What would you say if I took my own life?
Would you ignore me then like you ignore me now,
would you sit down and cry?

What would you do if you saw me lying on the bed.
Drenched in a pool of red sticky mess,
lying down where I had bled.

Would you come to a conclusion,
that you loved me like before.
Or would you turn around and walk on out,
because I mean nothing to you anymore.

Would you remember how my hands felt,
wrapped around your waist.
Would you remember how we'd hold each other,
always feeling safe.

And then would you think of how you left me,
to hurt all on my own.
Never sending a kind word my way,
never picking up your phone.

Would you regret cancelling plans,
or fighting on that one day.
Would you regret leaving everything unsaid,
would you have anything to say.

Would you kiss my cold forehead,
like I kissed yours once warm.
Would you feel like your whole world was crashing around you,
can you feel your heart being torn.

Would you realize that I loved you,
always putting you before.
Would you realize that you loved me too,
and wish you'd given more.

I think of all these scenarios that go on through my head.
The saddest part about it all is you wouldn't care if I were dead.

When I was young and bold and strong,
Oh, right was right, and wrong was wrong!
My plume on high, my flag unfurled,
I rode away to right the world.
"Come out, you dogs, and fight!" said I,
And wept there was but once to die.

But I am old; and good and bad
Are woven in a crazy plaid.
I sit and say, "The world is so;
And he is wise who lets it go.
A battle lost, a battle won--
The difference is small, my son."

Inertia rides and riddles me;
The which is called Philosophy.

I found it today
as I sifted through my malice
mix this liquid called intent
rub it deep into the callous

Came across the finish square
so long ago, I felt the flame
rolled the dice once more but backwards
I couldn’t quit the game

I found it today
as descriptions beg for air
I nailed it to the stilling floor
convinced one day I’d care

Came across the final need
’twas years ago I saw the fear
rolled the dice once more but backwards
love couldn’t interfere

I found it today
as the moment shrieked delight
in the mists of intermediance
shroud the horror of my plight

Came across the mirrored quest
centuries of bleeding feet
rolled the dice once more forever
I couldn’t find a seat

~Shea