makes little sense
The way you look at me
I come undone upon the seems
Holding and gripping
To keep my sanity is crippling
You say you can love me from a distance
But take this for instance
If I said good riddance
Would you see me as the menace?
Dec 6, 2016
Dec 6, 2016 at 1:17 PM UTC
*as if you know anything there is to know about me
nothing you say can prove you know
'grow up' no SHUT UP
really should stop crying
yesterday's tears trace patterns down your cheeks
turn the other way, don't watch me cry
even that patronising tone in your voice makes me tremble
and the way you stare at me with your accusing hazel eyes
rumour has it you're so far gone but still you're just angry tears and*
silence
Nov 28, 2016
Nov 28, 2016 at 1:07 PM UTC
atleast when I am in a cell
blood drips pretty from these wrists
as handcuffs cut through
I am safe from the abuse
slander
and deceit
when freedom looks like ****** handcuffs
they didn’t use the second tool
that stops them from squeezing tighter
and tighter
with steel like unforgivable
cold and ******
and the fullness of the moon
glows through its nearest clouds
red and full of overshadowed doom
like a solar powered night lite
fathomless thought
pervades understanding
dragged two hundred feet
by the chain’s disparity
in-between each handcuff
while stomping on my head and chest
I never used to shake like this
or tremble as if my body
is someone else
Aug 18, 2016
Aug 18, 2016 at 1:06 PM UTC
These hands of mine are shaking violent
Quaking as tidal waves of doubt wash through me
My insecurities eat me up inside as I try
To tell you how I feel like I’m not real and
How I know that if I were to go away
You wouldn’t know any better than if I stayed
And if I cry I might as well
Just tell you about the hell I’m
Living in because my tears show
What my eyes and mouth will never tell they hold
The remnants of my innocent soul and
That’s not something I have much left of due to
The pain I’ve been in all these years the
Suicidal thoughts the ideation all the
Lies and trials and tribulations I’ve
Had to go through all alone
But it was really by choice now
Wasn’t it when I said
That I was fine
And didn’t let you in my mind
I say it was because I felt
Too insecure to share too anxious
To speak of all my thoughts as if
It was Pandora’s box for
The evil in my brain
So instead my hands shake and you ask me
Why do they tremble when all the wind is gone
And it is silent
And I close my eyes to block the tears and tell you just
As those we love are with us
So is all the fear of
Yesterday it was dark and windy and raining and storming
And all around me there were demons howling and I was
Crying and screaming and bleeding but it was me
My fault
I choked
Apr 28, 2016
Apr 28, 2016 at 11:39 PM UTC
My tired eyes cry
My weary body lies
And why do my tears
Think they cannot dry?
Shaky hands and nervous throat
Exhausted heart, this stimulated soul
They ridiculously wait, day after day,
For a break from sorrow, a thing called hope.
How is it that I can live, but it is the hardest thing I ever did?
© Melissa Carlson 2016
Apr 20, 2016
Apr 20, 2016 at 6:47 PM UTC
I'm afraid to be here
At home all alone
When the man in the dark
Could be roaming so close
I'm afraid to be here
After last night
When the man in the dark
Gave me a fright
I'm afraid to be here
With eyes open wide
If the man in the woods
Is lurking outside
I'm afraid to be here
Tell me why did he come
Look up at my window
Hiding for fun
I'm afraid to be here
Without my best friend
Who witnessed him too
Sent our minds in a bend
I'm afraid to be here
Tell me how does he know
The best way to creep
To see my window
I'm afraid to be here
Tell me why was he here?
A chancer, a pervert
A stalker I fear
Feb 17, 2016
Feb 17, 2016 at 6:58 PM UTC
She likes the cold
Its the most open form of honesty she has ever known
She never liked being friends with girls
They are fake
Boys abuse her tragically
Yet she runs to them unconditionally
All she knows is a broken home and a false reality
Actually she doesn't mind for she is a poet
With a strong head and heavy heart
She immerses herself in the unknown and painful
Because she is the soul epitome of what it means to be human
And we can forgive her for that
May 25, 2015
May 25, 2015 at 7:47 PM UTC
Adrenaline
And
Shaky hands
And i guess im not so good.
Im insecure
But you want more
And
I dont know what i can give.
You dont care
About my flaws
You
Have
A goal
In mind
Easy come
Easy go
Im afraid
Thats
Exactly
What
Youll
Do.
Feb 13, 2015
Feb 13, 2015 at 6:07 PM UTC
When I picked up my pen
I wanted to write about comets
and galaxies and forest fires and whirlwinds
I wanted to write about
the way my morning coffee
resembled your dark brown eyes
I wanted to write about the way
my mother’s mascara and lipstick smeared
on the nights my father promised he would come home
but didn’t
I wanted to write about the beach;
how my thoughts were like the immensity of the ocean
and my joy was like the sand
how I let it slip right through my hand
I wanted to write about the way
you were like my cigarettes
and wondered why I loved
everything that destroyed me
I wanted to write about the way
the smell of your cologne lingered on my pillow long after you left
And how I found someone new
but still fell asleep to the thought of you
I wanted to write about the numbness;
the crippling way I felt nothing
and everything at the same time
I wanted to write about every thought I’d ever had,
To drown my demons in ink
And immortalize the act on paper
But when I picked up my pen,
I had a shaky hand
Jan 22, 2015
Jan 22, 2015 at 11:06 PM UTC
blue waves
sorta; kinda,
a little bit shaky
pink oceans
sorta; kinda,
a little bit crazy
green moons
sorta; kinda,
a little bit fun
purple people
sorta; kinda,
a little bit strange
Aug 8, 2014
Aug 8, 2014 at 10:16 PM UTC
Your hands are trembling touches, shaky decisions, and warm wishes
Your lips like soft pillows, unrelenting waves, and firm beliefs
Your mouth like home, like hungry minds, like silent promises
Your shoulders like stability
Your chest like my hiding place
Your back like protection, like a shield, like my security
Your arms like a seatbelt, like heaters, like my comfort
Words like sugar
Eyes like oceans
Hair like down
Voice like honey
Dégagé
Feb 10, 2014
Feb 10, 2014 at 7:44 PM UTC