i continue to write sad poems
even though i don’t feel sad anymore
maybe it’s the comfort
maybe i have nothing else to write anymore

Maybe i should stop
Giving myself another year
I’ve been trying for three years
And thought i was getting better
I am getting worse
I could still hear death
There’s still no happiness
Perhaps I should end this
So I wouldn’t be stuck in this maze
I can’t win anyway

I still feel empty
One word and I’m back at it
I can’t cry anymore
I wanna scream at them
For not seeing through me
How many more years should I pretend
How many more years should i suffer
How many more years should i fake it
How many more years should i tell myself
Just one more year
Let’s end this here

All i can remember
From my teenage years
Is that i was always angry
I was angry for being alive
I was angry at this world
I was angry for no reason
I was angry at myself
I was angry because of my parents
I was angry for being stuck at my parents’ house
I was angry for wasting so much time being angry
I was just angry all the time
Nothing was memorable
Now I am angry for reaching this age
And not learning about life
I am angry for remembering
My teenage years