#confliction
A silk silver lustre drapes gently down,
Gracing the moment’s frame. But ladder stitched,
Hides the dowdy lens like a Pantone brown.
Misplaced among the masses’ chic, bewitched,
The lens nests, seduced by stiff zipper grilles.
Eagerly dormant, long and forgotten,
Poses a masked hunter, preserving stills.
A Snow White music box on soft cotton,
Displayed, she waits in a regretting fog.
Wind calms, caught in the fleeting, silk-warm rays.
Limbs waver, torn amidst the pulling bog
Of unintentional judgmental gaze,
And the vast, vermillion-rich, puffed billow.
Lapsed, the eye indents deep down the pillow.
Mar 5
Mar 5, 2026 at 10:24 PM UTC
It's true, I usually don't know what to do
What if I'm not around long enough to follow through?
Never know if my way or the highway is the right way
What did that sign say?
Will it be possible to recognize this impending last day
Even if just a day before it's referred to as "Ah shiit, is that today?"
This is foul,
Where do I go and what do I do now?
And just because I know what to do doesn't mean I'll comprehend the how
Who in their right mind could stand here and say they could handle the architecture and atmosphere of so many types of conflicting fear?
Who's the stranger with the black soul looking back at me in the mirror?
I wish it was clearer
But there's never a gene around ever
Take note that not every question has a viable answer
While some answers only raise more questions after filtering through questionable ********** banter
That's why there's a little manic in the laughter
And a wave of panic soon after
©2024
Feb 15, 2024
Feb 15, 2024 at 3:48 PM UTC
The pain stings deeper than ever before
I'm not sure what I've done in this life or a past life to get dealt this hand
The winds howl, as the storm surges on inside of me
I just want to burry myself then keep on digging
Because maybe the darkness or silence will accept me
Maybe I cant fight anymore
Forgetting what it was I was even fighting for
Because I loved,
Oh my God did I love
Without boundaries or false pretence
With pure acceptance and irrefutable forgiveness
The love was pure
The pain that drives into me, will send me to madness
I want to be missed like I miss you Because by God do I miss you
Where is my silver lining
Mar 17, 2021
Mar 17, 2021 at 6:07 PM UTC
so close, but out of focus, we made basic motions,
random notions, sipped upon a potent potion, but it was not the solution to our issues,
still to this day eye miss you, still wanna trust you,
but in the end you crushed me,
its still punishing,
if only eye had 20 20 vision,
you were first and last,
every time eye think of you its a blast from the past,
some of the happiest times of my life,
though in the end you chose him over me,
when you chose to cheat that should of been the end,
but at the time eye was overly dependent on your company,
so why did you have to hold up a front on me?
why not just dump me?
it was obvious you no longer enjoyed my company,
were you trying to spare me the heart break?
or were you just always being fake?
was eye your biggest mistake?
or were you just too afraid to be true to yourself?
now you are just corrosive,
breaking down my defenses,
leaving me open to new attacks,
but you never covered your tracks.......
©Try
Aug 15, 2018
Aug 15, 2018 at 3:32 PM UTC
Feelings of new, not witnessed before
it churns, makes the heart ache.
Feelings experienced within a new light,
yet fear is all that can be swallowed.
Months have passed and fall is gone,
and yet the feelings are somewhat whole.
Leap of faith, right off the cliff,
Potentially catastrophic.
Doubt constantly anew in mind
Yet it can't think of a reason why?
why not to do this? They're here, no?
But for how long..
Communications are sparse with distance,
Is this really what they want?
It's doubtful.. Nobody really wants this..
Doomed to isolation of a stilled heartbeat,
they don't want it.. they don't want it.
do they? I don't know.. Fearful.
Hope is wanted, faith be achieved.
Happily ever after, that's the goal
Please forgive the hallowed belief,
it's all that's ever been known.
Give your hand, interlace it with mine
and please just never let go.
Aug 10, 2018
Aug 10, 2018 at 1:06 AM UTC
I've walked miles in these shoes
Not many destinations were places I'd choose
Hard to say exactly who I was back then
When footsteps disappear in the sand
A mirage of an oasis in the distance
More like a long ago wish
I can never shake this feeling
That I'll ever truly obtain an outlet
So I just type out confusing puzzles
In order to get out feelings in words
Just to explain who I am in a world like this
Jun 30, 2018
Jun 30, 2018 at 8:28 AM UTC
i find it hard to let you know
what is really going through my mind
because words tend to stay locked
behind a wall of confusion
and the looks you give me
only reflect the sadly truthful words
you had said not too long ago,
blinding anything i’ve ever wanted
to give to you
and leaving behind only a shadow
hiding away the limp thoughts
i regret not saying sooner
but there is still this hollow feeling i get
that begs for recognition in the midst
of moving on
that makes falling seem just so right
again
because when you ask me if i love you,
i only wish i had the courage to say
“you make it hard for me not to.”
Mar 15, 2018
Mar 15, 2018 at 12:05 AM UTC
i stand in a graveyard.
i see, though i am blinded by the past.
i see millions of tombstones surrounding me,
each one has words i dare not read.
i am scared,
and i am alone.
though i am not alone, there are ghosts who hold faces that are familiar around me.
they tell me that the light shall come soon.
they promise me this.
i do not believe them,
i have been fooled too many times.
and as i walk throughout this graveyard i come to a realization;
no matter how many ghosts stand by my side,
i am the only one who is of real flesh and bone.
who stands above the ground and not beneath it.
i cannot come to terms if this is good or not.
Feb 25, 2018
Feb 25, 2018 at 2:18 PM UTC
*You wouldn't just leave,
that was never gonna be enough for you.
You wanted to drag my soul through the pits of misery,
have it's beauty carved on glass...
...because you knew just how easily it could break.
You wanted to take every part of me there was to take,
just so you could rip me to shreds...
...leaving me in pieces
that could never mend.
Little did you know that I was already detached from my being...
...the moment you thought you were becoming one with it.
That I was so estranged from the person you knew...
...because I was already becoming someone you would never get to know.
You took all there was to take,
not because you had that power over me,
but rather
because I gave up what was no longer necessary for my existence.*
Feb 16, 2018
Feb 16, 2018 at 4:46 PM UTC
long days = long nights
long nights
are the only thing i’ve been trained for.
i’ve been chained to you.
long nights become longer
because i am missing you.
you are my hope to be who i want to be,
but you are the only thing
that's holding me back from being
me.
Dec 6, 2017
Dec 6, 2017 at 8:28 PM UTC
Raised from parents meant for me to be a good boy,
then found out how to take this life and play it like a toy.
Seeing both the heads and the tails, been so sure and been the second guessing.
Found how to curse another who also taught me the way to count my blessings.
There's only truly the good, bad, and fake.
Looking from the starting point of being clean and being baked.
Been fake for too long now I got to choose,
I've been in all the sizes and the brands of shoes.
Life's a ***** but should I own it?
Should I swallow my pride or overflow it.
Felt like heaven, gone through hell,
Have known the people that now probably sell.
Woke up today righteous, fell asleep worse.
Started counting up my blessings then only stopped to find a curse.
Should of chosen for good right now, why's it so hard?
By this time I've went all night, eyes feeling scarred.
Tired but I won't stop, my heart won't let me.
My mind saying, "get to sleep" cause that's all I need
Dec 4, 2016
Dec 4, 2016 at 4:22 PM UTC
Is a word...it has a meaning but each to its own,
I. Am stronger than you think
Stronger than I look...
My mental strength is minimal and im breaking down losing the plot
Physically Im weak and have nothing to me, a pushover
Im expected to be strong
If im not strong for us and those around me who will be?
Im expected to be strong when im not
Yet I push that fact aside and put a smile on my face so it pleases you
*Are you happy now?
Look im stronger...for you...for us hehe...*
I may be more broken than I appear
But then again I may appear more broken than I am...
...whose to even know anymore
To truly smile....I have forgotten how
When Im going insane with everything in my head now
Ive gone mad inside and I need some clarity
The only person who can help me is me...
...isnt it a pity Im too lost in my head to figure out how
We'll work on it
Until then I will be strong for you and for us
I am not strong...
...I am you'll find actually quite quite weak...
Jun 15, 2015
Jun 15, 2015 at 5:58 AM UTC
Oh how our imperfections make us perfect for each other.
She held me and said “It’s about you, and you are I”
Grip tightened, bones creaking.
… “You’re insane”
And you’re a genius.
A kiss planted,
I caved into her chest and let the waves cradle me, bring me in.
A kiss planted,
On the grounds of untouched land.
Sinking… Euphoria?
Sinking nonetheless.
May 4, 2015
May 4, 2015 at 10:38 PM UTC
*I would tell you all the things
we do while in my dreams
but it would only change the basis of our chemistry.
Will we remain just friends
while still sending lustful grins?
Please send me a sign, an epiphany.
I know it all too well
friends that turned lovers only to fail,
so how can I know for certain?
I guess for now we'll play this game
of dancing near enticing flames,
while we remain behind this curtain.*
-Bobbie Leigh
Mar 9, 2015
Mar 9, 2015 at 8:12 PM UTC
I just wish I could get my
head and my heart
to play on the same team,
but they are constantly
at
odds.
My heart still yearns for
a man that
never loved me to begin with,
convinces me that
it's worth responding when
he texts me some
empty ******** that
momentarily assuages his guilt
for his selfishness.
On a Saturday night when
all my friends are off with
someone who loves them,
my heart pumps heavy
against my hollowed chest,
trying to manipulate my
fingers like weak little
puppets,
persuading them to send a text
I will regret in the morning.
My heart replays the words he spoke,
the times he made me feel like I mattered,
the way our bodies made art,
how he understood me like
no one else ever has.
What if I made a mistake,
my heart demands of me,
a mistake in cutting him out,
in choosing to ignore his texts,
in attempting to move forward?
What if no one else will
ever open
their ears to all of my secrets,
their eyes to all of my skeletons,
their hearts to all of my mistakes?
What if I missed my
chance for love?
Remember, my heart whispers,
how he stayed up all night
unfolding himself
and
how you shared your poetry
and
how he sent you a text a day with
a new matter to ponder
and
how he knew what you thought
before you said a word
and
how he understood every
face you made and what it meant
and
how the lyrics you heard
always mattered to him
and
how he cared about what you were learning
and
how the minuscule moments
of your life meant the world to him...
or so he claimed.
And then my brain swoops in
to remind me how
he was all words, no action.
Days and weeks went by
without a peep
even though the week before
he had insisted on showing up at your
apartment five days in a row.
All he cared to do with you,
my brain recalls,
is share a smoke on the roof
and discuss life,
but never did he once care to
share in the outside world
with someone who he so claimed to love.
My brain reminds me of
the secrets he kept,
of the woman he lived with
behind my back,
of the gross refusal to make a commitment
even when he claimed
he would think of me in his last moments
and that he had never
felt for another like he did for me.
My brain knows of his emptiness,
of his excuse-making,
of how he blamed everything on his
pathetic circumstances
when he really was just a
selfish ******* who deserves
not a moment more of my time,
ever.
When I get those texts
that claim he's thinking of me
after church or
send me song lyrics in some
pathetic attempt to reawaken our
"connection,"
my brain reminds me to
ignore,
to remember that words are empty,
to wait until he becomes man enough
to give me what I deserve.
My heart makes me weak.
My brain keeps me strong.
My heart wants you.
My brain doesn't need you.
And even though I want
to listen to my heart,
my brain knows better.
Feb 8, 2015
Feb 8, 2015 at 12:25 AM UTC
I want someone to
Roll over and **** I want
You, here, holding me.
Dec 29, 2014
Dec 29, 2014 at 5:13 PM UTC
16w
I love you too much to go
But I love myself too much to stay.
Nov 17, 2014
Nov 17, 2014 at 12:48 PM UTC
tell me about the callouses on your hands & how i can heal them on my heart.
i want the remnants of them to be found if anyone dared to dust there.
maybe i should stop thinking about you so much;
you come with an auditory label that screams "danger here" & you
sound your alarm every time i feel close,
but i have selective hearing so you're only ever alarming yourself-
i know you're good.
we don't fight for the things we don't love,
& you were birthed from love & war so i know the battles
you pick are worth it,
even the ones you pick against yourself.
this poem began as a declaration that I love you but
you already know that, so let this serve as a reminder instead.
you are fire & i love to be burned,
you are stars & i love to wonder,
you are love & war & you & perfect
& perfect & perfect & perfect & perfect
& you,
so let this serve as a reminder.
Nov 1, 2014
Nov 1, 2014 at 7:15 PM UTC