#screwup
Turmoil chokes me,
Hideous flames burn me within
As I stand coward-like and helpless
Gazing at the walls caving in
Bright colours in my periphery, I see
Hurrying past me whispering curses
For I have murdered and ripped them apart
Yet again, for the millionth time
Jun 17, 2025
Jun 17, 2025 at 5:58 PM UTC
I mess up a lot
For example;
I got off the ***
And then I sh!t
Believe it or not
But that was after this thought,
"I don't have a shot
At the life I want
The break I need
Will never be caught
It must be written into the plot
So wether I like it or not
This is my spot"
And that matches up
With what I've been told
And what I was taught
You get what you get
I got what I got
©2024
Sep 7, 2024
Sep 7, 2024 at 3:22 PM UTC
No matter what I do, I'm always being told what I'm doing wrong.
"Just stop! You can't do anything right!"
"Why do you do the things you do?!"
"Can't you do anything right?"
As I sit in this lonely bed tonight, all I can think of is how I'm the screwup of my life.
How I will never achieve the statuses my elders have.
How I keep letting those around me down.
I am the screwup.
Nothing more and nothing less.
Feb 4, 2020
Feb 4, 2020 at 2:24 PM UTC
How do you feel
When you trained yourself not to
I’m sorry
I don’t want you to hurt
That’s not what I’m going for
I just **** up a lot
Forgive me now
And forgive me when I ***** up again
My imperfections run deep
Nov 30, 2019
Nov 30, 2019 at 2:58 AM UTC
I'm sorry I'm the ***** up mum
I wish I was the daughter
That you could admire
Instead I just destroy
Everything I desire
I'm sorry I'm the ***** up mum
And I'm not like the siblings you love
I promise you that I'm trying
But I know that it will
Never quite be enough
I'm sorry I'm the ***** up mum
The others seem to find it so easy
I wish I could breeze through life
Without a care
Just like the others
I'm sorry I'm the ***** up mum
I promise you I'm working
Towards a better future for us all
Even if it feels like
It's just a steady crawl
I'm sorry I'm the ***** up mum
I love you more than words can say
I would do absolutely anything
To make you proud
One day
Mar 4, 2019
Mar 4, 2019 at 3:03 AM UTC
They think I'm a screw-up
I tell myself "well that's fine"
"I'll just prove them wrong"
But with each attempt I make
It only proves them right
Nov 2, 2018
Nov 2, 2018 at 12:31 AM UTC
i deny the urge to kiss the lips i once kissed
to say the words i always said
i yearn for her love
her touch
her
yet...
i ******* up
i ******* everything up
she still loves me, or so she says
but i'm not with her
i'm with her best friend
whom i like a lot
but...
i love h e r
May 7, 2018
May 7, 2018 at 1:32 PM UTC
Criticize my every move you constantly remind me when I lose tell me to be myself and then judge me for who I am I giving it my all and you don't seem to notice tough love you call it ,fighting for your approval since I've met you and can't seem to make you proud sorry for being a failure .... .
Feb 22, 2018
Feb 22, 2018 at 4:00 PM UTC
I watched a movie once,
where this girl keeps ruining her life
as she and her brother walk on a beach he asks her whats going on
and she turns to him and says "Maybe I'm the faller. The one who doesnt get the boy, the one who never gets an A. The one who trips and stumbles and pulls everybody down with her. every family has one. ours must be me."
i hear her say this, and i hear the pain in her voice as she says it,
and i realize that i am the faller.
i ***** up
i cause pain to my family
how can someone who never does anything right even come close to
standing up straight?
Oct 24, 2016
Oct 24, 2016 at 6:36 PM UTC
She walks on egg shells
there is no second chance
she wears a dress of broken glass
the consequences will be dire
She's heard it all her life
this isn't baseball- there's only one strike
Even in drama games
one small ***** up
one unintentional mistake
the crowd goes wild
SHEEEEEEEE'SSSSSS OUT OF HERE!
Jul 27, 2015
Jul 27, 2015 at 3:45 PM UTC
Crawl crawl
Burning through
Obsessions
Rotten stew
Crawl crawl
Through the pain
Remission
Is a joke
And life was a game
But is a remainder
of screwups and screwdowns
Crawl Crawl
Burning through
Possessions
Deadbeat crew
Crawl crawl
Forgotten stains
Permission
Is always denied
And rebuttals dumped
In trash cans full
of screwups and screwdowns
Drilling a hole
Finding geodes where a core was
Cold and dark and empty
Drilling a hole
Finding loneliness inside
It is who you are
Extinguished supernovae
Could have contained
And still the darkness would have stayed
Crawl crawl
burning through
your house of cards
melting all definitions
You're a screwup
Still alive
Feb 26, 2015
Feb 26, 2015 at 12:54 PM UTC
Me, myself, and I.
I'm crazy, I'm dysfunctional, I'm me.
I am bubbly, I am loud, I am me.
I'm sassy, I'm rude, but I'm just me.
I am kind, I am loving, but I am just me.
I can be understanding, I can be stubborn, I can be me.
I can't be perfect, I can't be you, I can be me.
I can be pretty, I can be natural, I can be me.
I can't be a genius, I can't be Einstein, I can be me.
Me, Myself, and I.
I am not you, I am not her, I am not him. I am ME.
I am not sorry that I'm not perfect.
I am not sorry that I'm a ***** up.
Deal with it. I am me.
Dec 19, 2014
Dec 19, 2014 at 6:22 PM UTC
I would use the force of mind to illustrate things.
To solve things, and to love things the way they should need to be loved by the air they breath.
I can't control the musings of my hairy body.
It ate my soul up and sprouted fleshy wings of blood and
and
and
hey.
I like you.
Don't let me talk too much and ***** this up.
Oct 25, 2014
Oct 25, 2014 at 12:54 PM UTC
My pain irks me,
Sends me flying into my bed.
Under the cover of darkness.
As I cry myself awake,
Unable to sleep.
I ask myself..
Why?
Why am I such a ***** up?
Why do I make mistakes,
Knowing my parents will be angry?
My tears intensify,
My claws take my skin,
Leaving ****** marks...
I scream in my head,
Rocking to the beat of my music,
That sings in my ear bud.
Evanescence,
Rascal Flatts.
Plumb.
Crossfade.
I cannot find peace..
All I feel is that pain.
That has ****** me over for,
Five years.
I'm only a teenager,
I only can take so much.
Until Its over.
I've already tried once...
What makes you think I'll try again?
Dad,
What makes you so ******
Taking it out on me,
Because I don't listen?
Why can't you and my step mom,
Just realize..
That I'm only Seventeen..
And so it says,
My title will always stay.
Lone wolf forever..
I cant be perfect,
It's just not my style.
My life is so different,
I cry even harder.
Mistakes,
Promises broken.
Two faced liars..
God,
Why aren't you here?
I need you..
And I need you now..
As my pain intensifies,
All I see is the cascading shadows.
Watching my every move...
My music doesn't help anymore..
Jul 15, 2014
Jul 15, 2014 at 11:29 PM UTC